Let's Play: Thera Total War

[IGdood]

Hello fellow SF Knights/Samurai! It's skitarii. If you've been looking at my Let's Plays, then you'll know I'm a Total War fan. I just finished off that Empire Total War playthrough with the Knights of St. John, conquering the whole world! And I'm about to start a new playthrough, hell yes? Anyways, this time I'll be playing Thera:Legacy The Great Torment. It's a modification of the Medieval 2 Total War game.

Now, before I dwell further into the mod, I'll make a quick, copy-pasting introduction for newcomers to the Total War series and forumites interested in looking at this LP.

Total War series is probably one of the most involved strategy games ever. I'll give some basics, but you'll be learning as I go through the campaign and such.

The game is mainly divided into two segments: Turn-based and real-time.

In the turn-based segments you move your armies around, manage your cities, train troops, make diplomacy, assassinate enemy generals, spy on enemy cities and whatnot. This is probably the part that turns most casual gamers away, it gets very taxing keeping track of everything. You can probably sense my whining on the other LPs, heheheh.

Real-time occurs when your armies clash with others on the world map. The game will do a pretty epic zoom-in onto the map (or just go straight to the battle on the much older 2D games). Your general (or captain if you didn't put one there) will give a speech that could be heroic or shitty (if he's insane or cowardly) and you can position your men. After that you can begin the battle and start making your moves.

Units are not single individuals, but are groups of soldiers, which can range from 80 (knights, elites) to 200 (peasants, low quality infantry) Growths are static, with every level up increasing attack and defence by 1. There are named characters who are part of your royal family, and they become generals if placed in an army. They also grow depending on the situations you put them in on the battlefield, which can lead to very awesome warriors or very....umm...insane people. This can boost or screw over your troops' stats.

The main goal of the game is to conquer your enemies, or if you're into roleplaying history, you can be merciful or just do nothing and watch what the other countries do.

In battle, the main goal is to rout the enemy, basically break their will to fight. So, with clever positioning and even with lesser soldiers, you can defeat armies who are theoretically superior. Usually if people are getting chopped from the front, shot at in the sides, and charged in the back, it usually guarantees a rout. You can choose to let them run away and fight you on a better day, or you can chase and cut them down like the dogs they are.

So....for this particular installment of Total War, it's based on Medieval 2: Total War, which puts us in a setting that most, if not all, FE fans are familiar with. This is an age of knights, archers, swordsmen, etc. Melee-combat is much emphasized, perhaps even moreso than Shogun 2 Total War since heavy cavalry are actually extremely powerful, usually killing off whole units in their charges (fucking knights!). Since it's an older game, the graphics aren't as great, but it doesn't matter too much. Because if there's one thing Medieval 2 did right, it's blood. No, I'm not talking about the tiny blood splatches frm units getting shot. No, your units will BE covered in blood as they fight, just to show how fucking gritty the setting is. (Well I think the mod still kept this setting, I actually haven't tried it!)

Alright, what's Thera Total War? It's like....a mish mash of most of the common historical cultures in video games pitted against each other. Like....Medieval knights vs. Renaissance gunners vs. Romans....etc. I'll explaint he factions more. I've never played this mod before, so I'm pretty much walking into this blindly. I've done some preliminary research on the different factions, but I've already made my choice which one I'll be playing as.

Anyways, expect to see these guys to be our allies, enemies, or just neutrals in this game. Most likely enemies.

The backstory that allows such an impossible scenario to exist is thus:

Back in the good ol' days, people were living happily and whatnot, maybe you have a few wars here and there but life was good. Then the great torment happened. Volcanoes, earthquakes, tsunamis, whatnot belched death and poison and lots and lots of smoke in the air. Communities became isolated for an extremely long time, and eventually all these different cultures and peoples evolved. Weird huh? Anyways, if you're interested in the mod's backstory, I think you can read a bit here. You can also read up on the different factions, I believe.

http://www.twcenter....ad.php?t=343327

But, of course, if you're like me, who doesn't care so much about the story and more about the various MILITARIES of the different factions then I'll give a quick rundown.

Lao Che Khanate, a mish mash of Chinese, Mongolian, and Japanese, and whatever else Asian culture. Shit infantry (late game samurai though, I believe), mostly relies on cavalry to get the job done.

Sycorax Nation, based off of the Native Americans in North America. Although they may wield guns.

Kingdom of Avalon - Based off of Middle Age England (no not Britain), specializes in longbows, more longbows, polearms, and knights on foot.

Royame des Bons Chevaliers - Based on medieval France, using powerful knights, crossbows, and polearms.

Faustian Reich, based off of Renaissance Germany. Closely related to Empire Total War units.

Ducado de Sangre Valiente - Based off of Renaissance Spain and its COnquistadores, a good balance of infantry, cavalry, and gunpowder units.

Holy Order of the Pale Knights - Based off of the crusaders in Jerusalem and the Principalties of Antioch, tends to have a rather fanatical theme and knights.

League of Privateers - Based off of.....well jee, I have no idea. It's another gunpowder nation.

Warriors of Kukulcan - Based off of the Incans.

Gaelic Nations - Based off of pagan (Dark Age, before medieval) Scotland and Ireland and Welsh and....Northrumbians...and...Picts..and....whatever, think Braveheart. These guys still have their facepaint on.

Romuli Empire - Romans. I will be playing as the Romuli. Then I won't need to do a LP of Rome Total War, HA! Anyways, LEGIONNAIRES.

Seriously, Fire Emblem should have a legionnaire class. They'd be resistant to missile attacks, be slow, have high defense, have a low attack, and uses swords and javelins.

Men of Wotan - A mish mash of Norse and Russian and Cossacks, before they were Christian anyways. Probably will see a lot of cavalry on the field.

Tahar Caliphate - Based off of...I think..the Turks or maybe the Moors (that's the area below Spain)? They use camels, elephants, grenades on elephants, gunpowder...

Vashta Sultanate - Okay, this looks more like the Turks (Persians?!) to me....but I'm really unfamiliar with my Arab/Middle Eastern/North African/Nubian history. Help me out here.

Barka Sultanate - Okay this is based off of Egypt for sure and their Mamelukes.

Men of Valhalla - Vikings. And a shit ton of axes.

Povos da hispania. This would be Spain before the middle ages. Obsessed with throwing javelins.

Grand Duchy of Dracule - Based off of Eastern European knights in Poland, Lithuania, Transylvania, etc. Since it's THOSE places they also have a huge theme revolving around blood and vampires.

Paynal Empire - Aztecs. Down to their jaguar warriors.

Teutonic Order - Based off of the grimdark, pagan-killing Germanic knighthood order that led its own crusades against pagan Eastern Europe.

Uruk Dominion - Lord of the Ring Orcs. Fuck.

I will talk more about changes from the other LPs as I play.

Long live the Romuli!

Anyway, unit naming will probably follow that of Shogun 2 Total War. Someone picks a unit and sticks with it.

Edited September 4, 2011 by skitarii

[Rewjeo]

Silly skitarii, you still have to do Rome: Total War.

I look forward to this, although I expect I'll be very confused by this brand new universe.

[IGdood]

Yeah, I'll probably be confused too. There's 21 playable factions, and the forums don't list the sub-factions....and whatnot. Apparently there are so many different units they hit the unit type limit in the game.

Apparently the mod creators DO want players to go into this blind. I bet it'll be fun. ...and probably I can expect casualties. Lots of them.

Maybe I can do a LP of Barbarian Invasion...not the main game....boohoohoo.

I hope that besides the usual group, more people will post comments in this LP.....I know who you are, I see your usernames lurking.

Edited July 9, 2011 by skitarii

[IGdood]

So, let's get some of the basics out of the way. It's kinda funny that the older games actually have more details than the newer games.

