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Feeling Terrible


Elli
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Yea, imean the lighting effects are brilliant and the proportions are nicely done

Now that i think about it, i havent really seen you pn IP Chat Shelie. If ye want, go on and challenge me to a fight

Um what is IP chat is that SF chat room?

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oh

well I have reactive attachment disorder and problems with anxiety and depression

and I can tell you that suicide is gay and dumb

I can't say I fully understand your personal issues and I'm not gonna be a cheerleader and say "don't worry, things will get better!" but I do know for sure that suicide is dumb because it's the end of everything forever and you're giving up the chance of things turning around for you at such a young age

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Yeah I agree suicide is never the answer for anything but my problem is when I completely lose it, I don't even think properly when that happens, All I know then is I am in lots of pain and feel downright awful and when I am like that I literally don't care what happens you wouldn't believe the amount of bruises I have caused myself from hitting things when I am like that., Luckily I have been brought back to my senses every time so far. The only time I usually have suicide thoughts is when I am feeling at my worst. Though I must say I had more thoughts about it regularly as a kid.

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Its exactly that

and plus, there's plenty of people to talk to, except maybe not at this time

It normally gets crowded around 21:00 PM (GMT+1) over there. I am a regular visitor of the chat and it is fun to chat with the members. (Besides, it gave me the advantage of meeting quite some Pokemon X/Y players as well)

Edit

Having suicidal thoughts and giving in to those thoughts are two separate things. Even though I am out of all my depressions, I can't deny that I still get some suicidal thoughts when everything seems to be against me.

Only thing which helps at those times is to try to keep my mind occupied with something else (like gaming or just reading. Taking a walk, or cycle around also helps me clearing my mind)

@Shelie, do you feel a little bit better now? :)

Edited by Soulreaper
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Yeah I agree suicide is never the answer for anything but my problem is when I completely lose it, I don't even think properly when that happens, All I know then is I am in lots of pain and feel downright awful and when I am like that I literally don't care what happens you wouldn't believe the amount of bruises I have caused myself from hitting things when I am like that., Luckily I have been brought back to my senses every time so far. The only time I usually have suicide thoughts is when I am feeling at my worst. Though I must say I had more thoughts about it regularly as a kid.

ya that's anxiety, it makes rational thinking next to impossible

it helps to have a person as a safety net and support

I have my Nathan :newyears:

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It normally gets crowded around 21:00 PM (GMT+1) over there. I am a regular visitor of the chat and it is fun to chat with the members. (Besides, it gave me the advantage of meeting quite some Pokemon X/Y players as well)

Edit

Having suicidal thoughts and giving in to those thoughts are two separate things. Even though I am out of all my depressions, I can't deny that I still get some suicidal thoughts when everything seems to be against me.

Only thing which helps at those times is to try to keep my mind occupied with something else (like gaming or just reading. Taking a walk, or cycle around also helps me clearing my mind)

@Shelie, do you feel a little bit better now? :)

I am feeling a little bit better right now, at least I dont feel like crying right now and having a hundred different things going through my head, though I am a bit annoyed at the fact I cant play games right now after I cut my thumb a few hours ago and had to bandage it up and now cant use it :<

ya that's anxiety, it makes rational thinking next to impossible

it helps to have a person as a safety net and support

I have my Nathan :newyears:

Yeah the only person I have to help me is my mum, I honestly don't know where I would be if I didn't have her...

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I am feeling a little bit better right now, at least I dont feel like crying right now and having a hundred different things going through my head, though I am a bit annoyed at the fact I cant play games right now after I cut my thumb a few hours ago and had to bandage it up and now cant use it :<

that's good to hear. Too bad of your thumb though, I hope it's not too bad.

Yeah the only person I have to help me is my mum, I honestly don't know where I would be if I didn't have her...

^^

Take care is all what I have left to say ;)

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that's good to hear. Too bad of your thumb though, I hope it's not too bad.

^^

Take care is all what I have left to say ;)

Well when I carry things with that hand it now looks like I am giving everyone the thumbs up because I cant bend it, so I guess you could say that's funny haha

And thanks

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Well, I'm not the best helper, or the best advisor, or even the ideal person to get help from, I don't think I can even add anything, but I certainly hope you manage to overcome this ordeal, I hate to see people I like(or at least have a good opinion of) suffer so, you have my support and stuff...

