FE8 Permadeath PMU

[Blasied]

Let's get started.

Renais is attacked. Seth rescues her from danger, by her father's orders. When Valter appears and Seth attacks him, Eirika facepalms at his decision to use the steel sword instead of the silver lance. This to her was proof that early game prepromotes were irredeemably bad. They can't do anything right.

After another rescue dash and drop off, Eirika demanded Seth's vulnerary and sent him off to the corner while she gets the EXP that is her birthright and only hers. She dodges axes like she's had lots of practice, not getting hit once. She is not only a master axe avoider but a disciple in the Way of the Superflous Critical TM. Her fancy dispatchment of the second soldier earns her a level up. She gains +SKL only. Seth heard a faint Sigh from under the bridge. The owner of The Sigh jotted some notes about "unsatisfactory development". The last enemy charged forth to add injury to insult with his axe. He failed. Miserably. Eirika's axe dodging training was really paying off.

Feeling fully adrenaline pumped, Eirika wasted no time in crossing the bridge and to the next map. What she saw horrified her.

"NOOOOO! NOT LANCES! ANYTHING BUT LANCES!" She shrieked.

In response to her cry for help an armour knight appeared out of nowhere. Eirika decided that he was cool and that he would be permitted to assist her. The kid that followed him, however, would not as he was not cool. The knight clanked his way over to the closest and most threatening soldier and let his protective fury fly. Into the soldier's shield.

Eirika poked an axe fighter's eye out and calculated the odds of her saviour failing at hitting the enemy at the same time because she's a woman and therefore can multitask. She estimated around a 7% chance of failure. Her dissatisfaction with her knight's competence and desire to prove her superiority brought forth a +HP, SKL, SPD, LUK, DEF level.

After the knight had finally dispatched of all the immediate lancers the two groups met up. Eirika immediately took control of the situation.

"Kid, give me your sword and the rest of your stuff to Armour then go back to where you came from. Prepromote, you follow Kid. Armour, you keep the people following me away from me while I attack the castle." Seth and Franz accepted their fate and did as they were told.

"My name's Gilliam," the armour knight muttered before heading to the fort to the south. Enemies hated people on forts. He sat there, being tickled occasionally by people with axes before eating them in two bites (three for one of them, because Gilliam missed the first bite). After a sufficient of enemies had been devoured, he powered up. His level was +HP.

The Sigh came from the northern fort and more notes were scribbled. The way The Sigh followed him around made Seth nervous.

While Gilliam fed, Eirika ran to the castle. A lance fighter ambushed her and knocked half her health off. He went down with a few angry glares backed up by stabbings. She drank one of her vulneraries (today's flavour was cherry, yuck) and stood in front of the castle gate, waiting for the occupant to attack her. He did and died a quick death to her rapier.

The castle had a princess in it. Eirika decided that this princess was not very cool and that she wished for the princess to leave her presence. The princess, feeling insulted, chased Eirika to her bigger castle where her father could hopefully give her a lesson in manners.

More coming sometime.

Stats!

NAME     LVL  CLASS   HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   5    Lord    18  5   11  11  7   4   2   D Swd
Gilliam  5    Knight  26  9   6   3   3   9   3   C Lnc
Moulder                     BASE                       

So, given that this is my first time doing anything like this, any feedback? Am I trying too hard to be funny here?

[Hash Jar]

I like the imagery :D It makes the lack of screens not so bad and you know it's cool.

Yikes on some of those level ups.

Edited August 25, 2012 by Hash Jar

[Shin]

But people here get off on being cruel to others.

Let him have his fun. I can deal with it.

I apologize for nothing! Good stuff, your text makes up for the lack of screenies! I can't wait to see what you have to say about some of your choices.

[NTNP]

The narrative flair is rather nice. I hope that you take on some additional narrative stuff like you did with Erika, Seth, Franz and Gilliam interacting. Perhaps even lampshading the audacity of some of the situations that you are placing your party in along with the ever present stalker... all in all very good and I'm looking forward to the next installment.

[Refa]

I don't like your text. Why, I don't like it very much at all. It makes me feel all self-concious, and dissapointed in my own text based efforts at humour concerning FE8.

But seriously, keep up the good work, looking forwards to more!