I'm assuming this is some sort of in-game hint for my future actions. Point taken, let's conquer eastwards, then.

Ah yes, the campaign map interface. Lower left is the map showing the season (sun = summer?) and date. Lower right shows my money, what I'm building in the selected settlement (currently none) and who I'm training....as well as finances and other miscellaneous info. The middle would show the buildings in a settlement and its troops, but I have none selected right now.

So the Romuli Empire start off with 4 provinces. Here's 3 of them. Actually, I don't know if I should term them provinces...well maybe I should, but you'll hear me refer to them as settlements/cities/castles also, since things work a bit differently compared to Shogun 2 and Empire. Thing is, all the buildings are consolidated into the settlement, so no raiding and such. Yeah, you can have someone sabotage buildings. Anyway.

Here's the fourth one.

No outstanding missions right now.

Clicking the overview button gives me some information about....well...general stuff. I get to see who the faction leader is, a family tree, turn number...etc..... Named characters (generals) play a very important role Medieval 2 and Rome, and to a lesser extent, Shogun 2. In Empire, you can pretty much get by without using generals. Here, named characters are part of your royal family, and they gain traits alot more often than in Shogun 2 and Empire. Hell, their bodyguard units kick major ass too!

The Rosters list just shows where your characters are, where your armies are....etc. There's a similar feature in Shogun2 and Empire which I probably didn't get around to showing you guys with.

Generals also double up as governors in this game. As a governor, they increase public order and income in a settlement. However, if they have some really bad personality traits they can actually DECREASE public order.

Agents come in a few flavors: Namely, Priests, Spies, Assassins, Diplomats and Princesses. Priests spread religion, and so can decrease public order in other settlements provided their religion is different frm yours, and increase public order in your own provinces if there's religious unrest. They can also burn witches at the stake and denounce heretics from spreading their foul beliefs.

Spies just gather info and have a pretty far sight range. That's about it....

Assassins kill other agents, generals, you name it. They can also sabotage buildings.

Diplomats conduct diplomacy, a feature which was simplified in Empire and Shogun 2 with mere button clicks. In Medieval 2, you have to get a diplomat to touch/make contact with another faction's diplomats/settlements/armies to be able to initiate diplomacy (trade agreements, gifts, alliances) with them. They can also bribe enemy armies not to join you, but to disband, however if units are part of your faction roster or they're named characters then they may join you for an exorbitant price.

Princesses are part of your royal family. They can initiate diplomacy but cannot bribe. They can also marry other faction's generals to secure marriage alliances, or they can...well...try to seduce away generals from other factions and they may join your royal family. However....there's always a chance that this can backfire and your princess ends up the one being seduced! Princesses also retire much much earlier from old age; if they cannot find a suitable marriage candidate the game might give them one...or they might retire and become a spinster for the rest of their lives (usually accompanied by a message with the sound of a crying woman.)

Settlements are divided into 2 types in Medieval 2. We have castles and cities. As the population of a settlement grows, you are allowed to upgrade it to a higher level. In Empire, this is witnessed as new towns developing (which can further be developed into schools, religious buildings, factories, pleasure areas). Here, you have to build an upgrade which then unlocks the next tier of buildings. There are a lot of building types in Medieval 2, since units come from different buildings as opposed to a single 1 in Empire. Think Shogun 2, except you can build an unlimited number of buildings in Medieval 2.

Right, castles and cities. Cities earn you money and usually have a lot of economic and civil improvement buildings. However, they're more prone to civil unrest and governors stationed in cities tend to acquire traits of corruption and embezzlement. Cities usually produce the crappier soldiers of a faction, although they may have free upkeep since they're "militia." They're also harder to defend, only surrounded by a single wall. Castles are your professional unit-producing settlements. They're also extremely hard to defeat in an assault and have high public order. Governors stationed in a castle may get pretty bored, but hey at least they won't be stealing your money or something.

Right, let's take a look at the right panel, basically that tells me about the settlement and the governor, if it has one. So, Brutus Germanicus is the governor. He's younger than me, and he's a noob. Command boosts your troop's morale and lowers enemy morale to some degree. Chivalry is a measure of how nice your character is. High chivalry boosts troop morale and public order. However, if your character begins to go for rather unconventional tactics and slaughters civilians, then you'll have a Dread rating instead of chivalry. Dread lowers enemy morale and boosts public order through fear, bot through happiness. A general with maxed out dread can cause enemy armies to rout just by him charging.

Loyalty is...well...loyalty. Generals with low loyalty may have a chance of backstabbing you and rebelling. They may also be more easily seduced by foreign princesses. Piety is a measure of how religious they are. Not sure what that affects, though.

Dirt roads allow your soldiers to move faster along the....dirt roads in a region. They also facilitate trade between your cities.

Ports allow trade fleets to go between cities, and with trade agreements they work even better. They also let you build basic ships. There are no real time naval battles in Medieval 2, only autoresolve.

Religious buildings usually confer some bonus depending on what god its dedicated to.

A barracks is found inside a castle settlement, and trains a fair number of soldiers (this is for the ROmuli, I'm sure the other factions have an equivalent building)

Castles get upgraded by upgrading the whole structure. Cities upgrade by upgrading the wall itself.

A bowyer is a castle only building that produces ranged units.

A ballista maker is the most basic in siege buildings. It creates ballista, a giant crossbow of sorts.

A leather tanner upgrades the armor of some units....probably the most basic ones.

A land clearance is the most basic of farming upgrades. It improves population growth and income, I think.

A great Temple is an improvement to the regular temple.

Stables train basic cavalry units.

A mustering hall trains the most basic of units.

A practice range is an improvement of the bowyer, I think.

Mines boost income by a bit.

Ballista towers basically give you an edge against long-ranged siege weapons if you ever happen to come under siege.

A provincial circus is like...a place to gamble horse races....and also to train some cavalry units. Anyway, it makes people happy.

A brothel is where spies can be recruited...and where the population can get some happiness boosts.

A catapult maker is an improvement on the ballista maker. Catapults are also infinitely better than ballistas.

This is.....a training area for elite units, I believe?

A victory shrine is a rather grisly structure that inspires Romuli citizens....and converts them to their religion....

Now time to introduce the units. Here's a priest.

Here's a galley, a rather basic unit. Ah, look to the right panel. Here you can see the retinue and traits of a character. Traits affect the stats of a person, as well as other things such as happiness to settlement, etc. Retinues contain either people that follow your character around and impart bonuses or penalties, as well as particular items that the general may be holding. Here the Banner of the First Legion gives a boost to command, i think. I forgot to highlight it.

Ah, the unit stats screen. It's pretty different from Shogun 2 and Empire. I'll explain.

Top left hourglass means the number of turns required to train one of these units. 780 is the cost.

There's 30 soldiers in this unit. It's got 0 experience when trained.

It has a melee attack of 6, a charge bonus (added to melee attack) when charging, and these stats apply to melee.

Total defense is used in melee. However, when under attack from missiles, only armor and shield ratings apply. Armor protects from all attacks from all directions. Defense skill only protects from melee attacks from the front. Shields protect from all attacks coming from the front and left (or was it right?) This makes rear and flank attacks more effective.

Hit Points is 1, meaning that only one lethal hit is required to kill a man from this unit. So if a hit point is 2, then you'll need to perform 2 lethal hits (not blocks, not glancing blows) to kill a person.

You've got your abilities and a small unit description.

Sagitarii Auxilia are the most basic of missile troops of the Romuli. Pitiful stats, but I guess the arrows will help.....

Ah, here's the description for the First Banner.

Triarii would be rather solid spearmen. Spearmen generally receive penalties fighting against units with swords/axes/whatnot, but they can usually hold their own. They do hand cavalry their asses though, unless charged from behind.

