SB plays THE WORST FIRE EMBLEM GAME

[B.Leu]

I'm not sure if the game is that bad, or just that it want to have sex with you. Maybe both, I never played it so...

Those dialogues though, dat bad writing.

Edited August 22, 2015 by B.Leu

[Tryhard]

Actually, FE13 has the most balanced cast on Hard Mode if you play with no-Nosferatu (no-gamebreaking strats please) no-MU (screw Rally Spectrum, OpieOP) no-pairs up and no-reclass (like a true fire emblem!). Anyone can be good, and the game remains hard all the way through the end.

But then you're self-imposing restrictions to not use the broken parts in order to say its balanced - this makes no sense to me.

[Refa]

I'd agree that FE13 has a more balanced character cast than FE12, but that is a pretty bad way of determining that.

[Nintales]

But then you're self-imposing restrictions to not use the broken parts in order to say its balanced - this makes no sense to me.

At least that's a more balanced lunatic than FE12/FE10 could ever dream of. =(

[Triniking1234]

FE3 Chapter 3? u wot m8

everyone knows the mountain is a bad map but imo still better than arcadia

Arcadia would've been as bad as Matthis Mountain but thankfully we have a dancer, Miledy and the power of rescue drop. :D

Will SB even make it Chp. 3?

[charlie_]

In terms of actually being /difficult/, FE12 Lunatic beats out FE13 Lunatic by quite a large margin, but FE13 still lets you use pretty much anyone you want if you give them levels early on, whereas FE12 is a lot more restricting, which is why you'll see pretty much everyone use Palla, Catria, Shiida, etc.

The "maps too big" issue is really compounded by Marth being the only person who can visit villages - I know that FE11 has this problem too, but FE12 requires you to go out of the way for them way more frequently - and also doesn't have Warp to speed it up.

Oh yeah I need to actually play the game.

[spoiler=I CAN BENCH RODY 10/10]

Sadly, we're going back to the 9x6 box maps again this time. At least there are no invisible forests though.

Anyway, we're back to the Luke show (which is fine because he's the best character in the Prologue).

...But nobody else seems to think so.

who the fuck thinks that rody is cool rofl

Realtalk: Katarina is probably one of them. Seriously.

Yeah, it's not nearly ridiculous enough for people to notice you. Despite it being green.

Well, there's probably some chick out there who finds it attractive.

Maybe if you stopped being such a bitch, I would actually like you.

*bullshit map design

I'm just calling it how I see it.

"So, because everyone else quit because it was too hard, we're going to make it even harder so everyone else quits too!"

Good idea, Jagen.

NO, NOT EDUCATION

And here's Frey - back from the dead or something. Aum staff op?

He talks about the prep screen but I'm mostly going to skip it because you should all know it.

The only thing you really need to know right now is that Talk conversations exist but don't really do anything. Everything else is standard Fire Emblem stuff for now.

The first one:

tl;dr, Nyna gave Marth the Fire Emblem and Altea likes Archanea.

The second:

Katarina conscripted another lunatic for us, apparently.

>We need manpower - every soldier counts.

Keep this line in mind.

Also Katarina is an arms dealer because reasons.

The third one:

We learn Paula's backstory and stuff here.

Apparently Jagen knew Paula's grandfather and stuff. Yeah. I don't have anything to say about this conversation either.

>we need the manpower

>benches half of our units

Seems legit.

So, who's ready to get wrecked?

Katarina fangirling aside, this dude is scarier than Jeorge. You'll see in a minute.

Also, Cecille is here now. And more importantly, she brought WEAPONS.

Since Paula doesn't have one of those right now.

She'll bring a Sword for herself, a weapon for your MU, and another Sword/Lance/Bow because of the first three recruits I guess.

Cecille is probably the worst of the three cavs just because she joins later, but she's not bad I guess. I'd still use her over Rody because fuck Rody.

Here's Ogma - he will destroy you. What you see here is actually one of the weakest Ogma's that can spawn. Since the enemies are autoleveled, he can actually proc more stats than what you see here. If he gets 15 speed, he would actually double Luke as well, and then Shiida would be the only person who could tango with him without getting destroyed.

...Not that he needs to. I'm good at this.

I actually swapped in Gordin because I realised that Wrys was useless here. I chunked the dude on the bridge down with Mages so that Luke can kill the fighter and tank Ogma and the archer if he has to.

In reality, the archer goes for Paula because he's an idiot, and nothing else can get a kill either.

Cecille still tries to fuck over the chapter for me though, as shown by this miss.

