screenshot lp The League shall fall if I'm in control - A bad tactician plays Berwick Saga, Ironman mode!

[The Roger The Paladin]

31 minutes ago, This boi uses Nino said:

By your description you met Edgar, prince of Figaro. It was the palace into the desert. Did you get to *that* cutscene in the desert palace? Well if you don't know which then I'll just keep it as a surprise because it's a very fun cutscene.

If you mean the one I think, I may just have posted it in his last LP after a reference he didn't get. Or at least a certain highlight.

10 minutes ago, Benice said:

Cursed.

It's called cross promotion. I make reference to one thread in another thread and then perhaps people from one thread will read the other one. Or think I'm being paid. But I'm not.

So I had another idea for a song. Which is more a running gag being beating into the ground thing. But anyway... the song's from "The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad". The song is the one Brom Bones sings about a certain... decapitated individual. You know who I'm talking about. Anyway, I realized how inexplicably similar it is that Ichabod Crane is so traumatized by.... well you see where this is going. Hopefully our good LPer won't mind.

Spoiler

Just gather round, and I'll elucidate,
On the things that Ruben hates.
There's the edgelords and FE7's incongruity,
When it comes to Elibe's continuity,
There's Ambush Spawns, and Pengauis' replies,
And Merlinus' rants about traps and spies,
(There's Pretzel,
And Slaver's Milk,
And in Echoes there is using Silque)
I'm telling you readers, I'm gonna cement,
The things that Ruben is sure to lament.

Now when the Saint begins a new LP,
You'll get some chaotic RNG,
Now one percent crits are bad,
But what makes him curse,
Are those raiding horsemen,
They're the worst.
(That's true, the do, make him blow a fuse)

Now when they appear, upon a map,
Old Ruben here, is gonna snap,
Because they caused him minor strife,
It seems he's been scarred for life.
(Be afraid they'll raid if their hand is not stayed)

And they're there to rush your turns,
Cause if you're slow then a town will burn,
The sound of hooves fill Ruben with dread,
Those horsemen got him seeing red.

They say Kaga was feeling mean,
Invented them to vent some spleen,
So now they ride into the nearest village,
Forget their class and start to pillage.

Are they an error, or are they a trick?
Designed for terror by the sick?
Glitch, or bug, or oversight?
To Ruben they're a bane and blight.

If New Mystery is being played,
They're out making it their trade to raid.
And if you're not quick your fate is sealed.
You can forget about that Draco Shield.

Now if you doubt this tale is true,
Give Ruben's first LP a view,
You'll find these most evil fiends,
Lurking in chapter fifteen.
The map called Return of The Prince
They've haunted our Saint ever since.

So there you have it my good fold.
The beginnings of our running joke.
Each LP the gag gets reprised.
And leaves poor Ruben traumatized.

If New Mystery is being played,
They're out making it their trade to raid.
And if you're not quick your fate is sealed.
You can forget about that Draco Shield.


(The song is The Headless Horseman for those who need it. Yep. Song about a Horseman that traumatized a character, turned into a song about horsemen traumatizing someone. I thought it too poetic not to do. Sorry Ruben)

 

[Benice]

14 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

It's called cross promotion. I make reference to one thread in another thread and then perhaps people from one thread will read the other one. Or think I'm being paid. But I'm not.

By the way here's the five dollars I owe you for the cross promotion

17 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

So I had another idea for a song. Which is more a running gag being beating into the ground thing. But anyway... the song's from "The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad". The song is the one Brom Bones sings about a certain... decapitated individual. You know who I'm talking about. Anyway, I realized how inexplicably similar it is that Ichabod Crane is so traumatized by.... well you see where this is going. Hopefully our good LPer won't mind.

90% of people who comment on this LP: Lol RIP Christine.

The Roger the Paladin: Allow me to write an opera to demonstrate my feelings on the death of Christine.

[The Roger The Paladin]

7 minutes ago, Benice said:

 

The Roger the Paladin: Allow me to write an opera to demonstrate my feelings on the death of Christine.

But Christine's neither headless, a horseman (albeit because that would require her to be male), or involved in raiding villages. That said, I did squeeze a good 16 songs into last LP... and we're now at three (four if you count that silly Mr. Ed segment) this time. Also jokes about editting the Batman theme into "Bagman" and taking out notes from the Thomas the Tank engine theme to make Tom the Tank's theme. I think we're at the point where this is my thing. I mean, other than punning things. But that's incReesingly became a thread thing, so it's realLee not something I can take a Lot of credit for.

[BrightBow]

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This bad boy has the best durability rank a weapon can have without being unbreakable, a whopping 16 might, low-ish weight, and it's not just brave, it's triple brave. That's right - this grants Sherpa not one but two extra rounds, amounting to an absolute minimum of three hits. You know, three 29 attack hits. It does have two minor downsides: 50% hit is okay, but not ideal, and it cuts Sherpa's avoid by 50. It floors at 0, but he'll still be a sitting duck while using it - but one hell of a sitting duck.

It helps that Sherpa's sword base is just plain silly. Guy has 11 more points over Faramir.

But good grief, who thought "You know what a Greatsword needs besides skyhigh attack? Two additional attacks."?
Right now a single swing of Sherpa with a Greatsword is enough to one-shot some enemies and leave everyone else with very little HP. It's so silly.
 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

- Counter is kinda like Vengeful, only there's no increased damage, but it's guaranteed to happen every time. If Sherpa misses the counter, though, he might get doubled. Still, great skill to have.

Not that this is a very likely scenario, given that very few enemies are faster then him in the first place.
 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Her damage is underwhelming at the start, but just wait till she gets her personal orb and some magic. Speaking of, no, the liquid magic item I'm aiming for at the atelier is not for her. She'll have to muster up her own power.

It's so strange that her magic base is so low. Considering the multi-hit property, the effectiveness of Wind is based on the power of the user rather then the Orbs. Which leads to this weird situation where every mage with access to Wind uses it more effectively then she does. She seems like a better fit for Fire, which has much more raw power and accuracy. Of course her Fire growth is complete garbage, so that's not going anywhere.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know I'm a huge sucker for magic, so here, have a gif. Even the basic wind tome, man. Even that is visually amazing. Take notes, FE.

I mean, right now they might as well look at their old games to see what things could be like.
Funnily enough, as impressive as Radiant Dawn's spell effects are, mages are also weaker then anywhere else in the series. It's a pretty funny contrast.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay Rosalie. But keep in mind, it wouldn't exactly reflect well on Sherpa if he were to take a 14 year old out for nightly shenanigans like that.

Edit:

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So, you know how a few updates ago I said I was playing FE3? Well, guess what; I got bored, so now I'm playing Radiant Dawn instead.

Radiant Dawn, huh? The game where they decided to make the writing worse on purpose. They genuine thought good writing would hurt the game's success and it needed to be simplified and dumped down. Something tells me the people pushing for that back then have a lot more pull in the company these days. Because god, would this explain a lot.

Maybe you know about that, but Radiant Dawn's script has two versions: The proper one, which is Maniac Mode exclusive. And the dumped down one, which is in every other difficulty level. And of course they only localized the dumped down one for the international releases.
It sucks that to this day so much of my opinion on Radiant Dawn's story is based on a script that's been shit on like that.

And isn't it just great how the proper version of the script can only be found on Maniac mode? As if there is a correlation between people wanting an extremely difficult gameplay experience are the ones who want to enjoy a good story.
But I'd imagine this has more to do with making a compromise. Something like: "Sure, you can have the good version of the script in the game, but it will be hidden somewhere where most people won't actually see it."

Sorry if I tell you stuff you already know. I just think it's important to keep in mind that the game's writing had been deliberately kneecapped.

Edited April 29, 2020 by BrightBow

[eclipse]

"Hey Reese, I took your princess out for a wild night on the town.  No hard feelings, right?"

[Pengaius]

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't believe it! You really are there! HR Ruben, what the heck is the meaning of this?!

I'm what's called a tax write-off. 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, I know: he's an excellent meme and so you want to stan him, but I like him, so your desire to be a memelord conflicts with your desire to be my archnemesis.

Firstly ouch. Second, not really, good vibes does not mean meme unit, Navarmoured over there has nice vibes, but he lacks Arkis' flair, which brings him down comparatively. Also your opinion on a unit is a non-factor in their vibes, it's just that so far I have not seen enough good vibes to seriously consider as stan material. A good frame of reference, ask yourself if this character would be fun at a party. 

Anyhow, not a Serra fan and Sherpa's a cuck (HAWKWING DO NOT LOOK THIS UP)

[Hawkwing]

On 4/27/2020 at 2:03 AM, Aethin said:

(Kept in spoilers for those who want to guess.)

Spoiler

Likes: Yum!

Neutral: Tasty.

Dislike: Why?

Also, that's pretty hilarious that he actually makes a noise due to the food being so bad. I've mentioned it before, but things like this would be cool to see with voice acting.

Looks like I was off on a few of them, but hey! Guessing is part of the fun!

On 4/27/2020 at 2:03 AM, Aethin said:

That is a simple yet clever twist on the "masked person expressions" meme.

On 4/27/2020 at 2:03 AM, Aethin said:

I... don't think you can be in a coma for a day. Although he may have been knocked unconscious. Considering how ambiguous the game is about how much time passes, either may have been the case.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

:

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

:

Ah, TRS airplane mages. Been a while since we last saw them.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't believe it! You really are there! HR Ruben, what the heck is the meaning of this?!

Do you even have an HR Ruben?

Or are they the person that replies to, well, the replies?

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Rajoy couldn't speak a lick of any foreign language even though he was the leader of a country, didn't know why rain happens, could not speak to save his life (much less to a crowd), and was an obviously corrupt politician. What a man.

Then again, all of the other spanish politicians are the same, with the added downside that I cannot laugh at them. It's... a sad situation, to say the least.