Hoplites would be rather shitty spearmen. Outdated armor, weapons, and fighting styles. Still, they're free while acting as a garrison.

The Legio Caesarus would be the best sort of legionnaire the Romuli have to offer. Really high defense and they come equipped with pilum (javelins) that'll let them screw over units before the melee begins.

Regular Legionarii would be....well...your regular legionnaires. Solid infantry.

Legionarii Auxilia would be the poor man's legionnaire. Less armor and attack....but they're free since they're treated as a militia legionnaire of sorts?

Peronis Auxilia would not qualify as spearmen. Their spears are too short, so they'd be more of a light infantry. Still, they're free...and...probably suck.

Equites Sagitarii would be the horse archers of the Romuli....but their stats look pretty awful. Still, if you can shoot and you're highly mobile, why not? Horse archers are much more flexible in Medieval 2 and rome than they were in Empire and Shogun 2. Why? There's no retarded firing cone, and they can shoot 270 degrees around the unit.....and WHILE GALLOPING AT FULL SPEED

Equites Auxilia carry pila and swords. They hit much harder than the Equites Sagitarii, but have less ammo, less range.....etc.

Equites Lanciarii would qualify as lancer cavalry, I believe. In Medieval 2 cavalry usually charge with lances, but then switch over to swords once in a melee.

Bestiarii would be...a sword militia of sorts.

Retiarii would be...a counterpart to the triarii? They carry a trident rather than a spear....but they may charge without orders, which would be a a bit problematic.

Here's the finances....it's more detailed than Empire's since it shows me where all my money is coming from and going to.

[IGdood]

Out in the field, generals can build 2 types of structures.

Watchtowers serve to remove the fog of war. They can only be built in friendly territory, and it's best to build them at the borders or something. Given how big the regions are in this game, it's usually wise to build them everywhere.

Forts can be built in enemy territory as well as friendly territory. They provide a sort of makeshift wall and can be sieged, allowing an army to otherwise hold off superior numbers or just hold off until reinforcements arrive. However, they fall into disarray and go away from the map if not used for a turn.

Also, when out in the field, generals can hire mercenary units. The type of units available depends on the region you're walking in....and also on some sort of RNG that determines what units from that particular region pool are available. I can train Retiarii units fine. But here's a unit of Samnes, gladiators who use a sword instead of the trident.

Hm, looks like the faction leader is protected by these hardcore badasses. 21 defense? Shit man.

The settlement details tab shows as well as the factors that contribute to the numbers. It's pretty useful. I like the Empire one a bit more, since it seems...clearer....sorta.

When I get this Praetoriani Barracks up and running in Constantium I can roll out these elite troops. Yeah you thought the Legio Caesarus were elite? These guys are even better. Still, they follow the standard legionnaire formula. Tough as hell, low attack, but near-impervious to being shot.

Equites Praetorianii would be the elite cavalry. They're a far call from knights, that charge bonus of 3 is just pitiful for a cavalry unit. Still, they've got pila and a seriously high defense stat.

Princesses who don't get married off to another faction (or to your own non-royal family generals to increase their loyalty and make them of royal blood) will sometimes get betrothed by some person of a suitable stature. You can approve or disapprove of such a suitor. I say yes, because while he may be useless in commanding, a governor can always be useful.

The Faction Announcements message list will tell you stuff that's going on in your faction, such as who died, who got a retinue, who got born, who came of age, who got what......etc.

Alright, a diplomat. Now I can do some negotiating with my neighbors. I sent him to the west.

I'm treated to a nice little video of a marriage celebration.

Remember those subfactions I talked about? While they may have been lumped together as a generic "Rebel" faction, they've sent an army over. Time to conquer, FOR ROMULI.

The Council of Nobles have gave me a mission to go negotiate with the Uruk Dominion. (Orcs, lol) Well, I'm going to offer them trade rights....as soon as the diplomat gets there.

Be proud, be proud.

These rebels don't scare us, but check out the number of stars on that motherfucker!

While you decide on where to deploy your units, they will TAUNT the enemy, and since everything's in heavily-accented English (Romuli have Italian accents) some of the insults they hurl are just downright hilarious.

So infantry form an infantry line, since that's what legionnaires are for. My cavalry are on the sides, so at least when they start shooting they won't hit my own guys.

Meh, these rebels are mostly hoplites. Bah.

Enemy equites auxilia approaching, my own hurl their pila first.

Counterattack with our own javelins, legionnaires!

Taking a few casualties, but nothing major. Must be those big shields.

Meanwhile, the equites sagitarii (can I just call them horse archers? latin is kinda hard to spell and type out) fire their arrows.

Nice round shields. But I've got nicer tower shields. Your mohawks do not scare me. WE. ARE. LEGION. FORWARD.

their light cavalry, having run out of ammo, decide to charge my guys. Bad mistake. They were stabbed and chopped, and routed.

Is it just me or do the graphics of medieval 2 just seem a lot grittier? Empire just seemed so....bright, but that could be because of the uniforms.

I charge my own light cavalry into the fray, it only drops the hoplites' morale from eager to steady, so I withdraw them before they were slaughtered (spearmen are super effective against hoplites)

Since nobody is wearing super colorful uniforms, it's pretty hard to tell who's who.

I can't tell which cavalry belong to me! But I know I'm WINNING.

Winning the melee!

Since the melee is dragging along for quite awhile I decide to use my general to rout the enemy...time to gallop and circle around....

Buuuut, they rout without getting charged. I pursue and cut them down anyways.

Unlike Empire and Shogun 2, there are a few more things that happen during battle statistics.

The numbers inside the parantheses of casualties sustained are caused by friendly fire. Casualties healed are the number of men recovered from killing blows/shots. Prisoners caught are enemies "killed" whilst routing. They can then be released, ransomed, or executed. Releasing prisoners increases chivalry, whilst executing them increases dread. If the enemy doesn't pay for prisoners offered up for ransom, they will be executed without a dread increase. Taken Prisoner is your men taking prisoner if they get captured whilst routing.

Hm, a road. Maybe it'll lead me to a rebel settlement.

Scanning the area for mercenaries I find....SPARTANS.

Spartan Hoplites >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Hoplites. They're even considered "militia" status, not taking upkeep whilst garrisoned.

By the way, Schiltrom is an ability where the soldiers form a outward-facing circle so they don't receive penalties from being attacked from any side.

Spartan Swords are swordsmen with a decent defense and a rather high attack.

Spartan Archers, decent ranged units I suppose.

Spartan Cavalry. Despite looking badass, their stats kinda suck.

Ooh, a new family member.

Well, that road led me right to Heraclea. SIEGE.

Now you're probably wondering what are all these new icons that I've never seen before in Shogun 2 or Empire.

Starting from the left, you have battering ram, ladder, and siege tower. Each of those takes build points, which have an amount dependent on your army size. If the equipment you choose have a build point price exceeding that allotted to you, then it'll take more than 1 turn to build. Anyways....

Battering ram - useful only for knocking down gates and wooden walls.

Ladders - useful for getting tons of men onto the walls asap. Units carrying ladders can run.

Siege towers - Big and slow, siege towers allow your men to gather under a wall, somewhat protected, so when they charge on a wall most of the unit will get to it at once, offering a better numerical advantage.

I think I'll just starve this settlement out instead of going for an assault, They've got good troops.

My diplomat makes it over to the Uruk DOminion. We exchange tea, axes, trade agreements, and map information. The former two things were jokes.

The mission is a success.

Now with a Practice Range built (an upgrade to the Bowyer), I can train actual professional archers called Sagitarii.

The Flavian Ampitheater will allow me to train Uruk-Hai. You better know what that means. Backstory reason: The Uruk hai used to be enslaved by the Romuli, and many of them still are. Most of them have formed some Uruk Dominion though, which I just negotiated with.

