Guideline change...?

[Cynthia]

Not sure if this is in the guidelines already, but I think it should be added, as I see some topics that are made that report serious issues that really shouldn't be here, and instead taken to a professional.

I hate to pinpoint people out, but sadly it's fairly hard to do subtly without making it dead obvious, so nothing against these members, I'm just trying to make a point...

What I'm talking about is how some members make topics saying they are all "emo," and depressed and such. People could take that literally and think they are hurting themselves because of it, and if they are, that NEEDS to go to a professional.

As a second example, and I REALLY hate to pinpoint him out, but I sort of need an argument behind this for people to take it seriously, but Gatrie going around saying this site stopped him from committing suicide, is something he should keep to himself... As for two reasons.

1. That's a problem best addressed by a professional in the first place, not here.

2. It may encourage other members who have or obtain similar problems to post them here because they think because one member was helped, that the community will make it better for them as well, which really SHOULD be taken to a professional.

To pinpoint the exact kinds of issues I'm talking about, here is a simple list, but it is not limited to these, and I'm not saying anyone has ever posted these kinds of things, or will, but it doesn't hurt to point them out JUST IN CASE:

1. "I think I'm pregnant." Please see a doctor, and consult them or your parents on such an issue. A board mostly made up of teenagers to talk about a game isn't exactly the place to seek advice for that.

2. "I'm thinking about suicide, or have tried to commit suicide." If you tried to commit suicide and failed, I think that's best kept to yourself. If you are still having suicidal thoughts, then it's a good idea to talk to a professional, and NOT this board.

3. "I'm thinking about/have/currently still hurting myself." Professional help, I don't know how many times I can say it. There are other sites out there to address this kind of problem, but this one isn't one of them.

4. "I hate my life." I've seen more along the lines of this than anything. Just don't post them, it makes people feel sorry for you, and sometimes even cry over you, when you really are just soaking up attention. Sure your life MAY be bad, but this isn't the purpose of the forum, and it really isn't going to make your life better. If you want to post about a specific problem, then that is fine, but don't just post why your overall life sucks, or make excessive posts about problems, it brings everyone down.

5. "My family is in debt/trouble/etc.!" Yeah, this isn't the place to help you on that. We aren't a legal team.

6. "I hate *Insert name here*" Whether they are someone that's here, or someone who isn't, this is a surefire way to start and argument.

7. "I broke the law, and now..." Seriously, that's not a good example to set for the younger members. Just keep it to yourself, or take it off the site.

8. "I have thoughts of killing/hurting someone." NO, DON'T BRING THEM HERE.

Alternatively, don't use your personal problems to justify negative actions you do here. I don't see that TOO often, but I do see it.

Also on an unrelated note, I want to say that the "FESS," members who came here seem to be fitting in, but I would like to remind a few, (and no names are being given, and I won't say if I've spoken to them or not, but I have read their posts) that this ISN'T FESS, so please don't try and make things as if it were, because the forum isn't going to morph slowly into your old community. I'm not saying ALL of you, as 95% of you are fine, however some do need to realize this is a new place, and it's not going to change to be like the old one. Like I said, for the protection of those members, no names are being given.

[lolDeath]

You obviously do not know the ways of the attention whore. It's nice to see someone who cares this much though, for a change.

[Cynthia]

You obviously do not know the ways of the attention whore. It's nice to see someone who cares this much though, for a change.

Oh, I'm well aware people use this to attention whore, but I'm more concerned about the other members than stopping them from attention whoring.

[TheEnd]

I have bad news for you:

there are some parallels between SF and FESS1 (that is, Pre-Superbus FESS, ~4 years ago).

Although, to be honest, it was Superbus's intervention that created the FESS most people know, and that won't be happening here.

EDIT: More on topic... maybe it's just me, but I was under the impression that the staff has been making an effort, as of late, to tell the community that they aren't making things stricter because of the swarm of "FESSugees" coming in or whatever. Your suggestion of content censorship goes against that effort, so it may be a bad time for suggesting such a thing.

Just a worthless opinion.