Luke wrecks Ogma and gets a good level for it. That skill though.

After he Ogma dies, we just need to clean up. He also calls us amazing.

LATER THAT NIGHT, ANOTHER ROUTE SPLIT APPEARS

Following the pattern, clicking yes is the better option and gives you Cain. I still hate myself, so I'm gonna say no.

But it upsets Katarina, so it's all worth it in the end.

NEXT TIME, THE LAST BOX

[Squidmark Iggy]

OH HEY

EST

SHE'S GOOD RIGHT??????

[Tamanoir]

who the fuck thinks that rody is cool rofl

Well, now that I think about it...

[spoiler=Prologue 8]

It's all part of Katarina's plan :

Insinuating that the worst cav is the best one, and mocking the superior one, such giving herself an advantage in the Prologue 8 Battle if you listened to her.

It all makes sense now !

Edited August 23, 2015 by Tamanoir

[eclipse]

Katarina's telling you what she thinks of Ryan/Luke/Rody. Which means that benching Rody is for the best, before she goes super-creeper on him.

[Tryhard]

rody missed a 97 in 2rng and died and i will never forgive him for that - well he was dead anyway

[Refa]

Est saves more turns than Cain man.

[Triniking1234]

Est saves more turns than Cain man.

Fiendish slander.

[MacLovin]

i remember wanting to like fe12 with the reclass and mu.

but the boring maps and shitton of useless characters kinda killed it for me lol.

[charlie_]

[spoiler=AGAINST THE BEST]

It might be the final test, but my suffering will never end.

At this point the writers got lazy because they threw about 5 screens of text at us and then BOOM CHAPTER

Sadly, there are still a lot of words to go through before starting the chapter.

The first:

Marth comes here to lecture but doesn't even know what he's here to do. Good shit.

tl;dr convo: arhanea is cool, hardin is the man, nobody likes katarina

Onto the next one:

I wonder why her whole platoon deserted?

Aaaaand the game shits on Luke again, sadly.

The third:

Katarina realises how nobody likes her and cries.

But the power of love is enough to sustain her. Or something.

And the last one:

Marth is sad that people die when they are killed. I guess FE11 didn't have casual mode.

Paula says he shouldn't worry about it, this doesn't change Marth's mind, etc etc.

At least he's aware that it's kind of stupid.

But then Paula says "yeah sure we'll do that lol" and that's pretty much the conversation.

Anyway, the map!

This is still a box, but it's a slightly larger box so it's clearly better! The terrain in this map is pretty annoying because of how restrictive it is, tbh.

And now we have to fight THE BEST. I don't think I have her stats anywhere, but the important thing to know is that her speed is the same as Shiida's 4 chapters ago so she's not really a huge issue.

The basic strategy here is to sweep around the top side, in order to prevent some reinforcements from spawning later on and making everything go to shit. I get some decent levels out of it. Luke tanks the bottom side to prevent the merc from murdering Wrys.

He and Shiida swap it around on the next turn, and I take advantage of Archers only having 5 move for some reason and murder the Merc.

Not pictured: Wrys blocking the top fort.

Reinforcements spawn on turn 3, which is also the time Est starts moving (before then, she will do nothing even if you stand right next to her.

I'd make a joke about this being calculated, but in reality it was just me fucking up. I think it was salvagable though, since I could have Shiida and Luke tank.

Ogma drags Est closer and misses... which doesn't help, but I can still clean up.

And this is why I'm not using you, Merric.

But yeah, map clear! All of the stupid training missions are over!

Was there ever any doubt about this?

People are celebrating, and Cecille is a weirdo.

You two aren't allowed to join in, nobody likes you.

LATER THAT NIGHT

Sadly, there is no escape from Katarina.

Hooray for SLAVES (iirc)

Well, I was probably right.

And then she basically became a slave to a different person. Okay.

Considering the last 7 chapters happened, that was kind of a stupid question.

Well, that was abrupt.

BUT THEN SHE WON'T LEAVE US ALONE

I don't know why she gave it to Katarina and not Paula herself, but okay.

Every few chapters, something like this will show up and you'll be able to change your hair. I'm gonna say yes and then probably switch it back.

Yeah, it's fun having mediocre offense and shitty defensive stats. Just ask Samto.

NEXT TIME, THE END

OF THE PROLOGUE

THERE'S STILL A TON OF STUFF AFTER THAT I HATE EVERYTHING

[SilverHairedFreak25]

The prologue is long, we become bullet monkeys for Marth, Katarina has a hardon for the Avatar.

tl;dr

There needs to ba a patch that allows you to skip the prologue.