The Knight's Stables is an upgrade to your usual Stables.

Time to gather a new army, this one doesn't have a general. So, they're led by a captain (in Empire I referred to them as a Brigadier)

Edited July 10, 2011 by skitarii

[IGdood]

When generals don't get married, sometimes they'll get married on their own. You have the final say, of course.

The Council of Nobles really wants me to keep going on and do negotiations. I'm cool with that.

Guilds pop up when you do something in the campaign that attracts their attention. Training cavalry units and building cavalry production buildings caused this one to pop up. Guilds are built instantly with your support and offer bonuses.

+1 experience is good.

Scouting with my priest, I find.....SPARTA!

Hello, pirates. I offer trade.

I find a Lao Che princess....but why did they use a picture of a Chinese Opera Singer as her portrait? Anyways, my emissary can only do one task per turn, so I can't negotiate with her.

Improving my economy.

The army I gather up earlier finds Sparta, and besieges it.

My priest finds a heretic. Let's try to burn this fucker, with a 33% chance of success.

Damn.

My priest, having failed hard, now has a trait called the Poor Prosecutor, which decreases what little piety he had in the first place. Repeatedly failing to denounce heretics may cause your priest to become a heretic himself, having been convinced that maybe what he learned isn't the right thing at all.

Gifts are always nice.

The Inquisition, probably having heard of my failure to denounce a heretic, decides to not like me. Wtf? They're Catholic, we Romuli worship the Sun God Mithras.

A Grand Temple looks like a nice thing to build.

How does art increase public health?

A Council Chambers will increase public order, something I don't need right now but it can be helpful in case it gets overcrowded.

The Circus Maximus will produce plenty of experienced cavalry units for us.

A market increases trade income, which in turn iis good thanks to my trade agreements.

Only 2 successful negotiations and this guy's skills have improved quite a lot!

Crop Rotation will increase my food production even more, keeping population high

My fleet has found another rebel settlement....time to mark it down.

Turns out it's Troy. Trojans?

Castles can be converted to a city, and vice versa. I need the extra income, not armies.

Off to Lao Che territory.

Why am I not surprised? Egypt vs. Crusader scenario.

An Inn is an upgrade to a Brothel, and I can train assassins from here.

I gathered up yet another army, but Troy is under siege by someone. Where to next?

So we are redirected to Messene, a city we kinda just...stumbled upon. SIEGE.

Diplomacy.

Alright, fine. I'll pay.

A Town Watch is the most basic of military buildings in a city.

And the Provincial Ampitheater allows training of those gladiators and bestiarii.

Messene will be ours by the next turn.

Hm, looks like Troy's besiegers retreated for some reason. I'll be conquering this one soon.

A Drill Square is...an upgrade to....uh...the Muster Hall in a Castle? Forgot.

Alright, let's take Messenes for the glory of the Empire!

EPIC ZOOM IN

Flavius delivers a one-liner.

TONIGHT, WE DINE, IN HEEELLLL!

So, they have the honor of pushing the siege tower around.

Spartan Archers rain fire arrows on my siege tower. Fire arrows do no damage to siege equipment, BUT if it catches fire, it's game over. Flaming arrows can also be used on troops, but they're less dangerous against troops (unlike Shogun 2) and do more morale damage than actual damage. This is realistic (Shogun 2 is not in its usage of flaming arrows)

Ladders to the walls!

[IGdood]

Fear not the hoplite, they're warriors from an outdated age.

And...siege tower broke? Aww man.

Well...let's get to a ladder...

DIE. DIE. DIE.

Retiarii have made it into the city.

The gate is ours, our other troops can walk in now.

What are those archers doing...? THROW PILA

And give chase!

Next stop, the city square.

They're gonna put up a last stand here. There's a reason why I like Medieval 2 siege assaults more than Empire ones....they're just more epic.

You are surrounded. You will die.

Give them nothing. But TAKE FROM THEM, EVERYTHING!

And our soldiers give thanks to Mithras, the Sun God.

The Grain Exchange is a predecessor to the Market. I can't believe Messene has practically no buildings in it.

But, I can train Spartans at will though! Epic win!

Moving on to Troy.

The Thieves' Guild seems to like me for some reason.

A Barka Sultanate army has been located near Troy. I got to it first, suckers!

The Spartans sally out. It's their last night. Now they'll really be dining in hell.

In a sally in medieval 2, you don't get a chance to deploy.

Legio Caesaris, I really love that armor.

Horse archers, open fire!

Lance cavalry, CHARGE their archers!

A few of the Spartan hoplites run back to try and get my cavalry, but I withdraw them so not too many of them get killed.

Flank attack? Flank attack.

Bloodstains? Yes. Grimdark? Kind of.

Easily defeated. Your days of greatness are over, Spartans. Perhaps under the ROmuli Empire you may get your chance to shine again.

Your general lies in a bloody heap.

It was an honorable battle, I occupy the settlement. Oh yeah, I didn't explain this before.

When you conquer a settlement, you'll get three choices: Occupy, Sack, and exterminate.

Occupy nets you a minimal amount of cash.

Sack damages buildings but nets you a lot of money.

Exterminate kills off most of the populace, increases your dread by a lot, and sends public order sky high (less overcrowding and people are scared of you. Very scared.)

The Master Thieves' Guild upgrade offers itself to me in Messene.

The Shipwright is an upgrade to the Dock. It'll be good for sea trade.

A short video that I made of that siege of Messene.

Here you can see things more smoothly and....well...you can hear battle chatter and the sounds are MUCH better than in Empire. Shogun 2's sounds are pretty good though!

[IGdood]

Well we've made trade agreements with the factions here on this island, let's move into the next one....got a fleet coming over to pick our diplomat up.

The Merchant's Wharf is a building separate from the dock line; it serves purely to increase naval trade, not in producing naval units.

Looks like everyone's starting to war!

A mission to blockade a rebel port. Sure, let's do that.

This is a spy. He'll detect other agents if he's good enough and will also cause unrest if he manages to get into a settlement. Otherwise, gathers information.

Now with that Praetoriani barracks built I can finally train Praetoriani.

These are Ballista. It seems that they only hurt troops, not walls and gates. That's fail right there, although I suppose they have their uses....

Ion Hades. That's a pretty badass name!

Our diplomat Legio Galba has made it to the other island, and the Tahar Caliphate exchange map info and money and trade agreements.

New additions to the royal family can also be made via random events such as adoptions.

I can always use a governor, he's going to Heraclea.

The blockade mission is a success, and I get a prize that I don't really care much about.

Ion Hades' first mission results in a disaster as he is...killed.

With that new arena complete I can now train Uruk Hai. Well, they're...gladiatorial slaves of sorts....hahha. Sure, they come in a small unit size but they have some pretty high attack power and 2 HP!

Okay....moving on to the next nation for trade agreements...

As I march my armies into Uruk Land, it's no surprise they're not happy about it. Well, it's time to expand west I say, and put these savages into the gladiator fights we love to watch!

Let's check out the mercen--WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS!?

I thought I had the weird name of SkitarII. Now this is the reptarii. They seem pretty decent.....

Oh wow, a dog unit. These look interesting.

Troy falls, which is a good thing. As you can see, my treasury is going down from all that construction I'm doing.

Now what's that army doing over here?

It's official. We're at war with the Uruk Dominion now. I lay siege.

Another adopted kid? It's off to Constantium for you.

The Ducado refuse a trade agreement. Bastards.

Spying on a random force ( I trained another spy), wow....this guy is pretty much fail. I wonder why he hasn't rebelled yet.

Time to siege assault, but I'll stop for tonight. Gotta sleep. =)

[Parrhesia]

A stuffed olive holds more influence than this man. It could choke someone important and change history.