Don't most politicians have those same traits? With the exception of famous historical politicians, but they tended to end up in wars all the time.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Can I just use this chance to recommend Tintin to everyone? They carry the "for kids" stigma, as always, but they're pretty amazing. And they have Haddock in them. Just like Eugen's presence in TRS, that is a selling point in and of itself. Like, seriously, I like the entire series, but it just gets 10 times better when that man appears.

“Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”

― C.S. Lewis

I remember seeing the Tintin series at the library before, though it's been a long time since I was last there. I'll take a look next time I get a chance

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I have no idea what either of those things are. The only time I've played a Final Fantasy, it was VI, but I dropped it shortly after meeting the, uh... the blond guy? Was he a prince? I can't remember... the desert palace? How far into the game even was that?

You got farther than me. I started playing before realizing that I downloaded the wrong Final Fantasy due to their strange numbering shenanigans and didn't understand a lick of the tutorial. Though then again, I never really managed to get into JRPG's. Or RPG's in general, for that matter.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

She's a hilarious character, all right.

I wish. I can see her character working, but they seriously screwed it up and I don't think she even has that many good black comedy moments. Doesn't help that despite the voice acting of Fates being hit or miss, I would say that it has the funniest battle dialogue of the 3DS games.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh...

You're going to love it. Just... just trust me on this one.

I shall prepare some popcorn and the Mortal Kombat gifs.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, that cannot be. I'd remember if you did. It's remarkable enough!

Both times it was dealing with Kaga's bullcrap in your LP's.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

How many times have you mentioned Eugen? I will not take a lower number than all the rest combined, so if the result is unsatisfactory, I demand that you open up a thread that's just Eugen's name repeatedly.

44, not counting things in spoilers or saying it multiple times in the same post.

You've mentioned him 14 times outside of LP updates.

I might post that topic later today. Depends on how tired I am after writing.

EDIT: AAAAAAAAnd once again I get distracted when looking up jokes I never ended up using, even if most of those were more for reference anyway.

Which somehow led to me watching videos about medieval archery and what Arnold Schwarzenegger thought about his previous roles in movies. As well as being reminded of Arknights when watching a Fire Emblem meme, and out of curiosity looked up what the game was about, to find out it was a tower defense gacha with a story, which reminded me of Blustone 2, which made me sad about the little phone space I have. Also, Vodobanaka updated again, and I'm tempted to retry every level on the new difficulty because it's a quirky SWAT game and I haven't played it in a while despite perfecting every level of the free version.

Also, I played board games with my younger brother, and we're playing Secret of Monkey Island together. Which is part of the reason why this reply took so long.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What do you mean, "otters"?

Googling

...oooooohhhhhhh that's an otter. Hah.

YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHAT AN OTTER WAS?!?!?!?!

*Ahem*

They're one of my favorite animals, and they're a lot of fun to watch at the zoo.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Uh, let me think about it... I'm... not sure if he has, actually. That may be an IntSys original. Hurray...?

Henry was pretty popular for a while, and he fell into the category of not taking death all that seriously. There are times I laugh at the guy and times I'd like to punch him (often both), but overall I'd say he was a well-done example of the trope.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is mostly how I felt about it. The hatred stems mostly from the unwarranted praise everyone gives it (which, admittedly, is starting to fade, thank God) and the inmense amounts of unrealized potential.

I am curious on seeing what a sequel would look like. While there are a few mechanics I wouldn't want to become series staples, it would be interesting to see them improved and expanded upon in the future. Which I'm expecting because that's how Fire Emblem sequels tend to roll, but still.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I've heard about him, the fabled Sniper final boss. Gotta hand it to them, that is extremely unique.

While I prefer giving archers more than 2 range since it gives them a distinct niche from mages, I won't deny that the power boost Fates gave them definitely made the class more viable. It made their inability to attack at 1 range feel more like a necessary drawback than an unfair handicap, and Conquest leaning towards player phase action did them a ton of favors.

Also, counter on an archer is one the the most ingeniously cruel yet fair things I have seen in Fire Emblem.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ouch... okay, the tidbit about the bolding and underlining kinda hurt.

I warned you that it was kind of mean-spirited.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Also also, I am not that fat and my suit doesn't blend into my chaOHMYGOD THAT IS NOT A BIG CHAIR THAT IS HIS FUCKING BACK BLISTERING BARNACLES CHRIST WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT MAN

That's the Kingpin. He's essentially a criminal mastermind that has the strength of a sumo wrestler.

Seriously, he doesn't bother putting a lock on his safe because the door is so heavy only he can lift it.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Honestly, I can't say I'll miss it that much. I don't usually mind it, but in Tellius I outright despise it. Ashnard's bullshit plot armor doesn't just force a second imhullu/starlight out of nowhere (BK was enough, thanks), it also makes one of the most incredibly badass battle quotes in the entire series inconvenient to see and impossible to carry through.

Quote

Ashnard: Is that you, Tauroneo? As I thought... You betrayed me after all.
Tauroneo: ...
Ashnard: In my father's time, there was a man who was one of the Four Steadfast Riders. That man grew old and useless, and retired from the front lines. How does his story end, you ask? Come, let us write it together.
Tauroneo: Oh, my king... In all of Daein's history, perhaps no other ruler has used the talents at his command to the degree you have... But all the same, no other king has chosen a path so incredibly stupid.
Ashnard: Heh heh heh... Will history judge me to be just or evil? We will not know until all of this is finished.
Tauroneo: ...Now that I've confronted you and traded words with you, I have come to a decision. Throughout Daein, I, Tauroneo, will be known as the king killer. Come! Let me earn my name!

Seriously. If he could've killed him after that, it would've been such a great moment. But nope! Gotta have little Ike get all the glory, because the developers really loved their male Faye! Heck, I almost believe that they only made it an option to let Tauroneo do that in Radiant Dawn so he could finally earn his name! In the saddest way possible, but it's more than PoR let him have!

I've heard that Tellius is the king of boss conversations, and I see that reputation is not unearned.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah... well, some may judge you, but I won't. Politics are depressing, and when all the choices are terrible, it's kind of disheartening to try and make a difference.

It doesn't help that most of the issues I care about aren't resolved by politics. Along with how you cant really pick a side without being overloaded by extra baggage that I either don't care about or even despise.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahah... this is gonna be your new pastime, ain't it?

I was expecting it to be, and I am not disappointed.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Was it a word in Eugen's dictionary? No, was it? There's your answer.

It isn't a word in my dictionary either. Only "fall back for a little while, heal up, and immediately attack again."

Also, I wanted to use this meme last time, but it didn't say "tactical withdrawal" like I thought it did:

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, they were neat, the four times I ever used food in that game.

In hindsight, I would have added an extra inventory slot just for food. That way, it could serve a function as a healing item without having to give up the ability to wield a more useful weapon/item.

Food is more useful in the final and post-game dungeons, due to both of them being marathon levels that don't have a ton of Mila statues (heck, the latter doesn't even have any at all). Also, Alm has a solo section to give him some extra levels before having to finish off the final boss, which predictably, isn't a good thing for his stamina.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Come to think about it, he also did another thing first: as you accumulate deaths, the gravekeeper gives you some items. Not nearly unique or good enough to kill off units for them, but they're a decent compensation, I suppose. What I'm trying to say is, Kaga did Shadow Dragon gaidens first.

Unpopular opinion, but after playing through Shadow Dragon, I actually wouldn't mind seeing the mechanic come back. With some heavy adjustments in the numbers and having alternative ways to get the characters of course, but I' am interested in seeing another go at it. Or heck, tjust to see another more ironman friendly Fire-Emblem game after SoV and Three Houses.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The Erzheimer quest in a nutshel:

I was planning on making this meme, but figured that someone would probably beat me too it.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Anyway, this is Sherpa. He looks a lot like Guts from Berserk, up to and including his combat animations. Considering how old and influential Berserk is, it would not surprise me if Kaga meant to reference that with Sherpa here. His personality is a completely different story, though.

Don't know a ton about Berserk, other than it's bloody, gory, has rape, Guts was on a boat for a while, there's a moon resource called Femto which DAEMON X MACHINA references, a certain scene is similar to Thanos getting the Soul Stone in Avengers: Infinity War,  the final season of Samurai Jack shares a lot of similarities with it, and one of the anime shows had terrible animation.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

We cannot simply leave! Those mongrels stole the sacred orb of Pallas Riana from me!

Fancy name. Must be a fancier weapon.

Didn't find anything on the name, except for a reddit post saying that Three Houses has a lot of features from Tear Ring and Berwick Saga.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, that's exactly the sort of thing you should say to the mercenary who has just saved your life.

If Sherpa was a different kind of mercenary, then she pretty much just told him one way he could make some extra side cash.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hahahahahaha... haha... haaaa

I could be mean and say how Fire Emblem has allowed players to turn the "fragile/delicate/girly" characters into combat monsters with enough dedication since the beginning, but honestly, the sheer amount of games that have casts that don't look very threatening but kick a ton of butt caused this quote to get a long laugh out of me.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A highlander, eh? I know next to nothing of the series, other than they're supposedly immortal, one of the swords that's put together in pieces would break quickly in an actual fight, and the sequels suck.

Also, Brymranger just brought up Bewick Saga stuff. It is a pretty unique idea for a weapon, though.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know I'm a huge sucker for magic, so here, have a gif. Even the basic wind tome, man. Even that is visually amazing. Take notes, FE.

Ah man, I nearly forgot how awesome TRS/Berwick saga's magic looked. And this is just the basic stuff. Can't wait to see what the heavy hitters look like.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I tried to make a funny gif, but I'm afraid he's, uh, not quite as graceful as...

It's a damn shame this game isn't more well known among spriters. This animation is very smooth and powerful.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yoda.

Hahahahahaha

Still, I don't know if anything can beat this.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

E-Eeeeeek! A-An enemy!? An ambush! Rosalie, how could you...!

..., .... ....! . ..... .. .... ... .... .... .... .. ... .. .... ......!

