My bowel functions have a tendancy to be rather unpleasent, as in they keep me on the toilet for 3 hours at a time regularly. this is my routine:
Because I am constipated, I can only go every 4-5 days, and when I do, it takes me 3 hours to go. When I get on the toilet, I spend an hour forcing out extremely tightly packed balls. for the next half hour I wait for round 2 to come. When it does, I spend another hour excreting burrning, wet, sludge aka diareah. Then, I spend the last half hour using heavy duty clorox wipes in order to get everything off.