Edited August 25, 2015 by SilverHairedFreak25

[Jedi]

There needs to ba a patch that allows you to skip the prologue.

Then you wouldn't get any of the characters in the prologue levels, and in stuff like lunatic they kinda need them lol.

[Psych]

FE12 is filled with units who are basically Wendy on higher difficulties.

Because it's basically the Ruby Destiny of Fire Emblem games. In exchange for adding a bunch of features that don't matter (who gives a fuck about barracks seriously) and making it look pretty, you get terrible balance and map design.

It's not like FE3 had better balancing.

. . .and it took me a while to figure out why, too.

Back when FE3 came out, there were a bunch of units that were cut. Many of 'em came back, even though life would've gone on just fine without them. Throw in the BSFE guys and the Shadow Dragon gaiden people, and there's a gigantic cast to be had.

Cut it down to the originals in FE3, and it'll look a bit less unbalanced (I say "a bit", because Roshea sucks in both versions).

you know, i never thought about that actually but it makes sense that you'd only use the people who were re-added if you liked them especially

[charlie_]

It's not like FE3 had better balancing.

90% of the units who were added back from FE11 are complete shit, so FE3 has better balance if you look at it that way. I haven't actually played FE3 though so maybe I'm wrong, but I'm assuming I'm not considering Shin loves FE3 and also hates FE12 soooooooo.

[spoiler=SOMEONE MADE WORDS]

Welcome to the chapter that things actually start happening in!

Kinda.

Here's the hair change. Katarina likes it, so obviously I don't.

Luke is still the best character. I'm actually kind of sad the Prologue is almost over, because he's not gonna show up outside of talk conversations for the rest of the game.

But at the same time fuck these Prologue maps, so I'm not really that sad.

People who don't matter also tell Paula she's amazing. Yeah.

please no shipperino i hate this woman

Katarina acts weird and then we go to the ceremony.

Marth knights us individually, and then tells everyone else "oh lol yeah you guys too".

People celebrate, except for Katarina.

Aaaand the castle is under attack. Neat.

Jagen goes off to fight or something. He could probably impale half of the enemies on his spikes so I guess he'll be okay.

Aaaand then bombshells drop. Except not really because Katarina has been acting weird forever, but still.

Does this mean we get to kill her now if she's a villain?

Please tell me that we get to kill her.

"I'm evil."

"I don't believe you!"

And then we find out that she's an assassin. Okay.

"Don't do the thing you were knighted to do - run away and be safe!" Good logic, Marth.

Luckily, Paula isn't a complete moron.

Everyone else does the "yeah we're doing this too" thing even though Luke is the only one who isn't getting permabenched.

ryan you're 8 years old go to bed

Anyway, PREP TIME

First off, a talk:

"wtf is this shit"

"idk lol"

D-does this mean I get to murder her?

This is the best day of my life.

Anyway, here's Est. She's pretty much worse than Shiida, but I'm bringing her along anyway because she can double mages and hunters.

Gordin is being benched, if you couldn't guess.

Insane guy is still here, anyway. Cutting the update here because I have TOO MANY PICTURES.

Edited August 25, 2015 by SB.

[charlie_]

[spoiler=DON'T LEAVE THE CORNER]

The enemies on this map are pretty tough and clustered together, with attack ranges overlapping a lot. Since a lot of our units are 2HKOed, this is a huge issue.

That's why my strat for this map is mostly to sit in a corner and take on enemies as they charge us. A lot of them are passive to begin with, so you can do this pretty safely if you don't want to risk drawing half the map towards you at once.

The thieves die without much issue, and Luke gets an amazing level. 12 Speed is actually important here, because it pushes him into doubling range of the slower enemy types.

Marth is tanky enough to lure out two other guys, so he does that and then everyone backs away again because we can't actually kill them without attracting a Silver Axe bandit. I hate this game.

Next turn is cleanup, mostly.

Paula misses on enemy phase which sucks a little bit, and means I get to go cry in a corner again.

This is actually hard to clear out, especially since Wrys and Paula are ORKOed by some of these guys. If she procced speed here, things would've been easier, but...

At least Ogma is the man.

The thief was weakened so Paula could kill it on the counter and not get doubled, since there wasn't really another way for me to do it.

And NOW we bait the Silver Axe guy, causing a bunch of other units to move, and causing me to run back to my corner.

I know this map isn't a 9x6 box like some of the others, but it feels like it at times.

Even now, getting into movement range of these dudes is scary, so I just end up walling the last mage off.