Why, hold lady! I hired to free you from Raze .... .. ... .. .... ......!

Nay, hold lady! I shall be your ... .... .... .... .. ... .. .... ......!

I'm blanking on the rest.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Will you stop speaking already!?

.... .... . ...... ...... .... ...

Hmph like I always gabber like you.

Eh, I'll go with that.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes! Derrick can do it! Uh, unless he uses his shield. Then I'm shit outta luck. But I believe in Derrick!

By the way, that is one badass armor sprite. Like, he looks legitimately threatening.

Armor designs have largely been hit or miss in the series, but when they hit, they really hit.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...., . ......!

Drat/Darn/Damn/D'oh/What, I missed!

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He steps back to dodge. In total, it must be like 3 frames of animation. Expect me to miss it every time. I mean, I miss all the popups that stay onscreen for five seconds...

Given Sherpa just rotates his arm to dodge, it seems like this game ranges in how much effort it gave the dodge animations.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

His swing is pretty hilarious. He does this, basically. The second one, obviously. Couldn't get the timer to match up perfectly.

I see Faramir went to the "spin for a normal attack" school of thought.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I like how he has his off-hand on his hip while slashing. He'll murder you dead, but he'll look fabulous while doing so.

Looks like Sylvis isn't the only showoff in the game.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This will get old when I say it's gotten old!

I still don't get this joke, and I've kind of accepted that I won't by now.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, my friend who reads Berserk said that there aren't that many similarities between the designs of Sherpa and Berserk's protagonist. I beg to differ.

Anyway, he deletes the guy.

Regardless, I'd say that I love this guy's design and animation. It manages to be pretty simple yet surprisingly awesome

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Faramir is one dramatic boy with his bow. Has to turn his back to the player and everything.

Not entirely unlike Sylvis.

Wonder if they shared the same animator.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It opens unceremoniously after that beating. Gonna guess they just smashed the lock? But why would there be a lock on a fort gate... I mean, there has to be a lock, Czene could picklock this gate! What gives?

Maybe they were better off using a ram. Or shooting the hinges off the gate.

Maybe Czene unlocks the door by climbing over the wall and lifting the lock on the other side?

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, that was a complete failure.

The enemy dashing in animation is so uncommon that I actually wondered when you recruited a guy named Lennox for a moment there.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That is a hilarious dodge. He looks like he's dancing! Really uncomfortably dancing!

Looks like he's trying to do a conga line by himself. Or he has invisible maracas.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why won't you fools ever surrender... Disaad really was the greatest mind in the Raze Empire.

Maybe the option to surrender becomes more appealing when you don't have any weapons?

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah, yes! I love this game's capture system, I really do. The one friggin' flaw... but at least this goes to prove my integrity as an ironmanner. I could've just as easily savescummed that and pretended I didn't. Aren't I just the bestest LPer ever?

I do appreciate how you admit your mistakes. Even if sometimes you blame them on Holmes or the RNG.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm... hoping he's meaning he has some creative date ideas and not the other kind of "wild time".

Also, I can't get Sabers voice out of my head whenever I see this guy speak. Considering they're both one-eyed mercenary swordsmen that guard a princess, I can't say that I am really surprised.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Curious what direction this side story will take.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The plot thickens...

4 hours ago, Pengaius said:

Anyhow, not a Serra fan and Sherpa's a cuck (HAWKWING DO NOT LOOK THIS UP)

It's an adulterous man or someone whose weak and servile in the field of politics.

I am more adverse to learning about what people do behind closed doors. Although I also have little interest in that area of life in general.

[The Roger The Paladin]

41 minutes ago, Hawkwing said:

That's the Kingpin. He's essentially a criminal mastermind that has the strength of a sumo wrestler.

Seriously, he doesn't bother putting a lock on his safe because the door is so heavy only he can lift it.

Which is pretty stupid in a world full of super-heroes (not that I ever remember him doing that in the comic... I do remember him crushing a guy by dropping an extremely large rock on him after he reported bad news though). But seeing as we're on the subject, I always found it hilarious the way they'd insist the Kingpin's mass was all muscle despite looking like fat to the point of having a double chin. (this is not what a muscular man looks like) My favourite example being from an early Spider-man story. In spoiler brackets for space.

Spoiler

First he reminds himself it's all muscle. Then two pages on...

He's calling him a bag of blubber.

 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

Drat/Darn/Damn/D'oh/What, I missed!

D'oh I missed would be a good old Mario Party reference. So probably that.

[BrightBow]

7 hours ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

D'oh I missed would be a good old Mario Party reference. So probably that.

Do people still think that's what Wario said and not "So ein Mist!"?

Edited April 30, 2020 by BrightBow

[Golb89]

Quote

Sorry, not sorry:

(And yes: after years of lurking i finally registered an account here just for this...)

[Benice]

On 4/29/2020 at 3:23 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

A-Aegina!? With Goebbels right there?! That is suicide! I sent FARAMIR once, and he died horribly! How did you pull that off?!

I don't exactly remember, but I believe it was send Faye forwards to dodgetank all of those infernal Gastraphetes wielders, (I mean, 19 AS helps you dodge a lot.) then charge with Adel, who Vantaged everything at 0 range, at which point I sent Aegina through the tunnel because there wasn't that many threats anymore near the boss. (Thankfully, Goebbels had already used his turn.) I also had a miracle charm on Aegina.

RIP Goebbels, he was a good man.

2 hours ago, Golb89 said:

And yes: after years of lurking i finally registered an account here just for this...

Welcome to the forest!

[Saint Rubenio]

Part 17 - Extremely short update.

The replies of this:

Spoiler

On 4/29/2020 at 3:40 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Remembering I only know the mine's owner... and have never been anywhere near it because that'd require going out to some god-forsaken region.

Still...

I mean, a character that's basically a fighter... but with less strength growth than all but six cast members in Birthright. She shares her 25% growth with Shura and Yukimura. She beats out Setsuna, Felicia, Orochi and Izana. If you want to be generous base Rhajat as well. Noting that barring Setsuna, those units all are best used with magic... and Rinkah's even worse with that at 15%... yeah. That said.. her defense growth is a stellar 45%, the highest any base defense gets in Birthright. So, yeah. Probably right up your ally for tanking at least. That said, you'd be lucky to have her doing the offensive job her class implies.

Who cares about that? I mean, remember Lot? He had no strength either, but it didn't matter because I could just throw him anywhere and he'd live!

Well, its only natural the embodiment of greed would want everything, including the throne... and to eliminate those that stand in his way. You don't have to be noble or heroic to hate Volcens. You just have to deal with him.

I'm fine with that.

Edgar. Barely into the game. I think there's one boss and one tutorial boss before that. Also a walk to the desert.

That seems about right. Though I also distinctly remember finding the Shadow fellow in a tavern right before I quit, so... I don't know. It was many years ago, my memories of the game are shaky.

He also had a degree of difficulty to him, mostly from the map design. Mind, relative compared to other final bosses... like the much mocked Formortiis.

I mean, FE final bosses range from "piss easy" to "eh". So it's okay to be merely "eh". It's as good as it gets.

Not to mention he just Navarre's out in his ending.

Oh, God...

Oh don't put him in the same category as Oliver. His keeping living beings as prisoners is literally watered down Slaver to me.

Well, at least you get to pick his fate. With the Slaver, he's spared no matter what because he's Kaga's self-insert.

Also, I love that he gets all the special supports of Radiant Dawn. It's so dumb, but the best kind of dumb, in my opinion. You can bet I'm gonna use him, if I make it that far in RD. No funny videos, sadly, because I don't think I can beat this.

Glare-rick isn't real, he can't harm you.
Glare-rick:

Bwahahahahahahahah... sorry.

Reminds me of Roy's neutral b in smash for some reason. Maybe it's the that pink glow effect.

Could be.

What if Derrick was like Kenny from South Park, and all his dialogue was vulgar but we didn't know it? Maybe I'm thinking too much on that Volcens joke from earlier on.

Bwahahahahahahah... well, you never know.

He's a highlander and he just went down a cliff with magic... does that make him immortal? (reference explained in spoiler... by video).

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Why... why is a plastic cup...? What...?

They're learning what not to do. Which in some ways helps more.

I guess so, but...

Is it bad I missed this?

Ahahahahah... I knew there'd be at least someone!

So if there's Lott.exe, Zalwade, Garo (who needed no change due to sharing a name with spooky ninja ghosts in Majora's Mask), what is Sherpa? Sherpa Scissornads?

It's Faramir, not Sherpa. Fearamir, to be precise.

Not gonna touch the obvious joke with a ten foot pole.

Actually, it was an accident. I only realized the implications afterwards. I could've changed it, but as you know, I am spanish.

Dewrecked.

How exactly do you pronounce "Derrick"? Dewrreck?

When you realize everything you love about this game is because of an attempt to avoid a lawsuit. Ironically, it took both Kaga and Nintendo to make your favourite Fire Emblem/Kagasaga. Even if neither quite planned it that way. Who knew lawsuits could be so much fun?

It's kinda like Valery being happy about the war because it brings him moneys. I don't want to be happy about the lawsuit, but it did bring about Berwick Saga...

We memed it so hard it became true.

Urgh...

She kind of reminds me of Serra for some reason. Maybe it's the fact she's a magic user who is hard to get along with and has pink(ish) hair. Unlike Serra though, she's not a total caricature. Come to think of it, Serra lied to Florina about being a princess who was left in an orphanage... this is an orphaned princess... and Rosalie does look like Florina. Huh. Surely a coincidence. No crackpot theory for this.

Uh... no, I... I do not see it. You want an actual clone of Serra? Go and take a look at Three Houses's most popular waifu. It's literally a recycled design, a recycled name, even her personality is half recycled. You know, she's Linhardt only without the smart and more manipulative? How Hilda became the next Camilla is completely beyond me.

Oh wait, right, the boobs.

...she doesn't even have the best boobs in the game...