[Rewjeo]

THAT GENERAL IS SO GOOD

So, what ARE those reptarii?

Edit: Oh, I figured out that my computer can actually run Rome Total War! So I'll have a TW game to play and actually understand what you're doing better. Well, assuming I can find a copy of it locally. 18-26 business days for shipping is, well, not good. Edit 2: I GOT STEAM TO WORK. I have to steal my neighbors' internet, but it works! Downloading now. It will be done between two and a half hours from now and 34 hours from now

Edited July 10, 2011 by Rewjeo

[Parrhesia]

I've had better. I've sent a man who's only trait was Ugly in a suicide run through Macedonia (he became my best general) and an insane faction heir to die in Gaul (he ... didn't).

[IGdood]

A stuffed olive holds more influence than this man. It could choke someone important and change history.

LOL! Yes.

THAT GENERAL IS SO GOOD

So, what ARE those reptarii?

Edit: Oh, I figured out that my computer can actually run Rome Total War! So I'll have a TW game to play and actually understand what you're doing better. Well, assuming I can find a copy of it locally. 18-26 business days for shipping is, well, not good. Edit 2: I GOT STEAM TO WORK. I have to steal my neighbors' internet, but it works! Downloading now. It will be done between two and a half hours from now and 34 hours from now

Yes...he's....I dunno...which general are you referring to?

I think they're like...reptiles...or something. I have no idea, but I hired a few since they have good morale. And good job ordering Rome Total War, hope you have fun playing as....Iunno...Greeks, Romans, Barbarians? Hahahahha.......

I've had better. I've sent a man who's only trait was Ugly in a suicide run through Macedonia (he became my best general) and an insane faction heir to die in Gaul (he ... didn't).

Seems like the more we want to get rid of something, the harder they cling to us....

And I'm kinda surprised nobody's claiming units. I guess the Romuli's style of fighting isn't to your tastes? I really love watching the enemy act like little children on a tantrum trying to smash down a reinforced steel wall. And being near-immune to missile weapons is a plus.

Anyway, update.

I thought this loading screen had an appropriate message. Demos is the capital of the Uruk Dominion, I think.

Siege towers will go for the front, ladders at the side. May the best man win. Oh wait, I have superior numbers, ha!

These guys got some serious scary faces going on. I'd advise for some facial reconstruction

Well, that siege tower didn't make it. Let's grab a spare.

Uruk Hai slaves ahainst their Uruk Hai. Alright.

I wonder whose blood is splattering that guy's shield.

Bone-faced dudes with robes? Hairy werewolf men called the Ly Kan? KILL THE MUTANT, PURGE THE UNCLEAN.

This gate is taking awhile to go down, and I don't feel like grabbing anymore spare siege towers.

Some units have an officer leading them. They have I think.... 3 HP more than the regular soldier of that unit. And he is not pleased.

Hoplites? What are regular humans doing serving these beastmen?!

SURPRISE

"Oi, hurry the fuck up!"

"Shut up, you're not the ones having boiling oil poured on them!"

Towers on gates and walls will shoot at your troops if enemy infantry are nearby to man them. Of course, if you wrest control by killing off the enemy, then the towers will then train their arrows on your enemies.

The gates are smashed,, finally, time to go capture the town square.

The town square being all the way.....inside the castle/town.

The last few Ly Kan are wiped off the walls.

Just keep on marching.

These guys look a bit tough.

And the battle is on! It takes about 1-2 minutes just to see one of those bodyguards die.

The thing is it also takes that amount of time to see one of my own guys die!

The Praetoriani show up, in all their awesome cloak/capes.

Fatigue sets in.

I win by countdown, not by killing every last uruk in there.

Time for ransom!

And they don't pay, thus I'm greeted by the sounds of horses galloping and limbs being torn from torsos. Oh, there's also much blood dripping and screaming. Medieval 2 is a LOT more grimdark than Empire and Shogun 2.

So, Epirus belongs to us now...

A Uruk princess requests a ceasefire. I flick her off.

My other army is lead to Demos, the capital of the Uruk Dominion. I plan to starve it out.

Mission failed for the diplomacy, as the Ducado refuse to a trade agreement with me.

Going north to Hades, I left a few units in Epirus.

When Castles hit a certain population level they can be upgraded to Fortresses.

The Ducado accept the agreement.....after I fail the mission.

Hades falls quickly. Yeah, I autoresolved.

Unfortunately Gaius Caesar, our faction leader, has been severely wounded. Ow.

[IGdood]

Previously on Thera Total War, our mighty legions have made camp outside Demos, and now they're attacking us. To war with these savages! Funnily enough, the general attacking me went for a night battle, thus denying most of his reinforcements the whole point of night battles is to deny reinforcements, both your own and your enemies' (unless they have night battle traits too).

I know enemy reinforcements will hit me from behind, so I put my shitty troops (the non-legionnaires) to hold the line back there. Everyone else will hold the front.

This battle should be pretty straightforwar---WHOA WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WHAAAAAT THIS IS THERA NOT SACRED STONES HOLY WHAT SHITTING FUCKS WHAT!?

This screenshot looks rather normal compared to those...flying...gargoyle...clawed....things.

Really like that my legionnaires carry pila.

And since they're on the hill they get a massive range boost.

Those flying creatures rip through my legionnaires SORTA, but that's still pretty impressive considering that most of the foes I've faced so far can barely put a dent in my legionnaires. Shit, it takes quite awhile to drop one of these fuckers. Pictured: A legionnaire performs a finishing move on one of them. He stabbed the thing in the chest and as it knelt down he slashed the neck.

Time to move my free soldiers to the flanks. There they shall unload their pila and then charge.

Seeing that many legionnaire corpses is a little disturbing.

Despite watching tons of pila fly into those bodyguards, only like...3 dropped dead. The rest just flinched, bled a bit, and kept on fighting.

Dude, why the fuck are you still fighting?!

Some annoying as hell arquebusiers keep shooting my legionnaires. I return the favor with showers of pila.

After awhile it seems that the main attack force has been beaten, now it's time to go to the corner to fight the last bits of enemies, who seem to be not moving towards me.

Blegh.

The humans of Demos are basically humans who live within the Uruk Dominion. The Romuli hate them a LOT, because 1. They worship the goddess Callisto (and the other Greek gods) instead of the Sun god Mithras. And 2. They sided with these beasts.

For some reason, I don't expect these Bestarii to live very long, even though I've upgraded them to wear leather armor. (They used to wear cloth)

Mithras save us, it's the hounds! And yes, dogs actually kicked these guy's asses. SHAME ON YOU.

My hoplites proceed to get chopped up by the uruk Hai, but not the Samnes. They managed to hold their own....to some extent.

The Retiarii....not so much. They're spearmen, and are at an advantage fighting dogs and other infantry.

I charge in my ammoless horse archers and they proceed to cut up the enemy archers pretty well.

Whereas my Equites Lanciarii manage to fight a spot where they could charge into the enemy, which they do a great job with.

These guys are not going to die easily. What.

Try to ignore messages about "Only half the enemy force remains.' They pop up for every enemy army involved in a battle, so it can be a bit misleading.

The enemy general finally dies, poked to death by a few remaining angry hoplites.

Romuli cavalry are actually pretty okay staying in melee after charging.

I decide to take a look at the details of the enemy bodyguard unit. Pretty impressive attack, their defense matches my legionnaire's elite, and....it's the 2 hitpoints that gives my men so much trouble. That....and 20 defense is very good compared to the legionnaire's pitiful melee attack.

I win, but I'm a bit disappointed to see that I've lost more men than I've killed. Well if you count legionnaires only...then maybe the numbers even up a bit better....

Since I'm neither chivalric or dreadful, I offer the prisoners for ransom.

Guess not.

