Makaze

I really hope my message gets through. To Esau, at least. And now to stop being invested...

I'm not suggesting apologizing. I am suggesting that you can worry about healing your pain when it becomes harder to heal than the other side's. Imagine being likened to a rapist and murderer and being treated as if you could be one your whole life and you might gain a little perspective. They have been dealing with these things their entire life. You had to deal with a few comments on the internet. When you equate your pain to theirs, it is... Highly insensitive and self-absorbed. Your pain matters, but you are in less pain. In my opinion, that means you can be held to a higher standard than those you are hurting. As much as I hate the phrase, what you are experiencing here is privilege. You think you are not obligated to consider their pain because you 'couldn't know'. Earlier, you said that you were fine with healing people and that understanding doesn't excuse bad behavior. Now you are saying that you shouldn't be expected to understand. You 'have no way of knowing that' because you assumed they had not been through it from the start! Let me break this down in case you don't think you assumed that: You could either assume that they have been through pain or assume they have not. Not assuming anything is the same as assuming they have not. You clearly have not assumed that they went through the pain, so it must be the latter. That means that you have been disregarding their pain by assuming it doesn't exist until proven otherwise. You meant the response to Esau by itself? I see. You misunderstood something vital. I was not critiquing his post. I was critiquing the attitude behind the phrase 'not all men'. --- I think I do need to apologize for something. Especially now. dondon was wrong about the particular thing I was being hypocritical on, but I have been hypocritical because I have been pointing out the flaws in your behavior without trying to heal you. I suppose what you can take from this is how it feels to have your emotional reactions criticized without empathy from the other side.

My patience with dondon is high. This is a good thing. Totally not trying to convince myself or anything.

Is he petitioning to delete serious discussion?

If you do not have anything of value to add to any specific points, please do not post. Edit: Actually... Not going to let that slide. You just attempted to shame me without countering my argument. You clearly ignored any valid points I might have had. Your only thought was that it had pop psychology (whatever that is) in it, therefore it is invalid. This is exactly the kind of thing I meant. Exactly what piece of advice am I supposed to be taking?

Is it working?

Right back at you.

Since we can't expect that to happen any time soon we need to think about things we can actually do to make the world a better place on the day to day.

Is easy going.

Also: Call people out for perpetuating the harmful ideas. If you have been convinced that sexism exists and will be less exist in the future, that's one for the team. It will help if you convince others as you have been convinced.

Realizing that looking down on them for reacting badly perpetuates their perceptions is very important. When you correct their bad arguments without making them feel that you understand, you come off as if all you care about is correcting them. You came to tell them they were wrong and then you're done. That is disregarding their pain. Timing and approach are paramount. They are wrong. Their views are harmful. Even so, your correction only adds more pain. It helps no one. It comes from your own need to correct and pride. In many cases it does even more work to convince them of their position than if you did nothing at all.

Did I do you proud, Loki?

Brilliant. I love it.

This thread is going all over the place. Why is it going all over the place? Disclaimer: I know little about this subject, but it should be closer to base anyway. In order to understand why somebody might get upset over a phrase like "not all men", think about the context for the person who demonized all men. Women are less privileged than men. Women face a lot of social stereotyping by men and other women alike as irrational and irresponsible. They are infantilized constantly. They are manipulated and looked down on by businessmen who see them as easy targets for their sales pitches. They get told not to go out at night alone. They get told not to wear attractive clothing. They get blamed very often for things done to them. There are large groups of people who shame them for exploring their sexualities, men and women alike. There is a hell of a lot of resentment towards men in this because they happen to be the primary perpetrators in cases where women are hurt and taken advantage of. Women were killed. They were singled out for being women, by a man. A man who kills women for not having sex with him. Many women, hurt as they are by their experiences, see this as an extreme example of the same thing that has been happening to them their whole lives. They know that sexist things are prevalent. They act out in anger due to their pain both at the past and at the tragedy that has just happened. They see as men as capable of the actions of this one. They are afraid. They have been made afraid by men their whole lives, and now one has gone and killed women because they were women. It is perfectly natural to generalize when your worst fears are realized. You come into this situation and your first thought is, "I'm not like that! How dare they compare me to that psycho." Seriously? You are disregarding their entire experience and their pain because your pride was hurt for a couple of seconds. The insensitivity of these statements is astounding. When people overreact to pain, defending yourself is not the proper reaction. Trying to understand their pain and heal them, is.

Resolving conflicts easily. Wouldn't get rid of any skills. In your opinion, what is least attractive personality trait a person can have?

Pride. Pride that makes me defend myself when I don't need to. Skill you most want to have?

Insecure.

Desire for improvement. It makes all of my flaws temporary. Personality trait you would get rid of if you could?

Precision + nice texture >>> whatever crayons have? Yes I do think so.

What is your least favourite thing about Awakening? The Sacred Stones The Blazing Sword Awakening Path of Radiance The Sealed Sword

Don't need 'em.

What game was this? It sounds interesting.

Why the name Knight? Anything added in Awakening.

I hope dondon gets it this time, but not getting my hopes up.

Years and years of living.