Unless @Benice talks you into doing a pseudo-crossover with his own LP.

No man. He's LPing FE7. I cannot come close to that game. I am allergic, you see.

 

On 4/29/2020 at 5:32 PM, This boi uses Nino said:

I agree. It has questionable writing and it's really easy to break but the maps look good atleast. It was made by just one person, so I won't critique it very harshly.

Neither will I, but... yeah.

Well shucks.

What can I say, I tend to get bored of pure RPGs. It was the same with Chrono Trigger. Everyone calls it a masterpiece, but then I played it and it was piss easy the entire way through. Then I got to Lavos and it was also piss easy, but so absurdly long that I ran out of healing items. When I realized I'd have to grind for more healing, I just... never touched it again.

Still, it's more than I can say about most other pure RPGs I've tried out. I made it all the way to the final boss. Without doing a single sidequest, but still. Better than FF.

Even the games that I did enjoy back... I couldn't finish my last run of Mother 3 (admittedly I was playing the fanmade hard mode), and in Octopath Traveler I finished the quests of my main four and unlocked the four "superclasses", but then I couldn't be bothered with the sidequests or the other four travelers.

By your description you met Edgar, prince of Figaro. It was the palace into the desert. Did you get to *that* cutscene in the desert palace? Well if you don't know which then I'll just keep it as a surprise because it's a very fun cutscene.

I... have no idea. It was many years ago.

That was like 30 minutes into the game, it took me like an hour when i first played it but regardless it's still very early into it.

Hmm... well gee, I sure lasted a long time.

Atleast Roy has the excuse of being a curious kid, not that it makes reading the story any better. But yeah, I definitely wish other characters were expanded more on in FE6.

I would've been fine with anyone but Merlinus. He's so unbearable in FE6...

🙂 -> :0 "tri jauses"

I'm just thinking about all the english speakers in the thread who are no doubt confused as to why you just randomly went "tree jawsees".
 

  Reveal hidden contents

You know I'm a huge sucker for magic, so here, have a gif. Even the basic wind tome, man. Even that is visually amazing. Take notes, FE.

Looks incredible, I love it.

Of course! And it'll only get better from here.

Also GAAAAAAAAH IT FINALLY HAPPENED! I knew it would... I finally called orbs "tomes"! And here I was doing so well, never mistaking spears for lances...

Lmao.... that's absolutely hilarious.

That's right, you haven't played TRS or watched the previous LP. The fact that there's a swordmaster called Yoda that has that animation is news to you.

This is effectively a participation award lol.

Hey! If Derrick wanted to, he could wipe out the earth! He just has mercy.

Ahh those swings are always so much fun to watch...

Yes, indeed.

This is my first time seeing this and it's already as old as your reflexes.

Urgh...!

"Blistering barnacles!"

Yeah that.

It really does! LOL

The Lennox dance.

 

On 4/29/2020 at 6:20 PM, Benice said:

You can help by donating to my Don'tFundMe to help stop mistreatment of Benices everywhere.

Unluckily for you, I was on my phone, so when I held down the link it showed me the youtube link.

...then I did it anyway because I like the song.

I'm more of the eLeet of humankind than elite.

That's the best kind of human.

TEN THOUSAND THUNDERING TYPHOONS IN A SEA OF BILLIOUS BLISTERING BLUE BARNACLES, READ THE TINTIN SERIES!

I CONCUR, BLISTERING BARNACLES!

R.I.P Wolff.

What a hero he was, in the end.

I also had no idea that the other bad guy in the novel was called Jordan. I knew he was in King Ottokar's Scepter, but I totally forgot his name.

Jordan? He's called Jorgen in the spanish version.

...also in the english version, but I can understand the blunder.

Anyway, Jorgen's interesting because he's, I'm pretty sure, the only villain in the series that is killed and you can clearly see his corpse. And then he got thrown into space.

Man, the Moon duology was the heaviest Tintin story, wasn't it? You know, the twins's hairy drama notwithstanding. But I'll admit, I like the twins also. Heck, I'm not sure if there's a Tintin character I don't like. Even the villains, I love to hate.

They must have realized that their map design was on the bRinkah of disaster, so they decided to make conquest instead but forgot to hire a writer.

They understood they did not require a writer because they had Camilla's big Cammies to draw in all the buyers. And it worked, considering her popularity.

As for me, I do not fall for those lowly tricks. Map design is my only waifu! Map design!

...Although, if Leonie looked more like this, I'd probably join the "Three Houses best game" crowd. Alas, they had to be cowards and make everyone look like a vapid supermodel. Puagh!

...still, Catherine does exist... Faculty once again proves they're superior to the students in every way...

I quite liked RD's switching perspectives, but I do think Ike was a little too much the focus of the story IMO. You probably already know this, but TRAIN IKE! The game will be impossible to finish if you don't. Literally.

Yeah, I never liked the "only protagonist can kill bad guy" nonsense. It keeps me from making funny videos. Like Hicks. Sorry I keep pestering everyone with this. I'm just... so proud of it...!

Incidentally, I've noticed that Hicks hits Veld almost to the beat of his own theme. That just makes it even better.

I do love the magic animations in this game, but OH MY GOOD GRAVY GOSH GAWD THE DARKMEND ANIMATION IS SLOW. The light animations are too, but at least the map animations are fast.

I honestly don't care if they're slow, I can always just speed up the emulator, and the light show's so pretty.

Cursed.

Right? That's what I said!

 

On 4/29/2020 at 7:05 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

If you mean the one I think, I may just have posted it in his last LP after a reference he didn't get. Or at least a certain highlight.

Is it the Kefka scene?

It's called cross promotion. I make reference to one thread in another thread and then perhaps people from one thread will read the other one. Or think I'm being paid. But I'm not.

I mean, you keep mentioning me in other threads. Usually by bringing up my unusual boss kills. Last time I think it was the Murdock kill by Marcus?

So I had another idea for a song. Which is more a running gag being beating into the ground thing. But anyway... the song's from "The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad". The song is the one Brom Bones sings about a certain... decapitated individual. You know who I'm talking about. Anyway, I realized how inexplicably similar it is that Ichabod Crane is so traumatized by.... well you see where this is going. Hopefully our good LPer won't mind.

I didn't even need the name to know exactly which song it was.

  Reveal hidden contents

Just gather round, and I'll elucidate,
On the things that Ruben hates.
There's the edgelords and FE7's incongruity,
When it comes to Elibe's continuity,
There's Ambush Spawns, and Pengauis' replies,
And Merlinus' rants about traps and spies,
(There's Pretzel,
And Slaver's Milk,
And in Echoes there is using Silque)
I'm telling you readers, I'm gonna cement,
The things that Ruben is sure to lament.

Now when the Saint begins a new LP,
You'll get some chaotic RNG,
Now one percent crits are bad,
But what makes him curse,
Are those raiding horsemen,
They're the worst.
(That's true, the do, make him blow a fuse)

Now when they appear, upon a map,
Old Ruben here, is gonna snap,
Because they caused him minor strife,
It seems he's been scarred for life.
(Be afraid they'll raid if their hand is not stayed)

And they're there to rush your turns,
Cause if you're slow then a town will burn,
The sound of hooves fill Ruben with dread,
Those horsemen got him seeing red.

They say Kaga was feeling mean,
Invented them to vent some spleen,
So now they ride into the nearest village,
Forget their class and start to pillage.

Are they an error, or are they a trick?
Designed for terror by the sick?
Glitch, or bug, or oversight?
To Ruben they're a bane and blight.

If New Mystery is being played,
They're out making it their trade to raid.
And if you're not quick your fate is sealed.
You can forget about that Draco Shield.

Now if you doubt this tale is true,
Give Ruben's first LP a view,
You'll find these most evil fiends,
Lurking in chapter fifteen.
The map called Return of The Prince
They've haunted our Saint ever since.

So there you have it my good fold.
The beginnings of our running joke.
Each LP the gag gets reprised.
And leaves poor Ruben traumatized.

If New Mystery is being played,
They're out making it their trade to raid.
And if you're not quick your fate is sealed.
You can forget about that Draco Shield.


(The song is The Headless Horseman for those who need it. Yep. Song about a Horseman that traumatized a character, turned into a song about horsemen traumatizing someone. I thought it too poetic not to do. Sorry Ruben)

What the hell are you apologizing for? That was beautiful. You took the corpse of this dead joke and used the Aum staff on it.

Also, to this day I still cannot get over how perfectly imperfect that Hunger Games thing was. A horseman scared me off, both versions of me died anticlimatically after doing absolutely nothing, Butterman cuddled with Eugen, Maerchen and Lentzie died the exact same death one after the other, the entire reader base committed mass suicide, and then Arkis won, of all people. It's like the RNG was out to get me even there...

 

On 4/29/2020 at 7:25 PM, Benice said:

By the way here's the five dollars I owe you for the cross promotion

You...! You're worse than Valery!

90% of people who comment on this LP: Lol RIP Christine.

The Roger the Paladin: Allow me to write an opera to demonstrate my feelings on the death of Christine.

Ruben: I swear to God, Butterman, if you start with your puns, I'm going to find out where you live and wring your neck with my bare hands. I'm not kidding, you bastard! I will murder you dead! And your pet! And your family! And your friends! I will obliterate all until not even the memory of your existance remains! BUTTERMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!

Butterman: ha ha Crushtine go ded

 

Anyway, that's The Roger for ya. I'm glad to have him around.

 

On 4/29/2020 at 7:45 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

But Christine's neither headless, a horseman (albeit because that would require her to be male), or involved in raiding villages. That said, I did squeeze a good 16 songs into last LP... and we're now at three (four if you count that silly Mr. Ed segment) this time. Also jokes about editting the Batman theme into "Bagman" and taking out notes from the Thomas the Tank engine theme to make Tom the Tank's theme. I think we're at the point where this is my thing.

It totally is your thing. I look forward to each song.

I mean, other than punning things. But that's incReesingly became a thread thing, so it's realLee not something I can take a Lot of credit for.