Edited November 26, 2008 by TheEnd

[lolDeath]

I am just concerned with the annoyance it causes, so yeah, I agree with you either way. Attention whores should learn to use Myspace. But what exactly are you suggesting? I'm in favor of it just being deleted when made with a warning to the topic creator.

[Cynthia]

I am just concerned with the annoyance it causes, so yeah, I agree with you either way. Attention whores should learn to use Myspace. But what exactly are you suggesting? I'm in favor of it just being deleted when made with a warning to the topic creator.

I was hoping to leave that up to the staff, as it's not my place to decide punishments.

[lolDeath]

Suggestions to get the ball rolling never hurt. The guidelines here need some all around work anyways, in my ever so humble opinion.

[Crystal Shards]

Also on an unrelated note, I want to say that the "FESS," members who came here seem to be fitting in, but I would like to remind a few, (and no names are being given, and I won't say if I've spoken to them or not, but I have read their posts) that this ISN'T FESS, so please don't try and make things as if it were, because the forum isn't going to morph slowly into your old community. I'm not saying ALL of you, as 95% of you are fine, however some do need to realize this is a new place, and it's not going to change to be like the old one. Like I said, for the protection of those members, no names are being given.

Was this even necessary to add? I just want to ask, considering you said it's not really a problem. If it's not a problem then don't bring it up, or instead of making a vague statement in public and making it seem like a bigger problem than it is, tell them yourself via PM or something.

Anyway, I haven't seen it, but that's probably because if anything it's in FFtF which I don't really visit that often. If it's a problem then sure, I agree.

[Cynthia]

Was this even necessary to add? I just want to ask, considering you said it's not really a problem. If it's not a problem then don't bring it up, or instead of making a vague statement in public and making it seem like a bigger problem than it is, tell them yourself via PM or something.

Anyway, I haven't seen it, but that's probably because if anything it's in FFtF which I don't really visit that often. If it's a problem then sure, I agree.

Just something to add while I was making a statement to make less topics, it's not really something that needs to be changed, just how I personally feel about it. I'd rather not persecute any one specific person on the matter however. I don't see it as big enough of an issue to personally address each individual.

Really though, I want to focus on the other issue I stated, as the bottom statement really doesn't have much discussion value, as I don't plan on pointing out any 1 specific person. More of a "while I'm pitching an idea," statement.

Also I said it's not REALLY a problem, meaning it isn't a huge issue, but it does bother me a tad. I mean I for one am not Xenophobic, but I do understand when people leave one area due to some kind of accident, or something they tend to want to make their new area more like the old one. Subconsciously sometimes though.

What I REALLY want to focus on is these guidelines, as they should be considered.

I don't know about you, but I for one don't want to have people coming here like it's some teenage problem site...

Plus even people praising us for helping them on such issues is bad, because then others will want the same kind of help, which none of us are certified to provide.

Edited November 26, 2008 by Cynthia

[Jyosua]

If members want to talk about this type of thing, they need to use a blog or something, not this forum. Those type of topics really do not fit well here. I told TLS the same thing. We probably should consider making it a guideline though, to try not to post those things.

As for the comment for the FESSers, that was unnecessary. As TheEnd said, this place has quite a number of parallels between it and FESS1 (Hell, we even have the immature members to go with it 8D). As such, they treat this place the same way they would've treated FESS1. For some, such as TheEnd, that's not much of a change, because they were around back then, and haven't changed their attitudes all that much since those times. In any case, they do realize this isn't FESS, and if anything, it's going to go in a different direction entirely as it changes.

[Cynthia]

If members want to talk about this type of thing, they need to use a blog or something, not this forum. Those type of topics really do not fit well here. I told TLS the same thing. We probably should consider making it a guideline though, to try not to post those things.

As for the comment for the FESSers, that was unnecessary. As TheEnd said, this place has quite a number of parallels between it and FESS1 (Hell, we even have the immature members to go with it 8D). As such, they treat this place the same way they would've treated FESS1. For some, such as TheEnd, that's not much of a change, because they were around back then, and haven't changed their attitudes all that much since those times. In any case, they do realize this isn't FESS, and if anything, it's going to go in a different direction entirely as it changes.

Understood. Just ignore that part then, although I still stand by the idea of people liking to have that, "at home feeling."