Ah yes then I proceeded to siege Demos, but they sally out the next turn.

Drop the rams and ladders, let's make a defensive formation.

I spy an enemy general shouting orders.

Ha, they send their hoplites in to absorb Pila (aka dying).

Oi, ignore the hoplites....it's the Uruk Hai you're worried about!

My men hold their positions and fight it out with the other forces.

Well actually it's not like there's a lot of enemies anyways...

That poor legionnaire took a big axe-sword smash in the shoulder, but still he fights. After he's done grimacing and flinching.

Alright, you auxiliary legionnaires, you might not be actual real professionals, but you can take out that guy right? Yes? Good.

Another general bites the dust from the arrows of my Equites Sagitarii.

Edited July 11, 2011 by skitarii

[IGdood]

With the other forces taken care of, I can move my line to face the incoming remaining enemies.

WE READY.

As the enemy come in somewhat disorganized I pretty much tell my formation to screw it. Everyone just charge. Cavalry will go after their archers.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the battlefield my auxiliaries are STILL hacking away at the Uruk Gan Bodyguard.

You cannot stand up to the might of my legions, men of Demos!

Cavalry, there's your opening. CHARGE!

Run, you cowards!

And it's a win, with a more favorable kill ratio.

NIGHTMARE FUEL. THIS IS WHAT THE REPTARII LOOK LIKE UP CLOSE

I go for extermination, simply because I felt evil for a minute.

Meanwhile, the Faustian Reich accept a trade agreement from me.

Unit rewards? Well, looks like I can send them to reinforce the border provinces.

Muahahahahaha

Next region to conquer.....Phobos!

I also discover new mercenaries....not sure if they'll be popular with you guys. I didn't hire them yet.

A missile attack of 10 packs a huge punch. They've got some sort of defense, and the 2 HP will ensure they'll be pretty hard to kill for a ranged unit. However, being at only 60 soldiers max, that's....not too good. However, they can hide anywhere and their javelins can fuck over armor (beware, legionnaires!)

Aww man, he wasn't that old!

Well, we got a new leader--HOLY SHIT HIS NAME IS JULIUS CAESAR. As he is not crowned yet I'll wait a turn before i can move him.

His stats....at best, are quite noobish, except for his Command.

Wow, has this army been here for all this time? Seems kinda suspicious.

My army makes its way to Phobos. Julius Caesar will be heading along to take command.

Suddenly, he got a bit less badass.

Time to introduce more buildings that I can build now.

The Military Stables doesn't do things differently compared to the Knight's Stables, aside from giving me more of a unit to recruit. Okay, that was badly worded, I should explain unit recruitment for Medieval 2 a bit more. So basically you have a pool of units that are available when you recruit. Like I want to recruit more legionnaires, but at most there are probably only 2 legionnaire units ready in a region. After recruiting 2 of them, I have to wait sometime until the pool is "filled" back up again. This really limits the rate at which you can recruit units. Improving your military buildings usually increases the maximum capacity of the pool.

The Armourer building unlocks the mail armor upgrade for certain units. Units can be retrained and refitted with better armor to help buff defense.

The Shipwright improves naval trade and increases the galley pool from 1 to 2.

The Irrigation improvement is the final upgrade to the farming buildings.

Looks like war is brewing elsewhere on the continent.

The army at Phobos was ordered to withdraw a bit, and some reinforcements have joined up with it (not Julius though)

Hmm, looks like we've got some things to improve on.

One of my princesses discover a rogue settlement. I'll make this my next one after Phobos.

Public Baths seem like a good thing to build. I can avoid plagues by improving hygiene.

More mercenaries!

Reptarii Arcebusarii. Other than packing a firearm with some punch, there isn't much to say about these guys.

Ly Kan Archers seem to be pretty damn powerful.

Unfortunately I can't afford them, so I settle with spying on the enemy army. I should beware of these guys, as their crossbows fire fucking explosive rockets.

Well, let's get rid of this obstacle.

Julius asserts himself as faction leader with a one-liner. I wouldn't be calling the Uruk as mere rogues, good caesar,

Forward!

Explosive rockets hit my lines, which....well....my legionnaires can't exactly block...

My archers fire back with their arrows. Unfortunately, they were using fire arrows, which did jack shit. I switched back to regular arrows.

[IGdood]

YOU AGAIN.

Fucking rockets, fucking Ly Kan crossbows and their 2 HP making it that much harder to kill them.

Of course, with Julius and his huge bodyguard he can now go out and kick serious asses.

And with an accompanying unit of Equites Praetoriani what COULD go wrong?

Angry Uruk Gan chasing after us, that's what.

GTFO, GTFO.

Yes, they chopped up THAT much of my cavalry.

Meanwhile, I have the upper hand in my infantry battle.

You bone-faced Scream wannabes! DIE.

A cavalry charge sent those suckers routing.

Annnnd it's a win.

Annnnd Phobos is next. For reals, this time.

Ah, it seems like the Native Americans are at each others throats.

Ha.

Men of Romuli, today, we stand here against a might bastion of the Uruk Dominion. Many years ago, in the time of Nero Caesar, legions of our bravest warriors were defeated by the Uruk at this place. Now, let us deliver our revenge. ROMULI VICTORIA.

Bright day. I had my legionnaires use their Shield Wall ability. Shield wall basically tightens up your formation and makes them more resistant to getting charged.

I'd like to see them break through my shield wall.

Being on upper ground is awesome. Too bad in Empire and Shogun 2 the game engine is designed such that being on higher ground doesn't affect range.

SHINY.

Bullets? Against my shield wall!?

Okay, so focusing fire does do quite a lot of damage. But I've got pila hurling at you!

Annnnd combat is joined, with enemy reinforcements coming in from the flanks.

Well, looks like some of them are routing.....

I let my Uruk Hai give chase...I've got other things to focus on.... (yes, they're quite expendable)

How'd my Reptarii Spearmen get all the way out here? Ah well, they're a lost cause.

My Spartan Archers get caught by Uruk Gan....and they're being slaughtered. My other infantry seem to be...uh... where are they again?

Ah yes, cavalry are busy cutting down ranged units who are pretty much everywhere.

2 HP doesn't do jack shit against a powerful cavalry charge from the rear.

My archers are out of ammo. So...everyone pull out your sword and get in there!

Amazingly enough, they took out one of the Uruk captains.

Seriously, there are enemy ranged units all over this battlefield.

I love it when cavalry charges send people flying. My exhausted legionnaires were fighting this bunch to a standstill, but just one charge changed all that.

Here's the last mob of enemy infantry I gotta rout, I think.

Now's not the time to be shaken up, Praetoriani....

I swear if I see one more fucking archer....

Run, you subhumans. RUN. DIE.

Still eager, eh? I'll commend you lot for that.

Still eager? STILL EAGER? Authority Equals Asskicking, Julius practically saved his whole army with all the cavalry charging. And yes, I do see that most of my troops are at dangerously low levels.

[IGdood]

Annnnd we are victorious, but barely. All thanks to our Caesar, we won.

Well, now Phobos is practically undefended....but i need soldiers. A unit of Spartan Swords should be good enough.

Meanwhile, the emissary makes his way to Sycorax territory.

I thought this mission was very funny. Gotta marry my princess off to one of my generals, it seems.

Meanwhile, the Christian factions call a crusade on one of the muslim settlements somewhere up north.

I didn't autoresolve this one. I thought this was the Uruk Dominion's last province and I wanted to kill people personally.

RAM THOSE GATES OPEN. GIVE ME BACK MY LEGIONS.

Fast forward, ram slams gate open, SLAUGHTER THEM ALL.

LAST STAAAAND

SPAAARTANS. THIS. IS. PHOBOOOOOSSS

You cannot stand up to Julius and hos bodyguards. Surrender, suckers!