Ah, yes, that other thing... that apparently I started...

 

On 4/29/2020 at 10:43 PM, BrightBow said:

It helps that Sherpa's sword base is just plain silly. Guy has 11 more points over Faramir.

Sherpa is the personification of Kaga's "balance is my passion" quote. Is that even his quote? I see it thrown around a lot, but I don't think I've ever seen concrete proof that he said such a thing.

But good grief, who thought "You know what a Greatsword needs besides skyhigh attack? Two additional attacks."?
Right now a single swing of Sherpa with a Greatsword is enough to one-shot some enemies and leave everyone else with very little HP. It's so silly.
Sherpa in general is silly. Now watch as I get him killed because I'm me.

Not that this is a very likely scenario, given that very few enemies are faster then him in the first place.
That much is true. I was just struggling to find a downside to Sherpa.

It's so strange that her magic base is so low. Considering the multi-hit property, the effectiveness of Wind is based on the power of the user rather then the Orbs. Which leads to this weird situation where every mage with access to Wind uses it more effectively then she does. She seems like a better fit for Fire, which has much more raw power and accuracy. Of course her Fire growth is complete garbage, so that's not going anywhere.

She's a weird mage, for sure. But, she works.

I mean, right now they might as well look at their old games to see what things could be like.

Absolutely. At least graphically. But everyone knows my opinion on the matter, I don't need to parrot it again.

...

......

Three Houses bad Berwick Saga good. There.

Funnily enough, as impressive as Radiant Dawn's spell effects are, mages are also weaker then anywhere else in the series. It's a pretty funny contrast.

Oh yeah, mgic in RD is actually quite pretty. Thani is the bomb.

Okay Rosalie. But keep in mind, it wouldn't exactly reflect well on Sherpa if he were to take a 14 year old out for nightly shenanigans like that.

Oh right, I'd forgotten. This being Kaga, everyone is underaged.

Edit:

Radiant Dawn, huh? The game where they decided to make the writing worse on purpose. They genuine thought good writing would hurt the game's success and it needed to be simplified and dumped down. Something tells me the people pushing for that back then have a lot more pull in the company these days. Because god, would this explain a lot.

Maybe you know about that, but Radiant Dawn's script has two versions: The proper one, which is Maniac Mode exclusive. And the dumped down one, which is in every other difficulty level. And of course they only localized the dumped down one for the international releases.
It sucks that to this day so much of my opinion on Radiant Dawn's story is based on a script that's been shit on like that.

And isn't it just great how the proper version of the script can only be found on Maniac mode? As if there is a correlation between people wanting an extremely difficult gameplay experience are the ones who want to enjoy a good story.
But I'd imagine this has more to do with making a compromise. Something like: "Sure, you can have the good version of the script in the game, but it will be hidden somewhere where most people won't actually see it."

Sorry if I tell you stuff you already know. I just think it's important to keep in mind that the game's writing had been deliberately kneecapped.

I did know this. It does baffle me. Why hide away half the script like that? And it's not all - didn't the Soren reveal require that you use Soren in PoR, get him an A support with Ike, then transfer the data to RD? Am I imagining things? 'Cause I could swear I read that somewhere.

 

On 4/29/2020 at 11:45 PM, eclipse said:

"Hey Reese, I took your princess out for a wild night on the town.  No hard feelings, right?"

Bwahahahahahahah... Well, I don't think he'd mind too much. You see, there is only room for one princess in Reese's heart.

 

 

 

His sister

 

On 4/29/2020 at 11:48 PM, Pengaius said:

I'm what's called a tax write-off. 

Uhh... all right, let's go with that.

Firstly ouch.

What? Have I said anything that isn't true?

Second, not really, good vibes does not mean meme unit, Navarmoured over there has nice vibes, but he lacks Arkis' flair, which brings him down comparatively. Also your opinion on a unit is a non-factor in their vibes, it's just that so far I have not seen enough good vibes to seriously consider as stan material. A good frame of reference, ask yourself if this character would be fun at a party.

...but... that doesn't-- Derrick hasn't said a single word! How can you know if he's fun at parties!?

Also, this does not add up. Eugen was the most fun part of that one party where he kicked Holmes's drunken ass, and yet you never stanned him. Your methods are faulty, Butterman!

Also also, how do you want me to know if a character would be fun at a party? I've attended like four parties in my life, and each time I got bored because everyone got drunk off their asses and I don't drink! I'm no fun at parties! You should know that well, considering you've done the complete opposite of stanning me since the start!

Anyhow, not a Serra fan and Sherpa's a cuck (HAWKWING DO NOT LOOK THIS UP)

Why is everyone obsessed with this notion that Aegina is like Serra? They look nothing alike! Pink hair is not that uncommon! What, are you gonna start calling Makalov a Serra ripoff, too?

 

On 4/30/2020 at 4:17 AM, Hawkwing said:

  Reveal hidden contents

Likes: Yum!

Neutral: Tasty.

Dislike: Why?

Also, that's pretty hilarious that he actually makes a noise due to the food being so bad. I've mentioned it before, but things like this would be cool to see with voice acting.

Looks like I was off on a few of them, but hey! Guessing is part of the fun!

Always.

That is a simple yet clever twist on the "masked person expressions" meme.

Derrick is as expressive as he's talkative.

I... don't think you can be in a coma for a day. Although he may have been knocked unconscious. Considering how ambiguous the game is about how much time passes, either may have been the case.

Why are you questioning the funny meme?

Ah, TRS airplane mages. Been a while since we last saw them.

I think there may be a Berwick Saga airplane mage. But he won't show up for a bit.

Do you even have an HR Ruben?

Or are they the person that replies to, well, the replies?

Hey, Ruben from the HR room here. Yes, I exist.

There you have it.

...you know, at this point I've just realized, which one of my many iterations is the one that writes everything? Everyone else introduces themselves before speaking, except for me. Who am I...!?

Don't most politicians have those same traits? With the exception of famous historical politicians, but they tended to end up in wars all the time.

Yes, politics are a tragedy in general.

“Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”

― C.S. Lewis

Words to live by.

I remember seeing the Tintin series at the library before, though it's been a long time since I was last there. I'll take a look next time I get a chance

You can get a book, and if you enjoy it you can get the rest. The episodes are mostly self-contained, with a few references to past adventures scattered around, and a couple of stories that consist of two books. So you could really start anywhere, except for the second part of the aforementioned two-book stories.

If you want to do it chronologically, though, don't start with Tintin in the Congo. The book is... weird. Really weird. Disturbing even, at times. Completely unlike the rest of the series, it's very much a product of its time (the 30s), and that is not a compliment. Even Herge himself ended up hating it in later years. Even if you manage to find it (it seems it's rarer than the rest, though I do possess a copy), I wouldn't recommend it, to be honest.

Tintin in America, the next book, is still a bit wonky, but it's where Herge started to improve. The Cigars of the Pharaoh is what I'd call his first truly great Tintin book. So my recommendation would be to start with Cigars and perhaps leave America for a bit later.

You got farther than me. I started playing before realizing that I downloaded the wrong Final Fantasy due to their strange numbering shenanigans and didn't understand a lick of the tutorial. Though then again, I never really managed to get into JRPG's. Or RPG's in general, for that matter.

Bwahahahahah...

I'm of a similar opinion. I don't know, but turn-based RPG combat is just... not my kind of thing. The few RPGs I do like are the ones that shake things up in the combat. And the story is not enough of an incentive - I could just watch a playthrough for the story.

I wish. I can see her character working, but they seriously screwed it up and I don't think she even has that many good black comedy moments. Doesn't help that despite the voice acting of Fates being hit or miss, I would say that it has the funniest battle dialogue of the 3DS games.

I see...

I shall prepare some popcorn and the Mortal Kombat gifs.

You do that.

Both times it was dealing with Kaga's bullcrap in your LP's.

Ahahahah... of course, it was to be expected.

44, not counting things in spoilers or saying it multiple times in the same post.

Hmph... not sure if that is enough.

You've mentioned him 14 times outside of LP updates.

And inside the LP updates?

I might post that topic later today. Depends on how tired I am after writing.

No, please. 'twas a joke. It'll be deleted.

EDIT: AAAAAAAAnd once again I get distracted when looking up jokes I never ended up using, even if most of those were more for reference anyway.

Of course.

Which somehow led to me watching videos about medieval archery and what Arnold Schwarzenegger thought about his previous roles in movies. As well as being reminded of Arknights when watching a Fire Emblem meme, and out of curiosity looked up what the game was about, to find out it was a tower defense gacha with a story, which reminded me of Blustone 2, which made me sad about the little phone space I have. Also, Vodobanaka updated again, and I'm tempted to retry every level on the new difficulty because it's a quirky SWAT game and I haven't played it in a while despite perfecting every level of the free version.

Of course! It's very you! Very Hawkwing.

Also, I played board games with my younger brother, and we're playing Secret of Monkey Island together. Which is part of the reason why this reply took so long.

Ah, board games. I enjoy the more complex ones, but I barely ever have the chance to play anything board.

YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHAT AN OTTER WAS?!?!?!?!

I'm not a native english speaker! Don't kill me with a chair...!

*Ahem*

They're one of my favorite animals, and they're a lot of fun to watch at the zoo.

I can understand that.

Henry was pretty popular for a while, and he fell into the category of not taking death all that seriously. There are times I laugh at the guy and times I'd like to punch him (often both), but overall I'd say he was a well-done example of the trope.

Modern FE characters are difficult to find in Kaga's work. That's because Kaga loved using tropes from old animes, the likes of Gundam and LoGH, whereas modern FE seems fonder of Isekai tropes. Which isn't bad, I guess, but... harem animes aren't my thing.

I am curious on seeing what a sequel would look like. While there are a few mechanics I wouldn't want to become series staples, it would be interesting to see them improved and expanded upon in the future. Which I'm expecting because that's how Fire Emblem sequels tend to roll, but still.