[Blasied]

The uncool princess chased Eirika off to the bigger castle, where her father was waiting and ready to chastise his daughter's bully.

"Now Eirika, what is this I hear about you telling my girl to "sit on my sword and swivel"?" Hayden inquired. "Surely you must be aware of the ramifications of such... insolence."

"Actually, I'm not. Why don't you fill me in?" asked Eirika.

"You're banished," Hayden said. "Leave this country and do not return until you are ready to apologise. Gilliam, Vanessa, Moulder, escort her out of my borders and ensure that she does not return until she sees the error of her ways." The armour knight picked up the insolent princess and dragged her out of the castle. The priest and the pegasus knight followed, occasionally carrying the flailing princess instead when Gilliam's shins acquired too many bruises.

Seth and Franz followed the struggling Frelians, mostly just playing knife paper rock against each other. Seth won most of the time.

After a day of painfully slow travel (everyone blamed Gilliam for that) the princess escort group reached the town of Ide. Eirika, back on her home turf, had a sudden rush of motivation.

"Villages! That means tributes!" Eirika declared. "Let's go!" Gilliam, feeling that she wouldn't try to run back to Frelia, unceremoniously dropped her on the ground. Eirika charged into the closest village. She saw an elegant looking woman near the gate. "I'm armed! Give me something shiny!" She demanded. Elegant woman raised an eyebrow.

"I could vapourise you if I wanted to," she said, "but I'll play along. Catch!" The elegant woman threw a shiny red object out of the village gates. Eirika chased it like a puppy.

Vanessa heard a crash from beyond the rocks by the villages that Eirika was harassing. She flew over to see what was happening, motioning for Moulder and Gilliam to follow as best they could. She flew back to them, carrying a boy with a small axe. Gilliam helped the boy off Vanessa's pegasus. The boy showed his thanks by coughing some blood into Gilliam's face. Moulder hit him with his staff and all his injuries disappeared.

Eirika, having found the red shiny, saw that her entourage had a new person. He had black hair and an axe. This was a good combination. "You! Boy! I want you to follow me around and do as I say!" She commanded. The boy (Ross) burst into tears.

"My daddy's in danger! He needs help!" he wailed.

"Does he have black hair and an axe?"

"Yes."

"Then Pegasus here will rescue him. You, on the other hand, will go into that village and retrieve a tribute." Eirika pushed him towards the unvisited village. "Also, Armour," she turned to Gilliam, "there are some ugly people looking at me funny. Punish them." Gilliam headed south to face almost certain doom. Ross headed north and after two minutes of crying and begging was given a magic potion and thrown out. "Good job, slave boy." Eirika gave him a condescending pat on the head.

Vanessa returned with a large man, fuming with anger about how hand axes couldn't hit the broad side of a barn. Ross tackled him with a hug when he got off the pegasus. "YOU'RE ALIVE!" He squealed. Large man, however, could smell blood and pushed Ross off himself to partake in glorious violence. Eirika only smelled failure when Ross's dad missed one of the uglies. "19% chance of failure," she thought to herself. Some more uglies had dug themselves out from some rocks to the south-west. She poked them a few times, gaining a +SKL, SPD, LUK level for her troubles.

Gilliam and Ross's dad were not doing very well. Ross's dad charged down to the fort and to an archer who was posing a threat to his son and the staff guy. He missed a 78. Gilliam, thinking that the best course of action would be to keep Moulder out of the way, as there were a lot of uglies nearby, drank one of his vulneraries (orange flavour). Ross threw his axe at one of the uglies attempting to hit Eirika. For his efforts, he was given a +HP, STR, SKL level.

After those uqlies were dispatched, Eirika chased Vanessa off to the path where Franz and Seth were playing I Spy. Eirika then grabbed her slave boy and went to the armoury, just in time to see Gilliam get a +HP, STR, SKL level and for Garcia to die to two 42's.

Someone in the first village started crying. Seth and Franz thought it sounded suspiciously like The Sigh that had been following them.

"That wasn't supposed to happen," Eirika said. Ross's eyes turned completely blue and started showing an error message. The leader of the uglies swiped at Eirika. He missed and she poked him a few times. "Slave boy," she called, "this guy killed your dad."