And with the last Orc dead, we celebrate.

Then it turns out Phobos wasn't their last settlement. Well, damn. Anyways, here's some info on their buildings...it seems they have quite an approach to making warriors....

A mining network will get you more money than a regular mine.

The Praetoriani headquarters will get you the best infantry unit the Romuli can field. I'll let you guys figure out the unit from its name.

Applause to the Christians, it seems their crusade worked.

Ha, he only sends me 3 Auxilia Legionarii.

Unlike Empire and Shogun 2, units don't replenish on their own in medieval 2. You need to take them to a settlement where they can be retrained...that is the unit pool has that particular unit available and the correct facilities are there. Waiting for the chance to retrain is a pain. And since castle units probably can't be retrained in cities and vice versas, it'll make sense to have a fair mix of castles and cities as you conquer along the map.

Annnnd i discover more mercenaries.

The Ly Kan would make for pretty good shock troops, although that small unit size of 60 isn't that great. Still, I guess having 2 HP makes them 120 soldiers in theory, but still.... Armor-piercing is always good, and frightening enemies is also good, although that doesn't do shit to elite units.

Alright, let's move down to that rebel castle. I'm thinking of turning it into a city when I'm done with it.

Why not?

A Warehouse is an upgrade to the merchant's Wharf....did I say that already?

It seems I've entered a new region of mercenaries. Seriously.

Looking at stats alone, Sumari Horse Archers are....well....utter shit. They'll die in a heartbeat if they're threatened, but I guess the key is that they're horse archers and that's it.

And I thought Sumari Horse Archers were bad, but their Sumari Foot Archers are even worse. Okay, they have 1 more in missile attack...but...the only thing they have going for them is that they're cheap as dirt.

Now this is more like it. These tough fuckers look like they can do a better job than my Equites Lanciarii. Hired.

Heeeey, don't these guys look like the Shimazu Katana Samurai Facebeaters from my Shogun 2 LP? Hired. If nobody claims these guys, I'll be pretty surprised.

High attack, their defense is pretty high (they'll die pretty fast to ranged attacks though), and what's better is that they come in a group of 150. Most good units come in a group of only 120. 30 extra men can mean the difference between a victory and defeat. Plus, they're ARMOR PIERCING and they have GOOD STAMINA. HIRED OF COURSE.

Mondii Axemen....ah what the hell, the Qin Ronin kick your asses any day. You're not that much cheaper, and the only thing you have going for you is a combat bonus in snow. Well, it doesn't snow down here. You're more fail than Garcia.

Elephants? Elephants. HIRED.

Rocket Launchers? I'll....hire you another time. (By the way, they kicked major asses in Medieval 2.)

Mondas is under siege. Looks like they have elephants too. Luckily I've got spearmen. They have a better time fighting elephants than anyone else. Cavalry suck balls against elephants. Actually, wait, javelins are super effective, and I got legionnaires. EEeeeh, easy.

Long update. That's all for tonight. XD

[IGdood]

4 long posts and no feedback? I'm surprised. Or is it because today's Monday? :D

[Rewjeo]

Well, I've been playing Rome. I'd like to claim a unit, but I don't know which ones I want...

Also, did you look at those flying things' stats? And can you train them now since you have Uruk buildings?

[IGdood]

Well, I've been playing Rome. I'd like to claim a unit, but I don't know which ones I want...

Also, did you look at those flying things' stats? And can you train them now since you have Uruk buildings?

There's just so many huh? XD Or are you looking for a religious unit or something? hahahahaa....

And I did look up those flying things later on after I posted.

Apparently they're called Mahisha or something, and they have somewhere around 13/16 (can't remember the exact number) attack, and 20 defense, and 3 HP. Unfortunately, they're a Uruk Dominion only unit, and the Uruk Buildings only let me train Sagitarii/Legionarii/etc.

And how's Rome going for you? Good? Did you patch it before playing? Gets rid of bugs.

[Rewjeo]

There's just so many huh? XD Or are you looking for a religious unit or something? hahahahaa....

Yeah, there certainly are a lot. And I'm really not religious... at all.

And I did look up those flying things later on after I posted.

Apparently they're called Mahisha or something, and they have somewhere around 13/16 (can't remember the exact number) attack, and 20 defense, and 3 HP. Unfortunately, they're a Uruk Dominion only unit, and the Uruk Buildings only let me train Sagitarii/Legionarii/etc.

3 HP? Yeah, that would explain it. I mean, 13-16 attack and 20 defense is a good unit, but with 3HP? Yikes.

And how's Rome going for you? Good? Did you patch it before playing? Gets rid of bugs.

Good. I'm playing easy since it's the first time I've played TW, and, well, it's very easy. I have an absurd amount of money (~100,000, 4-8,000 in profits when I don't go on a building/recruiting spree) despite only owning northern Italy and most of modern France and funding at least 4 defensive units per garrison (more like 8-10 in the French areas) two full stacks, one of which is a very elite stack, and constantly building everything everywhere- although my recent blitz through Briton France means that I have enough cities I can't do that anymore. I went on a building spree and lost 80,000 denarii that turn... Four turns later, I was back in sextuple digits, and I won't have to spend money on buildings until the queue finishes somewhere. But I've finally found a garrison with a full stack in it! That will probably actually be a tough battle since you don't control your reinforcements, although my guess is my troops are of higher quality. I dread taking over the other Romans, though. For a long time they basically stayed in Italy, with a little headway northwest of Greece. In the last ten turns, they have conquered all of Greece/Macedon/Thrace/etc. and are now on Turkey with several very large armies.

I got it through Steam, so it should be fully updated.

[IGdood]

Yeah, there certainly are a lot. And I'm really not religious... at all.

Good. I'm playing easy since it's the first time I've played TW, and, well, it's very easy. I have an absurd amount of money (~100,000, 4-8,000 in profits when I don't go on a building/recruiting spree) despite only owning northern Italy and most of modern France and funding at least 4 defensive units per garrison (more like 8-10 in the French areas) two full stacks, one of which is a very elite stack, and constantly building everything everywhere- although my recent blitz through Briton France means that I have enough cities I can't do that anymore. I went on a building spree and lost 80,000 denarii that turn... Four turns later, I was back in sextuple digits, and I won't have to spend money on buildings until the queue finishes somewhere. But I've finally found a garrison with a full stack in it! That will probably actually be a tough battle since you don't control your reinforcements, although my guess is my troops are of higher quality. I dread taking over the other Romans, though. For a long time they basically stayed in Italy, with a little headway northwest of Greece. In the last ten turns, they have conquered all of Greece/Macedon/Thrace/etc. and are now on Turkey with several very large armies.

I meant...since you seem intent on establishing a cult of Rewjeo.....like the religious warrior monks in Shogun 2. heheheheh. The Praetoriani troops seem to be linked to religion, since the building that produces them is itself required by a Great Temple to Mithras....strangely enough. Or maybe not so strange, seeing as their defense is so high.

Yeah you get money bonuses in easy, I think. Still, you're doing a good job with the blitzing and keeping garrisons to a minimum. Fighting the other Romans will be the hardest since Roman troops are some of the best statswise around, but you'll pull through with experienced units and better tactics.

Update time!

Previously, I was sieging Mandos, a castle-settlement owned by the Sumari peoples.

Their archers immediately draw first blood by shooting my Axemen. Smart choice, they're the ones without shields and without much armor.

I forgot if I ever took a pic of the Triarii in-game but here they are.

That, my friends, is how the Qin Ronin look like. They look a bit more badass than the Katana Samurai from Shogun 2....

And this is what the Sumari Elephant Archers look like.

Looks like they've got their own, but I've got spearmen.

Those archers didn't stand a chance as soon as the axemen reached the walls.