Related to the first part: I was thinking you'd notice that kind of talk getting more and more common.

Edited November 26, 2008 by Cynthia

[Florete]

I agree 100%. It's topics like that that have been repelling me from FFtF. I used to try and be a helper but they appear so much these days it's just plain annoying.

[YokaiKnight]

I am really, really wary about content censorship in the rules/guidelines. I don't think a rule is necessary. If these kinds of topics are common (I visit FftF on occasion, but I haven't been in there most of the last week), something like an administrative announcement might be a better idea.

I will say that I agree that people should know the difference between a video game forum and a counselor. Also, don't be pathetic/a freaking attention whore and make topics that serve no purpose but to have people pat you on the back, e.g. "i'm leaving for good...unless i get 3 pages of 'don't go!!!1!'"

[Knife]

I agree. The forums are not a good place to solve personal problems. If you absolutely must share your problems with someone, do it with a close friend IRL. If you got no friends, talk to someone here that is close to you via PM.

[Gatrie: Guns Blazing]

hey i already told everyone i would be MUCH less open about that crap.

[Jyosua]

It's not censorship, it's just that a forum based around a video game series is not a good place to go seeking serious help.

[Gatrie: Guns Blazing]

It's not censorship, it's just that a forum based around a video game series is not a good place to go seeking serious help.

to be honost its my only place to go besides school, starbucks, and the gym.

but i thought i made it clear to everyone that I was sorry and I would try to stop. geez at least give me credit for not doing it recently.

[TLSothe]

As an attention whore, I agree. Yeah, I may be an attention whore, but still, it goes to major extremes here.

[Gatrie: Guns Blazing]

Ok just so EVERYONE knows.

I WILL NOT ask for personall advice here ever again, seeing that IM SUCH A BAD EXAMPLE. Not to mention the fact that I do get professional help, which helps none at all.

I do appreciate you putting me on blast like that. yeah, really nice of you. Im sure you could not of gotten your point across without screaming my name.

[TLSothe]

Ok just so EVERYONE knows.

I WILL NOT ask for personall advice here ever again, seeing that IM SUCH A BAD EXAMPLE. Not to mention the fact that I do get professional help, which helps none at all.

I do appreciate you putting me on blast like that. yeah, really nice of you. Im sure you could not of gotten your point across without screaming my name.

...

I..

*Sigh*

Well, I don't think you're as bad as Doom is/was, and Suzaku was...

[Gatrie: Guns Blazing]

...

I..

*Sigh*

Well, I don't think you're as bad as Doom is/was, and Suzaku was...

i was talking to cynthia, bro

[Tino]

I fully support this proposal, and I think that rule should be enforced on the double, if it's not being enforced already.

[Cynthia]

I don't recall anywhere saying you were a bad example and should never seek advice here Gatrie. If it came off to you that way, then I'm sorry.

Plus, no one is pointing the finger at you. I used you as an example ONCE, no one else said your name or pinpointed you.

If I had not used your name people were going to guess who I was referring to anyways, so it would have served the same point.

I do give you credit for not doing it recently, but I wasn't implying that you do it every day, and all the time. You're taking it WAY too seriously. No one is "screaming," your name. Your name was mentioned once here, and no one else pointed the finger at you after.

Also, I don't think the persecution of Doom or Suzaku was needed Blue Fox...

Edited November 26, 2008 by Cynthia

[TLSothe]

I don't recall anywhere saying you were a bad example and should never seek advice here Gatrie. If it came off to you that way, then I'm sorry.

Plus, no one is pointing the finger at you. I used you as an example ONCE, no one else said your name or pinpointed you.

If I had not used your name people were going to guess who I was referring to anyways, so it would have served the same point.

I do give you credit for not doing it recently, but I wasn't implying that you do it every day, and all the time. You're taking it WAY too seriously. No one is "screaming," your name. Your name was mentioned once here, and no one else pointed the finger at you after.

Also, I don't think the persecution of Doom or Suzaku was needed Blue Fox...

I didn't persecute them. I said they were bigger attention whores than I am. I can't/won't lie about it.

[Crystal Shards]

I love how the self-proclaimed attention whores are drawing attention to themselves in a topic about not being one.