Ross's eyes turned solid red and he decapitated the leader. He gained a +HP, STR, SKL, RES level from his rage. His eyes then reverted to the error screen.

Eirika took the coinpurses of all the uglies (at least, the ones she could bring herself to touch). One of the coinpurses had directions to the uglies' base. She walked decided to follow said directions because there would probably bee loot involved. She gathered the cool people (ordering Gilliam to carry Ross) and set off.

Franz, Seth and Vanessa were ignored.

"I spy with my little eye," said Vanessa "Something beginning with C."

"Carrot?" asked Franz. No.

"Carriage?" asked Seth. No.

"Cucumber?" No. Stop thinking with your stomach.

"Coil?" No.

"We give up," Franz and Seth said.

"Corpse," said Vanessa, "I see a corpse." She was referring to Garcia.

Franz fainted.

Stats!

NAME     LVL  CLASS   HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   6    Lord    18  5   12  12  8   4   2   C Swd
Gilliam  6    Knight  27  10  7   3   3   9   3   C Lnc
Moulder  3    Priest              BASE                       
Ross     3    Trainee 17  7   4   3   8   3   1   E Axe
Garcia   4    Corpse              DEAD            

And so we have our first death. I was not expecting it to be that quick. I seem to suck at this.

That write up is a bit longer than intended. I just couldn't stop.

The substitutes are:

Seth

Franz

Vanessa

Neimi

Colm

Artur

Natasha

Kyle

Tana

Innes

Gerik

Tethys

Marisa

Dozla

Saleh

Cormag

Rennac

Duessel

Myrrh

EDIT: Whoops, forgot to update Eirika and Gilliam's stats.

Edited August 26, 2012 by Blasied

[Kon]

Well, the first death happened a lot sooner than what I expected. Let's hope that Sniper!Neimi won't let you down. ;P

The narrative is great, by the way. I'm looking forward to the next update. :D

[Blasied]

Well, the first death happened a lot sooner than what I expected. Let's hope that Sniper!Neimi won't let you down. ;P

The narrative is great, by the way. I'm looking forward to the next update. :D

Yeah, I am really rusty. Failing so early at FE8 is shameful.

Thanks.

[CT075]

oh god i'm dying

why are you so good at this

[Blasied]

Looting time!

After a considerable amount of time searching high and low for the bandit hold (no one Eirika cared about could read the map) it was found. Eirika's first order was to break the weak walls and slaughter any uglies found on the other side. While the walls were desperately being flailed at, no one noticed the small archer sneak her way into the group. The archer was looking for a thief boy who she had a huge crush on. When the thief boy (Colm) appeared, Eirika instantly conscripted him and gave him the orders to nab everything he could see. Colm, quite captivated by Eirika, immediately obeyed and ran off to work, stepping on Neimi's foot without even noticing she existed. This triggered unspeakable rage in the archer. A rage that could only be sated by shooting everything that moved.

Once the wall to the bottom room was torn down, Eirika pushed all the "unwanteds" into it (Seth, Franz and Vanessa). This was fine by them, they just sat around the chest in the middle of the room and played Go Fish.

Eirika's group (and Neimi) pushed into the main room. Eirika did most of the fighting as Gilliam was useless against axes, Ross was useless in general, Moulder couldn't fight and the archer was an archer. Moulder jumped with joy when Eirika got hit by a 20, he finally got to do something. The Sigh, currently hiding in the chest being used as a card table, just did what it did best when presented with failure. Franz leaped to the corner of the room with a yelp. No more card games.

Eirika's force, feeling quite pleased with the progress they were making (a level up or two for everyone except Gilliam) headed up to the command room of the fort. There was an ugly standing on a bench. Eirika poked him for a dismal 3 x 2, Then got hit in the face by a 23.

Colm burst into the bottom room, searching desperately for treasure worth picking up. The other three chests had been thoroughly disappointing and he desperately wanted this commander girl's favour. He saw a chest with some cards on it. Before he could open it, Vanessa tackled him shouting "NONONONONONONO!" The Sigh, sensing Eirika's failure, sighed again. Colm didn't need any more convincing.