I'd just like them to actually give half a fuck about the maps the next time around. That's all. Not asking for too much, am I?

While I prefer giving archers more than 2 range since it gives them a distinct niche from mages, I won't deny that the power boost Fates gave them definitely made the class more viable. It made their inability to attack at 1 range feel more like a necessary drawback than an unfair handicap, and Conquest leaning towards player phase action did them a ton of favors.

To tell you the truth, I still find Berwick Saga archers to be a bit more powerful than Three Houses's and Echoes's, despite the lack of increased range. Helps that mages are so different, rather than just "better archers".

Also, counter on an archer is one the the most ingeniously cruel yet fair things I have seen in Fire Emblem.

Hahahaha, and then everyone has it in 3H, making bows the plain best weapon type.

I warned you that it was kind of mean-spirited.

That you did, didn't you... you fasteriskcking damnedorganhead...

That's the Kingpin. He's essentially a criminal mastermind that has the strength of a sumo wrestler.

Seriously, he doesn't bother putting a lock on his safe because the door is so heavy only he can lift it.

I've seen a bit of him before. It's a weird concept, but okay, I'll take it.

I've heard that Tellius is the king of boss conversations, and I see that reputation is not unearned.

Oh, absolutely. The only thing that beats it is the final boss of The Last Promise, who has a battle conversation with literally EVERYONE in the army.

It doesn't help that most of the issues I care about aren't resolved by politics. Along with how you cant really pick a side without being overloaded by extra baggage that I either don't care about or even despise.

There's that, too.

I was expecting it to be, and I am not disappointed.

I'm glad.

It isn't a word in my dictionary either. Only "fall back for a little while, heal up, and immediately attack again."

Hwahahahah... that is one way to view it.

Also, I wanted to use this meme last time, but it didn't say "tactical withdrawal" like I thought it did:

Ahahahah... ah, the Penguins of Madagascar. Their show was one of the things that I watched as a child when Code Lyoko wasn't on. It was really weird.

In hindsight, I would have added an extra inventory slot just for food. That way, it could serve a function as a healing item without having to give up the ability to wield a more useful weapon/item.

Yeah, normally I just prefered to take a weapon.

Food is more useful in the final and post-game dungeons, due to both of them being marathon levels that don't have a ton of Mila statues (heck, the latter doesn't even have any at all). Also, Alm has a solo section to give him some extra levels before having to finish off the final boss, which predictably, isn't a good thing for his stamina.

I see... I'm afraid I didn't make it that far.

Unpopular opinion, but after playing through Shadow Dragon, I actually wouldn't mind seeing the mechanic come back. With some heavy adjustments in the numbers and having alternative ways to get the characters of course, but I' am interested in seeing another go at it. Or heck, tjust to see another more ironman friendly Fire-Emblem game after SoV and Three Houses.

Well, with any (un)luck, we'll see a softer alternative in this very LP. Three deaths to go for the first item (Esteban doesn't count).

I was planning on making this meme, but figured that someone would probably beat me too it.

It was me!

Don't know a ton about Berserk, other than it's bloody, gory, has rape, Guts was on a boat for a while, there's a moon resource called Femto which DAEMON X MACHINA references, a certain scene is similar to Thanos getting the Soul Stone in Avengers: Infinity War,  the final season of Samurai Jack shares a lot of similarities with it, and one of the anime shows had terrible animation.

Guts was on a boat for 10 years, to be precise. 10 years in real time, the creator just took "a break". I pity anyone who expects to see the end of the story in their lifetime.

Didn't find anything on the name, except for a reddit post saying that Three Houses has a lot of features from Tear Ring and Berwick Saga.

I see. Aethin, context, please.

If Sherpa was a different kind of mercenary, then she pretty much just told him one way he could make some extra side cash.

You...? You're the one who made the joke? What is this, opposite day?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hahahahahaha... haha... haaaa

I could be mean and say how Fire Emblem has allowed players to turn the "fragile/delicate/girly" characters into combat monsters with enough dedication since the beginning, but honestly, the sheer amount of games that have casts that don't look very threatening but kick a ton of butt caused this quote to get a long laugh out of me.

Matthis. That is my answer.

Still, Sherpa does have a point in the context of this game. Aegina can never become a frontline fighter. She gets murdered by everything.

A highlander, eh? I know next to nothing of the series, other than they're supposedly immortal, one of the swords that's put together in pieces would break quickly in an actual fight, and the sequels suck.

Uh... ok.

Also, Brymranger just brought up Bewick Saga stuff. It is a pretty unique idea for a weapon, though.

Also an absurd idea. So overpowered...

Ah man, I nearly forgot how awesome TRS/Berwick saga's magic looked.

I won't let you!

And this is just the basic stuff. Can't wait to see what the heavy hitters look like.

Hahahahah... well, I may show the Pallas Riana next update, even if I don't deploy Aegina when I actually play through the map.

It's a damn shame this game isn't more well known among spriters. This animation is very smooth and powerful.

That's all the animations in the game, really. Very, very smooth.

Hahahahahaha

Still, I don't know if anything can beat this.

Ahahah, good old Yoda. It's difficult to beat him, yeah.

Why, hold lady! I hired to free you from Raze .... .. ... .. .... ......!

Nay, hold lady! I shall be your ... .... .... .... .. ... .. .... ......!

I'm blanking on the rest.

"Hey, calm down! I meant no harm... it's just hard to see in this helmet!"

Hmph like I always gabber like you.

Eh, I'll go with that.

"What have I gotten myself into..."

Armor designs have largely been hit or miss in the series, but when they hit, they really hit.

Heck yeah. And just you wait till we see some generals. Some... unplayable... generals, because nobody promotes to the class and it's mostly used for enemy commanders...

Drat/Darn/Damn/D'oh/What, I missed!

C'mon, man. As soon as you figured out the "d'oh", that should've been a really easy guess.

Given Sherpa just rotates his arm to dodge, it seems like this game ranges in how much effort it gave the dodge animations.

Meanwhile, Lennox dances.

I want a playable Imperial knight, now.

I see Faramir went to the "spin for a normal attack" school of thought.

Looks like Sylvis isn't the only showoff in the game.

Not at all, no. Though it doesn't fit his personality as much...

I still don't get this joke, and I've kind of accepted that I won't by now.

It was originally just a parody of bad creepypastas. Then it grew.

Regardless, I'd say that I love this guy's design and animation. It manages to be pretty simple yet surprisingly awesome

Yes, indeed. I agree.

Not entirely unlike Sylvis.

Wonder if they shared the same animator.

I'm not sure. I'd have to pay attention to the credits to tell you.

Maybe they were better off using a ram. Or shooting the hinges off the gate.

Maybe Czene unlocks the door by climbing over the wall and lifting the lock on the other side?

I guess that is, one explanation. The other one is that Czene is secretly swole.

The enemy dashing in animation is so uncommon that I actually wondered when you recruited a guy named Lennox for a moment there.

It's not really uncommon in this game. Whoever starts a melee fight in this game, friend or foe, dashes toward their target. I just haven't taken many screenshots of enemies running.

Looks like he's trying to do a conga line by himself. Or he has invisible maracas.

Pfffff...

Maybe the option to surrender becomes more appealing when you don't have any weapons?

I guess you've got a point.

I do appreciate how you admit your mistakes. Even if sometimes you blame them on Holmes or the RNG.

Hah, well, I try to be humble. Mistakes in FE are almost always on the player, and could be avoided 99% of the time. I just find it hilarious that my luck fails to save me most of the time. Others coast through FEs purely thanks to luck. I can't.

I'm... hoping he's meaning he has some creative date ideas and not the other kind of "wild time".

I think Rosalie's the one we should be worried about, given her implied personality.

Also, I can't get Sabers voice out of my head whenever I see this guy speak. Considering they're both one-eyed mercenary swordsmen that guard a princess, I can't say that I am really surprised.

They're really different, though. I can't remember Saber ever being sassy.

Curious what direction this side story will take.

Just wait and see.

The plot thickens...

It does! In... exactly the same way it always does: dark sorcerer in green robes. I am original!

It's an adulterous man or someone whose weak and servile in the field of politics.

Wow, you actually know! Wait, but why the field of politics...?

I am more adverse to learning about what people do behind closed doors. Although I also have little interest in that area of life in general.

A fair point of view.

 

On 4/30/2020 at 5:34 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Which is pretty stupid in a world full of super-heroes (not that I ever remember him doing that in the comic... I do remember him crushing a guy by dropping an extremely large rock on him after he reported bad news though). But seeing as we're on the subject, I always found it hilarious the way they'd insist the Kingpin's mass was all muscle despite looking like fat to the point of having a double chin. (this is not what a muscular man looks like) My favourite example being from an early Spider-man story. In spoiler brackets for space.

  Reveal hidden contents

First he reminds himself it's all muscle. Then two pages on...

He's calling him a bag of blubber.

That is absolutely hilarious. I don't understand, though. Why slowly bend his hand rather than just snap it like a twig? He seems like he'd be capable of doing that.

D'oh I missed would be a good old Mario Party reference. So probably that.

Yes, it's that. Obviously.

 

On 4/30/2020 at 12:23 PM, BrightBow said:

Do people still think that's what Wario said and not "So ein Mist!"? Wario was voiced by Thomas Spindler back then, who is German.

I know that, of course, but it's a lot more fun to think that it's "D'oh, I missed!"

...Incidentally, I humbly believe that Spindler's Wario was better than Martinet's. Martinet's Mario and Luigi are unbeatable, but I think his Wario is a little worse than Spindler's. I don't know, Spindler's Wario sounds more original, in a way.

 

13 hours ago, Golb89 said:

Sorry, not sorry:

What? Oh, goddamnit. I did it again... accidental plagiarism...

Out of curiousity, what exactly is this? A game, an anime... both? 'Cause I've never seen it before. Hmm, let me google it...

......

Okay, it's both.

