Mekkah Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 Since this is a translation patch and since I'm not Paperblade it might not be as funny, but that doesn't mean it won't be worth reading. Verdane is pretty bad at this conquering thing. YOU CAN SEIZE NOW GANDOLF. HURRY UP. Too late. You can't. The "sortie" option is greyed out. And so is the "alive" option. It's so easy acting knightly when you don't actually have a choice at all. Oh, and why did he say "us"? Who else is there and why aren't they outside? People from Jungby make no sense. Maybe Chalphy knows where it's at. Sigurd is so modest. And rude to his knights. That would destroy the EXP rank. NO NOISH YOU WILL RUIN SIGURD'S ENEMY PHASE EXPOSURE Damn straight. Good luck with that. Not only can they walk 30 spaces before the battle starts, and are they closer to the villages than you, but they can STAND ON CLIFFS! I recommend firing Oifaye until Gen 2 starts. Caesar wasn't very good at perceiving who would backstab him. You know who else isn't? So now they discuss that they have to protect their base, because... It's true. This is why you need to make sure your "Army" stat is empty. It means you don't vanish automatically whenever your castle changes color. Yeah, why me? My portrait doesn't even fit in the frame! Yeah, fuck you Alec. We're doing this my way. Who's slow now, punk? Meanwhile, at Jungby... "Sorry boss, we couldn't, there was a Warrior standing on the seize square." Criticaling with 47% hit when the game mechanics wouldn't even allow you to critical at all is an okay way to make up for incompetence. He shall have much "fun" interrogating her later. He never actually goes to the field again, he just sends Kinbois and his men. Except, you know, Alvis, who as far as everyone knows is handling the King's affairs right now. Aideen can moonwalk. Gandolf doesn't even know how to do that, so he's jealous. Verdane is serious business. They can kill (and as you'll see later, create) bridges. With their axes. Also, that's Kinbois. I checked. tmi Gandolf agrees. Don't worry, Aideen, your Lord is well on his way to, er, instill some decency alright. Gandolf knows, and doesn't want to be here when Sigurd arrives. And here I thought the whole point of looting was to take goods for yourself. He should take a look at London. Ardan is on his way as well. These axes are like swiss army knives. They can set shit on fire. And getting away with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mekkah Posted August 17, 2011 Author Share Posted August 17, 2011 Seriously, don't let Sigurd hear you. I really love the FE4 translation patch. Azel figures the town was already being set on fire anyway. How's that new job going for you, Alec? Just what I ordered: more horses. Even if Ethlin knew that Azel had come as well, she would be correct. Azel can't keep up with Sigurd. Hint hint. Fin is in a hurry. Since Sigurd and Noish completely forgot, Ardan decides he'll do the village saving himself. He's a multi tasker. The "___ conquered" message only has room for 4 letters. This always amused me, particularly in certain later castles. CONSCRIPTED! Midir never actually said if he was okay or not. My Aideen...it's...cute...lovely...smart...plus...amazing...you think so?...oh yes...it...stunning...kindly...love it! Hug it...when...sleeping...warm and cuddly...spectacular...ravishing... Oops, look at the time! I've kept you at this castle too long. Anyway, I got some opportunities for Talking. It looks like she at least expected you to be hurt. He doesn't need to. His sword hits automatically. Twice. WHO NEEDS SOLDIERS idgi Sigurd is just letting himself get insulted It's okay, they can't cross the bridge. They're stuck there. Oh. Man, what DOES Sigurd have to do to impress people? Everyone acts as if he's Low Tier. Azel sees Alvis and decides to run for his life. Fin decides to go and check out the local dealers... Score! Must...set...bandit...on...fire...so...close... It's okay, Sigurd's got this. DON'T BURN DOWN MY ARDAN Sigurd is going to show everyone how many soldiers he needs. By the way, every single damn convo starts with "what are you doing here?". Not everyone answers it, but Alvis's response is pretty satisfactory. "There's only two of those in the game!" He can hear you, you know. No no no it's okay you can send him back It won't be easy. Mission complete. Ardan is not slow, he just likes to take his time. "We're saved because there's still one house left. Because, you know, villages never need more than one house!" Emphasis on small. Everything else was taken. I'll send Ardan to them straight away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mekkah Posted August 17, 2011 Author Share Posted August 17, 2011 WATCH OUT WHERE YOU'RE THROWING THAT AZEL "No, I just like to watch villages burn. And kick ass." No, he thinks I went shopping. With Azel. My dad could beat up your dad. He can't bring her back if you shoot him. What? Sigurd suffers from Alzheimer's. No he isn't. He was right next to you. Look at what these bandits do to girls! Or people who look like girls. Like Midir. It's okay, this isn't FE5. Green units can't hurt you. Sigurd is pretty quick to change his mind. What? You can't rely on NPCs to defend Lenster. Trust me. DAMNIT! There was only one night where they talked late. No, he totally hadn't. And neither has Elthsan, since he's here as well. Right? But not in Ch4. He's talking about Gerrard. Hm... Alzheimers. INVADE