The Reptarii....however, kept falling off the broken wall that they climbed....so i told them to just go back down....and they did...literally.

This is what the Mancu Warlords look like in-game.

Alright Axemen, let's see how you fare against these elephants.

Quite a few of them are shot to death by the archers on the elephants as they ran up there.

They were gored by tusks and shot by rocket launchers somewhere behind the elephants, and they flee.

While the triarii do a much better job against the elephants, although a few were crushed by falling elephant bodies.

Although since they're spearmen, they had a tough time fighting heavy infantry like these Mancu Warriors.

I smack you with my spear, bitch!

Mondas is ours, but first I will convert it to a town....I can use the money.

So, I can recruit Mancu Warriors now. They're like legionnaires, except their attacks ignore armor most of the time since they use maces.

Finally, the English and French are at each others' throats.

Uh oh, a plague has struck Constantium..... They usually occur if health isn't good enough...or you just got unlucky. Units coming out of a plagued settlement can infect another settlement if they walk into it. One useful strategy would be to train a spy in a plagued settlement, then send him into an enemy settlement! I move my governor out of there, lest he die of sickness!

Well, let's try to kill off the last Uruk settlement.....move out....

Hm, the Ly Kan Crossbows finally showed up in the mercenary pool..... Rocket-propelled crossbow bolts are always interesting.

I do hope Mancu is their last province. I want to fight someone new.

The epic ridiculousness of this unit is just....over 9000. Praetoriani Arcebusarii. It's like....handing guns to legionnaires.....but they only have 61 men in their unit.

My spies have the gates open, but there's another large uruk army right beside Julius' army, so I don't want to go for a siege assault, since enemy units will rout into the settlement when defeated and get infinite morale int he town square. Knowing just how long the Uruk can last in a fight, I don't want to risk such casualties.

Oh, and and a Fairground is an upgrade to the Market.

And true enough, the Uruk army attacks. However, they go for a night battle, which cuts off their reinforcements. They really think they can defeat me?

You might have noticed that I brought a few big toys to the battlefield. These are catapults, they can fire regular stones or flaming ammo. Flaming ammo is more inaccurate, but it's not like they were accurate in the first place; it does more damage and burns units that touches the flying flaming rock before exploding.

YOUR 2 HP ARE USELESS.

A few flaming arrows won't do shit to my elephants. try harder.

Lighting up the night sky, and letting the pungent smell of sizzlin' flesh fill the air.

Hmm, looks like they hired some axemen too.

And trying to hit me from all sides.

FEAR THE KATANA, URUK GAN.

Some of the reinforcements were pure archer, and they were wiped out.

I let the elephants have their fun, tossing foes around with their tusks.

Elephants don't do friendly fire if you charge them into a mix of your own soldiers and the enemy's. Okay, there might be a few, but most of the time the enemy will be tossed to his death, while your own guys will be tossed around, but stunned.

Gallop-by stabbing.

[IGdood]

Somehow the Spartan Archers manage to get themselves into melee combat.

The Qin Ronin held their ground pretty well, and are currently being relieved by a cavalry charge. heheh.

A heroic victory, you don't get many of those. If the army was led by a captain, there'd be a chance he'll be "Man of the Hour", and therefore allowed to promote to general status.

Wow, the catapults took out plenty of units. The Qin Ronin did pretty well considering most of the time they were fighting Uruk Gan Bodyguards as well as some hoplites.

With the Uruk army defeated, now I can siege assault with only a garrison to deal with.

Good.

Most of our enemies will be this.

Some annoying Uruk Hai were at the gates manning the towers. A storm of Pila shut them up.

Then came the long, masssacre-em-all at the square fight.

I was watching this legionnaire take out a Urak Gan by himself. Impressive. He died later on though.

Things were going pretty slow, but Julius got impatient and threw himself into the fray.

Mancu belongs to us now!

Turns out the Uruk Dominion still wasn't defeated yet. They still had Gindarus.

My spy dies of old age after he passes by Gindarus.

Well, time to bring my army over. I leave behind a few units, I add a few other units...

The League of Privateers declare war on me...well more like they blockaded one of my ports without warning. Well, it's nice to have a new enemy to fight.

One of my new priests is secretly a woman.

Remember the troops here? They got replenished on Constantium and are on their way back with a few additions. In Medieval 2, retraining troops does not cause them to lose experience levels.

Gindarus was conquered, and the Uruk are no more. Now to turn our attention to the privateers.

Julius dies of old age......meh, he was good too.

Our new faction leader sucks. I'll train up a younger general.

Consul Tullius is young and the faction heir. He finds several new mercenaries as he enters privateer territory.

Feroz Eixos look better than the Rondii Axemen on paper. I mean, 7 armor is pretty high for a two-hander unit. Still, their stats leave some things to be desired, but they're effective against cavalry and armor, which should make up for the numbers.

Hispanicas Espadas look like any swordsmen unit......not required.

These privateers have constructed a fort. Time to siege!

They beg for mercy, and I refuse. They were the ones who started this transgression,and they will suffer a severe lesson.

You think being all yargh har har is cool? Well shut up, cause you about to be sunk by the Romuli military machine.

By the way the Privateers have British accents on the campaign map.

I'll have my Feroz Exios ram the gates and wooden walls. Everyone else will fight off the reinforcements first.

Hm, colorful Renaissance clothing.

The rams get the job done.

Some Buccaneers rush out. I didn't expect much out of the axemen...

Surprisingly, I think it must be the armor-piercing, but the axemen are winning!

These arquebusiers are unarmored and are vulnerable to our arrows!

Ow. Those bullets actually hurt my legionnaires.

These gunpowder weapons are quite short-ranged...so let's move up a bit so we can get inside pila range.

Heheheheheh.

With the gunners defeated, I quickly charge my men forward!

[IGdood]

And here the Consul himself is dealing with the Royal Renaissance Bodyguard of the Privateers. CAesarian Bodyguards only have 6 attack. The Renaissanceguys have 12. (longer swords, more advanced technology). Still, with the Mancy Warlords charging, they didn't stand a chance.

Yes, I had a dog unit. I set the hounds loose into the garrison and focused my attention elsewhere.

That admiral is one we won't be seeing again.

The hounds killed this many enemies before dying. Holy shit.

Some enemy infantry try to break out, but I've got more than enough soldiers to stop this.

Heheheh, I've got my own elite gunners.

Slice, stab, chop.

The second privateer general dies from charging Spartan Hoplites.

Alright, enough fun and games. RUN IN THERE AND KILL 'EM ALL!

The Privateers held their ground, especially with pikemen.... I hate fighting pikemen. No matter what the numbers say, they are nearly impossible to defeat from up front since their weapons have a very long reach.

Well, things are better with fire support.

And they're firing back at us!

The spearmen find a way to flank.

The last few enemy gunners shoot at my melee troops as they close in....

Pretty colorful, huh?XD

Meanwhile, i circle my gunner Praetoriani around and have them shoot at...whatever.

And we win. No settlement, this is just a fort.

[Rewjeo]

Yeah, money's not a problem. Did I mention all of my provinces are at Low Taxes? But the Britons and the Germans have conquered insane amounts of land. The Brutii are doing really well, now, too. Egypt seems to be doing really well, too, seeing as the most advanced and largest faction reports keep alternating between the two of us...

See, I think I know which units I'd like to claim, but I need names...

[Parrhesia]

Ah, the Man of the Hour...

That reminds me of Prince Paul Spill. I sent out a random unit of light cavalry to kill a couple of catapults. Cue Man of the Hour. The guy seemed decent enough, he was a couple of Command Stars and a governor usually helps. And when the King died...he became the new Faction Heir. I don’t know why this happened, but there it is.

Paul Spill tragically died when, while reinforcing some other idiot, the AI charged him into a regiment of pikemen.