(And yes: after years of lurking i finally registered an account here just for this...)

Ey, welcome! I'm honored you chose this place to begin posting. Not sure if you've lurked in my LPs or the forum in general, but either way, enjoy your stay.

 

10 hours ago, Benice said:

I don't exactly remember, but I believe it was send Faye forwards to dodgetank all of those infernal Gastraphetes wielders, (I mean, 19 AS helps you dodge a lot.) then charge with Adel, who Vantaged everything at 0 range, at which point I sent Aegina through the tunnel because there wasn't that many threats anymore near the boss. (Thankfully, Goebbels had already used his turn.) I also had a miracle charm on Aegina.

I am NOT trying this strategy.

RIP Goebbels, he was a good man.

Goebbels, a man so epic he made it to the OP of Aethin's translation thread. The picture may or may not have been taken and suggested by me.

Welcome to the forest!

Yes, indeed!

 

Are longer than the update:

Spoiler

Last time, Derrick went on his first mission. It was glorious. Today, Aegina finally meets Reese.

I am Reese of Sinon. I heard of your circumstances from your handmaiden Rosalie. I am terribly sorry to hear the news regarding your parents' passing.

...Lord Reese, has your father said anything to you regarding me?

Well, well, straight to the point, I see. Sadly...

I know that your father and mine were close friends. However, I know very little in particular aside from that...

O-Oh... I see...

Awkward.

Yes! Free mage! Accept, Reese!

Join my forces? You wish to fight on the front lines?

Yes. I am quite experienced in magic.

Your magic stat is awful and your wind skill is not much better. But you'll do. Accept her, Reese.

Although I do not know how much of an asset I will be to your soldiers... Still, I wish to fight. I must avenge my father's death!

I understand completely, but you must consider your position as the sole survivor of Riana's royal family.

REESE, YOU BUMBLING IMBECILE! ACCEPT HER!

Furthermore, I do not know if His Majesty will condone your wishes. As the leader of the Berwick League, King Volcens would have the final say in these matters.

Reese, I swear, if you dare bring this up to Volcens, I'll break your kneecaps.

I beseech you not to inform your king of my presence.

I have nothing but resentment for him.

 Yes! Exactly! What she said!

My Princess, you should not ask such things of Lord Reese, lest you get him into trouble... Lord Reese, we have traveled far and with great difficulty, and Her Highness is not in the greatest of moods. The Princess does not truly wish any ill will upon His Royal Highness.

Like hell she doesn't! Everyone hates Volcens!

Do not worry, Rosalie. There's no need to explain yourselves further about the matter.

Thank you-- wait, what do you mean, "pose"? She needs to fight for real!

Thank you, Lord Reese...

I applaud your devotion, Rosalie. Princess Aegina is fortunate to have such a dependable servant as you.

Oh, Lord Reese, you flatterer! You're embarrassing me!

Okay, I would advise that you refrain from flirting with the coldest man this side of Lazberia.

I'm just a clumsy maid...

What the hell are you talking about? You ran all the way to Navaron and then back in the middle of the night! You're awesome, if anything!

I mostly just carry Her Highness's luggage for her.

We will prepare a room for the two of you here at the West House. Tianna, if you please...

I will see that it is done, milord.

I take it, then, that you will accept me into your army?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! REESE, STOP HER!!

......

...TIANNA, STOP HER!

A mercenary?! Heavens above...

Lord Reese, please do not cast aside her wishes... You will accept her, won't you?

...Yes, albeit begrudgingly. You may fight alongside us.

Ah, thank you! Took you long enough.

Thank you for your hospitality, Lord Reese. And the same to you, Tianna.

Please do not press yourself too hard, Your Highness. When on the battlefield, please obey Lord Reese's instructions. Selfish disobedience by one soldier can lead to the deaths of many...

I will keep that in mind. I have the feeling that you and I will get along very well, Tianna.

I hope so, Your Highness. If you need anything from me, do not hesitate to ask. The same goes for you, Miss Rosalie.

Thank you, Lady Tianna.

What an excellent idea! Tianna, I leave Rosalie to you.

Be careful, I can be strict! Are you ready for that, Miss Rosalie?

Yes, ma'am! I will take on any trial set for me! To be able to learn from a beautiful woman like you is a dream come true for me!

Seriously, how high is this girl's libido? It's not really what her character is about, but hey, I gotta do my lame jokes so you remember I exist and this LP is mine.

Hee hee... (Such a funny girl, just like General Ward said she was...)

Wait, General Ward? You mean the guy who was a complete ass to her? Why would he say that...?

Very well! I accept you as my apprentice, Rosalie! Is that all right with you, Lord Reese?

Naturally. Things have not been easy for us ever since we came to Navaron. It's thanks to you, Tianna, that we've been able to rest our tired spirits.

Lord Reese...

Remember how in the last LP, Runan took a moment to acknowledge Eugen's badassery and I pointed out how awesome that was? Same principle here. Tianna deserves the world for all she does behind the scenes.

Okay, so the Pallas Riana has joined us! And Aegina is here, too! I like how the game hands you a free mage, a free thief, a free healer and a few free fighters. In other words, all the essentials. They make sure that you'll be able to make do even without any mercenaries.

As for the Pallas Riana, it has the same bad might as the rest of the wind orbs, but it has 4 whole strikes, which is enough to do a lot of damage to the right enemies. It recovers 8 uses every chapter, which ensures that her utility will last the whole game. Also, if the enemy dies before all four strikes happen, the orb doesn't lose 4 durability, which is great.

While on the topic of wind magic, there's this thing at the atelier which will be ideal to set up some captures.

Perhaps I'll change my mind, but for now I'll go ahead and deliver the two materials I have.

And then, ponies and thieves.

Ever the haggler, aren't you? Sorry, I just can't. Business can't keep up with supply these days, so prices are high. If I gave out discounts to everyone, I'd be out of business fast.

That's a shame... But I completely understand.

Wish I could help, but I can't. There aren't enough horses to go around these days as it is.

Hmm...

If I were to purchase new horses, we would have funds for little else... My liege would be disappointed...

I can totally imagine him turning to Carmal and giving him the puppy eyes after the speech. Smooth moves, Beardman.

Sir Ward! I've got an idea!

What is it, Carmal?

If you're worried about the cost, there's always one way to get new horses for free...

It... sorta worked. He's not giving us a discount, but he is revealing the secret to putting him out of business.

Catch them?

About half a day north of the city, there's a village with several herds of wild horses roaming nearby. They're tough to catch and even tougher to train, but they won't cost you a thing.

That may not be a bad idea... I will take it into consideration. Thank you, Carmal.

Too late to try and save your business, Carmal. Ward's seeing dollar denarius signs at this point.

Short preparations today.

So yeah, there's our next sidequest. Last time we saved a princess. Now we're going to pick up horses.

Aaaaaaand that's it. Sorry for the short update, but it can't be helped, I'm afraid. Next time, we go and get ourselves some horses. Wish me good luck, just as I wish you farewell!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To be continued

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban

* Unavailable

Capture count: 0

Reset count: 0

 

Current perfect streak: 1 map

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

[BrightBow]

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I did know this. It does baffle me. Why hide away half the script like that? And it's not all - didn't the Soren reveal require that you use Soren in PoR, get him an A support with Ike, then transfer the data to RD? Am I imagining things? 'Cause I could swear I read that somewhere.

Well, there isn't really a reveal. That whole "Soren is a branded" thing was already the subject of his PoR support. What that Radiant Dawn convo does is to go into more detail about the circumstances of him first meeting Ike.
But yeah, you need an A support between Soren and Ike in PoR AND also an A support between the two in Radiant Dawn for that convo.
 

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh right, I'd forgotten. This being Kaga, everyone is underaged.

Except for Sylvis. She's in her twenties.
 

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

As for the Pallas Riana, it has the same bad might as the rest of the wind orbs, but it has 4 whole strikes, which is enough to do a lot of damage to the right enemies. It recovers 8 uses every chapter, which ensures that her utility will last the whole game. Also, if the enemy dies before all four strikes happen, the orb doesn't lose 4 durability, which is great.

It's also one of only two orbs she could use that can attack at 2 range. The other being the Earthblaze. But you gotta craft that first, so it's both limited and takes a bit to get.
That's another unfortunate thing for her: She usually has to get close and personal.

Edited May 1, 2020 by BrightBow

[The Roger The Paladin]

On 4/30/2020 at 8:23 PM, BrightBow said:

Do people still think that's what Wario said and not "So ein Mist!"?

Well, to be fair, I never said it was a quote. It's the same as people constantly doing that "Luke I am your father" bit when referencing Star Wars, or "Beam me up Scotty", which was... you know, never actually said word for word in the entirety of the original run of Star Trek... but came from a goddamn bumper sticker of all places. I guess my point is, when a false quote is well known enough it becomes a reference in itself.

 

14 hours ago, Golb89 said:

(And yes: after years of lurking i finally registered an account here just for this...)

Is it sad this reminds me of Leona from King of Fighters if she were trying to wear her (adoptive) father's eyepatch?

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Who cares about that? I mean, remember Lot? He had no strength either, but it didn't matter because I could just throw him anywhere and he'd live!

Hence why I said right up your alley. Though the difference is, Lot didn't have as many people sharing that same defense growth. That said, I think you'd make her work. I mean, you made Wendy and Macellan work... and she's not as gimped as Wendy.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, at least you get to pick his fate. With the Slaver, he's spared no matter what because he's Kaga's self-insert.

Also, I love that he gets all the special supports of Radiant Dawn. It's so dumb, but the best kind of dumb, in my opinion. You can bet I'm gonna use him, if I make it that far in RD. No funny videos, sadly, because I don't think I can beat this.

Never going to make me like Oliver, because you know. Reasons stated relating to morality. But that was funny all the same.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahahahahahah... sorry.