Shiida doesn't know what strength is. Wrys finally got magic though!

Anyway, we're finally down to Katarina. The thieves to her sides won't move until she does, and she moves when you get into attack range. She has a TON of magic and elfire, so nobody can really tank her and a thief.

This means you need to take her down quickly if you want to live, or manipulate the AI again.

Luckily for me, Luke is a god. This is a clean ORKO. Katarina is dead for good, and-

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE DOESN'T ACTUALLY DIE

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Screw you, game.

Cleanup from here is easy, and MU gets a good level, but fuck I wanted Katarina to die.

please don't remind me about her i just want to forget

Marth is dumb, but what else is new? Also nobody knows who the assassin could be.

After Katarina's betrayal, shouldn't you pick like... a veteran who you can trust? Not some newbie who was (unwillingly) best friends with the traitor?

If by help, you mean kill, then sure.

Cecille is still confused and also asks us about the headband.

I don't know why all of you like her so much.

With THE BEST leaving us however, this may be Altea's darkest hour.

If by "a long time ago" you mean one year ago, sure.

If you're making an offer with that face, I'm afraid I'm going to have to pass.

Ogma is going places too, sadly. It was nice having another Luke around.

Yeah, Game Overs suck.

Merric is also leaving, so Paula isn't overshadowed by him completely anymore!

fuck off gordin why are you here

Wrys is leaving too, so I guess Rody will have to be reclassed to Curate. It's not a huge loss.

Get two levels, promote and reclass to Thwomp. Easy.

Well uh, that's kind of what knights do, Shiida.

NEXT TIME, THE REAL FUN BEGINS.

Edited August 25, 2015 by SB.

[SilverHairedFreak25]

It's not like FE3 had better balancing.

FE3 is arguably the most balanced FE of all, simply because the Star Shards have the potential to make anyone viable.

[Triniking1234]

Paula needs to stop flexing her muscles and start flexing whatever part of her body that could raise her magic stat.

[Psych]

FE3 is arguably the most balanced FE of all, simply because the Star Shards have the potential to make anyone viable.

You can say the same about FE5 and look how easy it is to trivialize that.

[Baldrick]

A lot of that comes from the various broken personal (or pseudo-personal) weapons. All the best units in FE3 have are stats.

Characters who join after chapter 14 in FE3 are SOL, but it's a lot easier to boost them into competency than in FE12.

Edited August 26, 2015 by Baldrick

[charlie_]

I keep trying to update, until I remember that I really don't want to play this game.

[spoiler=TEXT DUMP]

The tl;dr of all of this is "FE11 happened, but sorry you're playing this abomination instead".

But now Hardin is in control of Archanea and stuff.

Aside from the whole "assassins trying to murder Marth" incident.

WE DID IT GUYS

WE MADE IT TO CHAPTER 1

IT ONLY TOOK 7 MORE CHAPTERS THAN IT SHOULD HAVE

Tbh Altea didn't seem to be in a particularly bad state in FE11, but what do I know?

Except for all the Marth/Merric yaoi fans rip

We can't have nice things in FE12, apparently.

"Large scale" huh.

Keep this in mind.

And we're totally bringing our entire army.

"Let's leave our second strongest unit at home because #yolo."

Oh. I forgot to mention this in the Prologue, but like Lyn mode, units would only retreat if killed off. You would lose 1000 gold from the starting funds though, which is probably more than Rody's life is worth.

I bet Marth would play CASUAL MODE if he was given the choice. He's such a scrub.

And now we have more options open in the prep screen. Hooray I guess.

We also have two talks.

First:

To kill people. Duh.

Except Marth is lame. Also,have a flashback.

This conversation is going to look really weird to anyone who walks in on them. Why do they both have their eyes closed?

Did... nobody think of this before?

Luke is still a boss, Rody and Cecille both still suck and Ryan turned 9 yesterday!

And by "main force" he means our only force.

Here's Arran, our substitute Jagen. He has aids or something idk.

Actually, they kind of wreck him.

Eventually isn't too far off, to be honest. Luke is already pretty close I think.

But yeah, reclass is unlocked now. Meaning we can do very important things like...

Curate Rody! Because we need a healer with Wrys gone.

Merc Luke, because gottagofast.

Draug gets a horse, because being a knight kind of sucks.

And finally, Gordin gets turned into the less awful bow class.

NEXT TIME, THE ACTUAL CHAPTER

Because this was already a ton of screenshots.

[TheMoniker]

Those reclass gains look really, really weird.