Back to the fight, Eirika was being the only effective source of damage while Moulder occasionally hit people with his staff to fix them up. Eventually the big ugly went down. Eirika looked at the bench he was standing on. These seemed to be handy, she needed one. She made Gilliam pick it up and carry it out of the fort. She then met up with the unwanted people, needing to have some words with them.

"The supply wagon has got something in it for all of you," she said while parading in front of them. "Go inside and have a look." The three unpopular people got into the wagon and took a look. There was a newly installed bench.

"And you will all sit on it until you decide to leave me alone!" Eirika declared before turning around to discuss treasure with Colm. Colm had only found an iron sword, and iron lance and a hand axe. 20 seconds later, Colm was also sitting on the bench.

Neimi fired another arrow at Eirika. She had shot Eirika 10 times and yet the princess hadn't noticed. "You win this time..." Neimi hissed before turning her interest towards the local wildlife, who at least had the decency to bleed when shot.

Continuing later, but for now...

Stats!

NAME     LVL  CLASS   HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   9    Lord    20  6   14  14  10  6   3   C Swd
Gilliam  6    Knight  27  10  7   3   3   9   3   C Lnc
Moulder  5    Priest  22  4   6   11  1   3   6   C Sta
Ross     6    Trainee 20  7   5   4   9   4   2   E Axe
Neimi    2    Archer  18  5   5   7   4   3   2   D Bow
Garcia   4    Corpse              DEAD            

@Cam: It's a mystery to us all...

Edited August 31, 2012 by Blasied

[Fanfaire]

So... Neimi is a Yandere?

[Blasied]

Eirika was desperate for something interesting to happen. 15 seconds had passed without anything to do, or even work towards. Fortune smiled upon her and she heard a small squeak. Upon investigating the location of said noise, she found a line of dead animals. Seeing this as interesting, she dragged everyone along her investigation to where this line went. 7 minutes later she found zombies. A grin found its way to her face.

"EASY EXP! YAY!" Eirika did a little hop as she announced her discovery. Before she could arrange her troops, an orange haired nancy-boy ran up to her.

"Please take me with you! I want to kill zombies too! Killing zombies is what I live for!" He threw himself onto Eirika's left leg during his plea.

"Get up," Eirika barked, "if you want to do it so badly, show me what you've got." Nancy-boy complied and attacked a nearby floating eye. Eirika was unimpressed.

"That's it? You throw sparkles around and actually NEEDED a critical hit? Gilliam, remove him from my sight." Gilliam hit him over the head and proceeded to carry the nancy-boy for the rest of the map.

Gilliam, Moulder and Ross went east, while Eirika went south. Neimi followed Eirika and stole almost all of her kills. Neimi found this to be incredibly satisfying and got a +STR, SPD level. Even Ross could kill things (after Gilliam hit them anyway) and leveled up a lot, his first being +HP, STR.

Before any more levels were gained though, a future recruitable appeared. Everyone could tell because she was green and not ugly. As much as she would have loved to charge down the cliff and be recruited at a sensible time, her horse didn't like the idea of committing suicide and insisted on taking the long way around. The horse won the ensuing argument.

Everyone was finding zombie slaying to be really enjoyable. Zombies bleed delicious, delicious EXP. Go for the head to get the most satisfying EXP. Gilliam even gained SPD on his first level. The EXP tasted THAT good!

While Eirika was having her kills stolen by an unknown force (Neimi was not gaining EXP fast enough because she's an archer) she decided to visit a village, kick her feet up, maybe grab a beer. Instead, a little girl ambushed her.

"Is Artur killing zombies with you! Please take me as well! I'm much better than him at it anyway!" The girl pleaded in the same way the nancy-boy did, except she attached herself to Eirika's right leg instead.

"If you are anything like that other guy, I will stab you right now and-"

"I can set things on fire."

"You're in!"

And thus, Lute the mage was recruited.

Over in the eastern area, none of the three people had actually moved very much. You didn't need to when every zombie was polite enough to charge towards you if you so much as blinked. Nothing of interest really happened until Gilliam leveled up again and only gained +HP. The sigh was hiding under the bridge by the village with the mage girl in it, but everyone was too drunk with murderous joy to hear it. After Gilliam's disappointing level, Ross gained a +SKL, DEF level and immediately fainted.