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(it's kind of shitty to guilt suicidal people with "it would be selfish if you did it, think of the people that love you" etc. etc. because whether that's true or not, that might not be completely apparent to the depressed person. every person is different and experiences these things differently though, so for some it may be a help to remind them of what they have to live for, but for others it might serve to make them feel even worse (especially if their depression is related to their self-esteem).)

but!! that has nothing to do with anything. hang in there, suicidal thoughts are just thoughts and you can overcome them. I hope that you can get your mind off of things somehow and slowly, eventually work through overcoming your depression. talking to people really does help and it's so great to have a network of people that will support you even when you're feeling completely awful.

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Just thought I'd put in my 2 cents. I get thoughts like that, but I used them constructively to write lyrics for my songs. Doing that helps me, as it feels like I get something from these feelings, and it really makes them easier to cope with. I'd really recommend trying to use these feelings in someway, be it stories, poetry, songs or anything else. The feelings don't go, but they're not as stressful as before.

EDIT: If it helps I can show you a song or two so you can see what I mean.

Edited by eggs4king
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Its exactly that

and plus, there's plenty of people to talk to, except maybe not at this time

Indeed.

Hang in there Shelie, I went through almost a year of depression last year, and in my opinion the best things to do is talk to someone about it. Like Necro said the IP Chat is always there, and always discuss stuff like this from time to time with others. Also, music is another great thing to do. Sometimes sad music can help, sometimes happy music will work. Quotes can also go a long way, they help convince you otherwise.

It's hard to say much other then that, because i learned this all from my own experiences, and you should too. Think of it as a challenge to face, more than that it's the end, because it's not.

It may feel bad now and it may be for a long time, but trust me, when you get through it, you will be stronger then ever.

Also a random quote (Actually I made this up a year ago, despite not being all that that religious. :/) but:

"God only gives you these problems to face, because he knows that you are strong enough to overcome them."

Edited by Mondei
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Just thought I'd put in my 2 cents. I get thoughts like that, but I used them constructively to write lyrics for my songs. Doing that helps me, as it feels like I get something from these feelings, and it really makes them easier to cope with. I'd really recommend trying to use these feelings in someway, be it stories, poetry, songs or anything else. The feelings don't go, but they're not as stressful as before.

EDIT: If it helps I can show you a song or two so you can see what I mean.

Yeah, I do like to write my own little stories at times... I also like to express myself in art

And I would love to see one of your songs

Indeed.

Hang in there Shelie, I went through almost a year of depression last year, and in my opinion the best things to do is talk to someone about it. Like Necro said the IP Chat is always there, and always discuss stuff like this from time to time with others. Also, music is another great thing to do. Sometimes sad music can help, sometimes happy music will work. Quotes can also go a long way, they help convince you otherwise.

It's hard to say much other then that, because i learned this all from my own experiences, and you should too. Think of it as a challenge to face, more than that it's the end, because it's not.

It may feel bad now and it may be for a long time, but trust me, when you get through it, you will be stronger then ever.

Also a random quote (Actually I made this up a year ago, despite not being all that that religious. :/) but:

"God only gives you these problems to face, because he knows that you are strong enough to overcome them."

Thank you, I try my best to stay strong and overcome different feelings some days though things get to much for me, but I never stop hoping that one day things will get better, I know someday I Will get over this, its just a matter of time...

Edited by Shelie
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Well, i cant say i know whats going on in your head, cuz i dont. Finding release through your art may help you cope. I have a friend who expresses her thoughts and emotions through her balls-amazing art. You got talent there! Let it flow!

Also adorable puppies makes everyone feel better!

87989_o.gif

I can understand how you feel in a way. Sometimes i feel pretty damn terrible because i have viewpoints that are square in the middle of the opinion spectrum. It gets very lonely here, and having people think you are a terrible person for having such views never feels good.

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It is nice to see your feeling better, I find setting goals and while working through them, I think about my life and how I can make it better. Seems like your doing that already through your art! Me, if i try art approach, I just end up with stick figures :) .

Well at least your talking about it on the forums, me on the other hand, I bottles up my emotions and not tell anyone to the point not not feeling much of anything or anyone knows :(

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It is nice to see your feeling better, I find setting goals and while working through them, I think about my life and how I can make it better. Seems like your doing that already through your art! Me, if i try art approach, I just end up with stick figures :) .

Well at least your talking about it on the forums, me on the other hand, I bottles up my emotions and not tell anyone to the point not not feeling much of anything or anyone knows :(

Thank you, bottling them up I find does more damage to me in the end then just letting them out, so if you have things you need to talk about you should find someone you can let it out too. Though I am feeling exhausted and emotionally drained now after being so stressed out yesterday and spent half the day in tears and having anxiety attacks

Edited by Shelie
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