THEIR COUNTRY! Damnit I want to be able to walk this far in one turn Finally someone recognizes Sigurd's badassness. He's not allowed to have the Silver Sword otherwise. These? He means Jungby and Chalphy? I only have one Alec, you know. Like from burning axes or people changing its color. How do they know there's about to be a battle? And why am I still going to be receiving his pay for castles like Madino? Or even Silesia and Zaxon, where he's only at because he's been branded a traitor? Future chapters may come up sometime. In multiple parts, of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 Hey this was actually kinda funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anouleth Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 Verdane has already planned out who gets what chick. Gandolf gets Aideen, Jamka gets Briggid, and so on: to cut a long list short, Gerrard gets Claude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zkirsche Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 Since this is a translation patch and since I'm not Paperblade it might not be as funny It's plenty funny, don't worry. Sigurd's stupidity is particularly hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.M. Gei Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 I'll be following this one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smiley Jim Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 You know, this is actually quite funny. Small question, Mekkah. Who are you gonna pair each woman with? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 This is great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCam Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Thou, sir, art hilarious. And yes, the translation is epic win. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Small question, Mekkah. Who are you gonna pair each woman with? noooo let's let him surprise us Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikethfc Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Pretty damn funny looking forward to the next update. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shin Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 noooo let's let him surprise us Long live Roddleban! Good stuff so far, some screenshots of major RNG unfairness would be a nice addition. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mekkah Posted August 18, 2011 Author Share Posted August 18, 2011 You know, this is actually quite funny. Small question, Mekkah. Who are you gonna pair each woman with? Oh yeah I was gonna mention that. I'll pick pairings (or lack of) from suggestions itt. I reserve the right to reject uninteresting, unfair or ungodly ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bottlegnomes Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Levin/Fury because who gives a shit how efficient a pairing is in an LP? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Psych Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Holyn x Briggid Dew x Ayra Tiltyu x Levn/Lex gogogo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Methan0n Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Dew x Lachesis because of convo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.M. Gei Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Levin/Tiltyu Lex/Ayra Holyn/Briggid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ansem Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Sigurd X Cuan Fuck it, you never said no Yaoi. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CT075 Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 FinTiltyu. Always. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor Odinson Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Sigurd/Ayra, hack the game 8D I want Lakche for lord dammit Alternatively, HolynAyra LexTiltyu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smiley Jim Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 (edited) Please do these pairings: Aideen/Midir Aira/Lex Lachesis/Beowulf Fury/Levin Sylvia/Claude Tiltyu/Azel Brigid/Jamka Go. Edited August 18, 2011 by James Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 (edited) Oh come now. At least let him do something interesting, people. How many Holyn(lex)/Ayras do we really need? Ardan/Ayra. Midir/Briggid for creepy convos. Seconding Dew/Lachesis. PLEASE GOD ANYBODY BUT NOISH OR LEVIN / Fury. Kill off Tiltyu, use Linda, use Buttface for swords only. Edited August 18, 2011 by Integrity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darros Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 (edited) You know you want Holsety Patty. Critical and Continue on Faval is fun. Jamka and Aideen. :D Edited August 18, 2011 by Spykitty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shin Posted August 19, 2011 Share Posted August 19, 2011 Arden's conversation is better than Holyn's! Although that's pretty much all he has going for him. DewxAyra: Awesome stats go! It also lets them borrow the Elite Ring between users. JamkaxEdain: Real men don't need pursuit! LexxLachesis: Mobile tank go! LevinxSylvia: Creates the most terrifying Corple known to man. AzelxFury: Sety can use... um... Volcannon? BeowulfxTiltyu: They can swap to swords, right? AlecxBriggid: I swear Briggid's incredibly paranoid. She suspects Midale and Jamka are still after Edain, and that Alec would cheat on her with all the women in Jungby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.