"Too much EXP in one sitting," Moulder deduced. "He'll have to sleep it off. I'll carry him"

The map was almost over. The boss zombie got fed to Lute for a +HP, MAG, SPD, RES level. After all the zombies had been cleared out, the recruitable girl from before returned.

"I doth be here to aid thee in thy struggles and-" she began, but here rehearsed speech was interrupted by Eirika.

"No! You had your chance but you are too late. Try again later." And thus, the level 3 troubadour was pushed into a mid-game recruitment.

"Well fuck you too," the troubadour said, displaying a middle finger and riding away.

After the fight, Ross awoke on the bench. He'd had a dream while he was unconscious and it gave him an idea. He picked up a second axe and put on his head what he thought was a bandanna (but was actually a pair of underpants). "I am gonna be SO COOL."

Continuing later, but for now...

Stats!

NAME     LVL   CLASS   HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   9     Lord    20  6   14  14  10  6   3   C Swd
Gilliam  8     Knight  29  11  7   4   3   9   3   B Lnc
Moulder  5     Priest  22  4   6   11  1   3   6   C Sta
Ross     1     Pirate  24  12  6   6   9   6   3   C Axe
Neimi    4     Archer  18  6   6   9   5   3   3   D Bow
Lute     2     Mage    18  7   6   8   8   3   6   C Anm
Garcia   4     Corpse              DEAD            

@Fanfaire: Uh, due to my very small activity list, I don't speak anime. So, what is a yandere?

[MacLovin]

Replace Garcia with Assassin Joshua!

[Fanfaire]

Yay, the genius has arrived!

[Blasied]

Replace Garcia with Assassin Joshua!

Garcia has already been replaced with Sniper!Neimi and I already have Assassin!Joshua anyway.

[Blasied]

With the EXP fest over, Eirika decided to return to return to civilisation. In said civilised area, a cleric was running around. She had sensed that a bench had arrived in town and knew that she must sit on it. Behind her a hat said "I'd sit on your bench anytime."

Eirika's group met the cleric. "Are you in possession of the bench?" she asked. "I need to sit on the bench!" Eirika, being the nasty sort of person wanted to taunt her a bit.

"Why yes, we do have the bench," she said, "but for you to earn permission to sit on it, you must first give Mouldy your staff and..." Eirika was struggling to think of a second thing for the cleric to do. Upon seeing Joshua staring at Natasha's arse she got an idea, "and pick up that hat over there for me."

"Which hat?"

"The one with the sword coming out of it."

"But I'll die if I try that."

"Okay, we'll keep you alive while you do your job." Before Natasha could protest, the map had started.

Everyone deployed moved north, except for Neimi who decided to head over to Tethys's house and steal a dragonshield. The initial plan was for Eirika to head through the left path, Gilliam and Moulder through the middle and Ross and Lute to the right. After two enemy phases, this plan was declared bonkers and everyone formed up into one huge ball of playable units. Gilliam even had to use his orange flavoured vulnerary again because Moulder was busy healing everyone else. So busy that his heal staff broke.

"Oh goody," Moulder said deadpan, as he equipped Natasha's mend staff, "now I can get 12 exp instead of 11."

While baiting the fighters near the hat and trying to keep bandits out of the loot points, Ross faced a dilemma. "All you have to do is hit this 76," he thought to himself, "and you won't die to this guy when he hits his 64 twice." Ross swung his axe and missed. Thankfully, Ross was saved when the bandit missed the 64 on his counter attack.

Gilliam, who had stuck to the middle area, had reached level 10. His level up was +HP, STR, SPD, DEF. "About time I got DEF. It's a 55% growth and nothing until now?" he mused. "Fuck you RNG."

The fighters surrounding the hat had been cleared and Natasha was now ready to pick it up. First, to move the sword away and-

"That's right," the hat said "grab my sword." The unseen person under the hat then did a wink wink, nudge nudge motion.

"HOLY BOLLOCKS!" Natasha shouted before diving straight into the supply caravan and onto the bench. When Joshua tried to follow her, Eirika threw a sword at him.

"You will stay out here and be amazing you improbably sexy man!" she bellowed at him. This was a good enough replacement for the cleric, he figured. Aggressive was more his type anyway.

The Sigh was heard from the arena. Nobody knew why it popped up again. That's because nobody could see who failed.

Neimi had failed to hit a mercenary. With a 75. Twice. In a row. Fucking archers.

The brief confusion did not stop the boss from being killed. A guiding ring was awarded to Eirika for not letting bandits reach the loot points. Dialogue was ignored ans the game turned off before the sidequest chapter could start itself.

Continuing later, but for now...

Stats!

NAME     LVL   CLASS    HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   11    Lord     21  7   16  16  10  6   5   B Swd
Gilliam  10    Knight   31  13  8   5   4   10  3   B Lnc
Moulder  6     Priest   23  4   7   11  1   3   6   B Sta
Ross     3     Pirate   25  12  6   7   10  7   3   C Axe
Neimi    4     Archer   18  6   6   9   5   3   3   D Bow
Lute     4     Mage     20  8   9   9   8   4   7   C Anm
Joshua   6     Myrmidon 25  8   13  15  7   6   2   C Swd
Garcia   4     Corpse              DEAD            

Exams are currently happening to me, so progress will be even slower than usual. I've got too much procrastinating to do to find much time for this.

[Blasied]

Holy shit, this thing's flatlining. CPR! CPR!

*Ahem* Chapter 5x.

Ephraim knows that he is amazing. He does not tolerate people who dispute this fact (NOT opinion). For this reason, he'd had to bind and gag Kyle and Orson. He liked Forde though. Being around Forde made him look even better than he was.

In a moment of BRILLIANCE he had decided to attack a major fort. With two people. And weapons that were far too heavy for them. Nothing could go wrong.

One game over later, Ephraim tried the exact same opening strategy of sweeping down two soldiers in a blaze of glory while having Forde throw his javelin at the knight for barely any damage. He would then rush over and slay the knight in one hit with his cheat spear. Exactly the same moves, exactly the same results. Ephraim's first level was +SKL. A Sigh bubbled out of the water feature behind him. Forde's first level, after clearing out some enemies further up was +HP, STR, SKL, LUK, RES.

Ephraim didn't like Forde any more.

Upon entering the treasure room without dying to the mage, Ephraim received a killer lance. Forde swapped said lance with his javelin and ran off before Ephraim could stab him with his cheat spear. Ephraim vented his rage by throwing said javelin through a wall to kill something.

When Ephraim had emptied the treasure room, he tried to rejoin the fight. He tried but failed, since Forde had a horse and had taken the fight miles away and was stealing Ephraim's EXP.

Forde was having problems though. His new toy seemed to be malfunctioning. The lance just wouldn't spin when it was useful. After 14 uses only three spins happened, two of them on attacks that would have killed the enemy anyway. Eirika would be proud.

Ephraim and Forde reunited outside the throne area. Some luck saved Ephraim from a 59 that would have killed him. After cleaning house, their attention was turned to the boss. He had 5 attack speed. The steel blade turned out to be a bad idea. Forde double attacked but whiffed the crit both times. Ephraim waltzed over and popped a superfluous crit with 1/3 the chance of each of Forde's attacks. Feeling superior again, Ephraim decided to let Forde live.

Heading back to the entrance, where Ephraim had left the bound and gagged Kyle and Orson, Ephraim only found Kyle with a silver sword in his stomach and a steel lance in his head peacefully bleeding to death.

"ORSON ESCAPED!?!" Ephraim shouted directly into Kyle's ear, causing permanent hearing loss, "WHERE DID HE GO!?!"

Kyle, feeling the Ephraim had forgotten about the difficulties of trying to get answers from someone who was completely tied up, nudged his head towards the doorway leading out of the Fort. Ephraim charged off in that direction. Forde tied a rope to Kyle and dragged him while following Ephraim.

None of them even noticed the legion of wyvern knights following them and trying to kill them.

MEANWHILE - ON THE BENCH

Colm was taking bets as to who would be the next of Eirika's favourites to die.

Seth and Franz wanted it to be Gilliam.

Vanessa wanted it to be Moulder.

Artur wanted it to be Lute.

Natasha wanted it to be Joshua.

No matter what they wanted, everyone agreed that it would be Ross.

This chapter's levels (in order):

Ephraim; +SKL

Forde; +HP, STR, SKL, LUK, RES

Forde; +STR, RES

Ephraim; +HP, STR, SKL, LUK

Forde; +SKL, DEF

Forde; +HP, SPD

Ephraim; +SPD

Forde; +HP, STR, SKL, LUK, RES

Ephraim; +HP, STR, SKL

Ephraim; +HP, STR, SKL

Ephraim and Forde aren't technically part of the team yet, so they're not going on the table yet.

Let's see if I can not kill this thing by neglect from now on (fat chance).

[Blasied]

Chapter 6: Chapter of shame.

Eirika had been waiting around for a while. She had grown accustomed to someone forcing their way into her group when a fight was about to break out.

No one appeared. Even when some douche put an entire family in mortal peril, no one forced themselves onto the side of justice.

"This is a bad omen..." said Moulder.

And right he was. Since the player had forgotten everything about the enemy layout, Eirika charged off to the right when her rapier would have been a godsend on the left. Shortly after starting, Ross and Neimi were barely holding their intestines in and Gilliam had missed three 80+ hit rates.

Things got even worse as the battle lengthened. Unable to keep up with the demand for healing and keep himself safe at the same time, Moulder exploded. Gilliam having lost his only friend in the group attracted the attention of nearly every enemy on the right side of the map and gave up on the concept of dodging. A shaman killed him.

The left side cavaliers, attracted by the stench of archer failure, ganged up on Neimi. After a terrible level up, her blind rage prevented her from seeing oncoming death and she failed to dodge anything. Even while in a forest.

There were no sighs, no crying, just a slight groan as the Sigh started cutting its wrists.

Joshua and Eirika were the only competent people left after Moulder and Gilliam died. In the end they pulled everyone left through, Eirika saving Ross and Lute from the cavaliers and Joshua dealing with the boss and his remaining right-side cronies.

None of the civilians were saved. No gold star for Eirika today.

ON THE BENCH

Everyone sighed when they heard the news of the deaths.

"I should've put money on him," said Vanessa.

Continuing later, but for now...

Stats!

NAME     LVL   CLASS    HP  Str Skl Spd Lck Def Res Rank
Eirika   13    Lord     23  8   17  17  11  7   5   B Swd
Ross     5     Pirate   27  13  6   8   11  7   3   C Axe
Lute     6     Mage     21  9   9   10  8   4   7   C Anm
Joshua   10    Myrmidon 27  11  14  16  8   6   3   C Swd
Garcia   4     Corpse              DEAD            
Moulder  7     Corpse              DEAD
Gilliam  11    Corpse              DEAD
Neimi    5     Corpse              DEAD             

This chapter's levels were:

Moulder; +HP, MAG, SKL, SPD

Joshua; +HP, STR, SPD

Gilliam; +HP, SPD, DEF, RES

Eirika; +HP, SKL, SPD

Ross; +HP, STR, SPD

Joshua; +STR, SPD, LUK

Neimi; +HP, SKL

Joshua; +HP

Eirika; +HP, STR, LUK, DEF

Ross; +HP, LUK

Lute; +HP, MAG, SPD

Joshua; +STR, RES

That was thoroughly awful.

THE SUBSTITUTES:

Seth

Franz

Vanessa

Colm

Artur

Natasha - acquired

Kyle

Tana - acquired

Innes

Gerik

Tethys

Marisa - acquired

Dozla

Saleh

Cormag

Rennac

Duessel

Myrrh

Edited October 6, 2012 by Blasied

[Kon]

Oh no! I had such high hopes for Neimi and Gilliam. ;-;

[Blasied]

I guess Neimi couldn't handle the Shin level. I was hoping that Gilliam would survive too, he's my favourite character in FE8.

[Thumana]

Team needs a new healer. Get Natasha off the bench.

[NTNP]

Well looks like that made the early game pool pretty shallow. Why don't we add Tana and see if she survives once she joins the group two chapters from now.

[Might Gaine]

Since nobody appears to explained it, a yandere is best summed up as "sweet and lovable on the outside, clingy murdering psychopath on the inside".

Also His Manly Holiness Bishop Moulder I has asked that I add one more thing.

I LOVE THIS THREAD.

[Blasied]

I have one hole left to be filled. If no one throws another unit at me, I will fill it with Seth because I am a complete coward.

[Vicious Sal]

Marisa as a SM