Don't be. It's ten times funnier to me than it should be because Glare-rick is phonetically identical to the nickname I had for the one I know... because he glares all the time. So it's like my old joke just came full circle... and became a creepypasta entity at the same time.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why... why is a plastic cup...? What...?

Don't try to understand it. The more one tries to understand Aqua Teen Hunger Force, the less sense it makes. The show was essentially an ongoing non-sequitor where characters would die one episode and be back with no explanation the next, the main characters were essentially a sentient happy meal living in New Jersey, and weird stuff happened. A lot.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's Faramir, not Sherpa. Fearamir, to be precise.

Well that's better. Also totally should have noticed the lack of sword glow and missing eye.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

How exactly do you pronounce "Derrick"? Dewrreck?

Only when I'm badly punning it. Because punning it normally? I wouldn't dare... ick.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Uh... no, I... I do not see it. You want an actual clone of Serra? Go and take a look at Three Houses's most popular waifu. It's literally a recycled design, a recycled name, even her personality is half recycled. You know, she's Linhardt only without the smart and more manipulative? How Hilda became the next Camilla is completely beyond me.

I don't know. I find Hilda mildly more entertaining than Serra. If only because of that clean bandage item and the implication she literally fakes being injured to skip training. It's so audacious.  Not much else to the character though.

I did of course make the point our princess here isn't a caricature like Serra. So the implication is that she's more of a human being and less someone you'd want to murder if you dealt with them on a daily basis.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Is it the Kefka scene?

If it's what I'm thinking yes. Though if you met Shadow in the tavern, then you should have seen it.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What the hell are you apologizing for?

Either traumatizing you with the memory, or the unconscious realization that I'd managed to type "fold" instead of "folk" ruining one rhyme. How the hell did I do that when they aren't even close on the keyboard?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What, are you gonna start calling Makalov a Serra ripoff, too?

Well... If he were real, I wouldn't be able to stand him. If Serra were real I wouldn't be able to stand her... And no one's ever seen them in the same room.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...you know, at this point I've just realized, which one of my many iterations is the one that writes everything? Everyone else introduces themselves before speaking, except for me. Who am I...!?

The one sane enough not to pretend to be a separate entity?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It was originally just a parody of bad creepypastas. Then it grew.

Which is why I love it. Because I both like reading and writing bad creepypastas. I have a killer about a haunted/hacked Super Metroid Cartridge... somewhere.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wow, you actually know! Wait, but why the field of politics...?

Spoiler

Pretty sure it's not the man who is adulterous in that situation.

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That is absolutely hilarious. I don't understand, though. Why slowly bend his hand rather than just snap it like a twig? He seems like he'd be capable of doing that.

Quite simply... Spider-man's upper limit for an overhead press is established at 10 tonnes. Kingpin, though inhumanly strong by the standards of a mere mortal... is not that strong. Largely, in fights with Spider-man he's used tricks like gas, his cane's beam, and the fact he moves deceptively fast (something that lost a lot of mileage over the years) to take an advantage. Small wonder he gradually became more of a foe for normal human strength characters like Daredevil and the Punisher... in spite of his beginnings.

In short, Kingpin's simply not got the strength to do it. At least to Spider-man. Give him Daredevil, the Punisher, or Captain America, and he's got the advantage (and he has fought all of them so that's no random selection).

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I have nothing but resentment for him.

 Yes! Exactly! What she said!

Definitely far more level headed and tolerable than the other pink-haired magic user.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait, General Ward? You mean the guy who was a complete ass to her? Why would he say that...?

Perhaps, he's a tsundere. Insulting to people he likes.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Aaaaaaand that's it. Sorry for the short update, but it can't be helped, I'm afraid. Next time, we go and get ourselves some horses. Wish me good luck, just as I wish you farewell!

Well, just so long as no one's riding them.

I hate it when I have more to say on the replies than the update. But what can I do?

[eclipse]

Flirting with Rosalie in front of Aegina?  Reese is a bolder man that he appears!

[Hawkwing]

On 4/29/2020 at 11:34 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Which is pretty stupid in a world full of super-heroes (not that I ever remember him doing that in the comic... I do remember him crushing a guy by dropping an extremely large rock on him after he reported bad news though).

I read it on TV Tropes, which I take with a grain of salt anyway. That was an example of his strength that came to mind, and I wasn't really in "I'll check this fact" mode since I got distracted doing just that earlier.

On 4/29/2020 at 11:34 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

D'oh I missed would be a good old Mario Party reference. So probably that.

I didn't even know it was a Mario Party reference. I just know it's what some people say when they screw up.

19 hours ago, Golb89 said:

Sorry, not sorry:

That is an... interesting... description, to say the least.

Won't lie, though; It did get me curious in looking up the M16A1 and M4A1, and I don't regret it. Despite not having a big interest in guns, I love learning about them.

19 hours ago, Golb89 said:

(And yes: after years of lurking i finally registered an account here just for this...)

Welcome! Hope you enjoy your time here!

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Part 17 - Extremely short update.

YAY! I won't spend all day writing this!

Don't get me wrong, I love longer updates, too. It's just nice to have something that won't take long to complete every now and again.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, FE final bosses range from "piss easy" to "eh". So it's okay to be merely "eh". It's as good as it gets.

I'm curious what it would take to make a good final boss in Fire Emblem. I think Duma had the right idea, having both magical and physical attacks and his map featuring every mechanic the player has encountered throughout the game, though it could be expanded upon.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Also, I love that he gets all the special supports of Radiant Dawn. It's so dumb, but the best kind of dumb, in my opinion. You can bet I'm gonna use him, if I make it that far in RD. No funny videos, sadly, because I don't think I can beat this.

I won't lie that Adept looks kind of broken. It might not be as much in practice, but I am not surprised that it hasn't returned.

Also, as cool as the critical hit attacks of the Tellius games are, they seem like they tend to be on the slow side.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Uh... no, I... I do not see it. You want an actual clone of Serra? Go and take a look at Three Houses's most popular waifu. It's literally a recycled design, a recycled name, even her personality is half recycled. You know, she's Linhardt only without the smart and more manipulative? How Hilda became the next Camilla is completely beyond me.

I think part of it is the irony of a character that tries to avoid work is also a really good front-line unit. I didn't recruit her, so I can't really comment on her character or unit performance.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The Lennox dance.

How did you make this, out of question?

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

As for me, I do not fall for those lowly tricks. Map design is my only waifu! Map design!

So you love cartography, then?

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why are you questioning the funny meme?

Because it got me thinking if you could, medically, be in a coma for a day.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You can get a book, and if you enjoy it you can get the rest. The episodes are mostly self-contained, with a few references to past adventures scattered around, and a couple of stories that consist of two books. So you could really start anywhere, except for the second part of the aforementioned two-book stories.

I see. I'll keep that in mind.

I forgot to mention last time that I have seen The Adventures of Tintin movie, and it was pretty dang good.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm of a similar opinion. I don't know, but turn-based RPG combat is just... not my kind of thing. The few RPGs I do like are the ones that shake things up in the combat. And the story is not enough of an incentive - I could just watch a playthrough for the story.

Somewhat same, in the sense that an RPG has to do something interesting with the combat for me to enjoy it.  With the exception of the Elder Scrolls, I tend to prefer turn-based, though. With real-time, I end up pausing a lot to choose the attacks/spells I want, or doing them later than I would have liked if the game doesn't allow pausing.

KOTOR 2 and Planescape: Torment were the only RPG's I played almost solely for the story, and there player choice actually did matter, so watching a playthrough wouldn't have been the same. It helped that both games had extremely good gameplay-story integration. Although the interesting conversations were both a blessing and a curse. They were definitely engaging and got me to think, even outside of the game, but holy crap having several insightful conversations in a row is one way to exhaust me quickly.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And inside the LP updates?

Let's save time and assume every update.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

No, please. 'twas a joke. It'll be deleted.

Not if it is in FftF, where necroposting and weirdness is allowed. It just can't break any of the forum rules, which I doubt saying Eugen over 444 times would do.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahaha, and then everyone has it in 3H, making bows the plain best weapon type.

Not close-counter, counter.

Either you have to fight fire with fire and attack archers in a game where they're at their best, or deal damage at close range and hope your unit's damage output isn't greater than their HP.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I see... I'm afraid I didn't make it that far.

I recommend giving it another shot sometime. I beat it again a week or two ago, and exploiting bow archers long range and sending faster units around the back helps.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Guts was on a boat for 10 years, to be precise. 10 years in real time, the creator just took "a break". I pity anyone who expects to see the end of the story in their lifetime.

Now the memes about wanting Guts off a boat make more sense.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

"Hey, calm down! I meant no harm... it's just hard to see in this helmet!"

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

"What have I gotten myself into..."

Well, I was way off. A lot of the words I kept thinking up ended up having five letters.

Also, having ellipses as ellipses... genius. And cruel.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon, man. As soon as you figured out the "d'oh", that should've been a really easy guess.

This is the first time I've see the meme. As I mentioned earlier, I just know that "d'oh" has been used before, including your Let's Plays.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I guess that is, one explanation. The other one is that Czene is secretly swole.

By "swole" I take it you means she's secretly muscular?

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's not really uncommon in this game. Whoever starts a melee fight in this game, friend or foe, dashes toward their target. I just haven't taken many screenshots of enemies running.

I meant to see it was uncommon in the screenshots, but it seems I forgot to put that down.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

They're really different, though. I can't remember Saber ever being sassy.

He has his moments of sarcasm. His voice just popped to mind whenever I read Sherpas lines, which is why I brought it up.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It does! In... exactly the same way it always does: dark sorcerer in green robes. I am original!

Admittedly, while I always find these sequences to be intriguing, I don't always have something interesting to comment upon. I still like to acknowledge that I didn't skim that part of the LP.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wow, you actually know! Wait, but why the field of politics...?

Google is a wonderful tool. Especially when it decided not to show images.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes. I am quite experienced in magic.

Your magic stat is awful and your wind skill is not much better. But you'll do. Accept her, Reese.

Maybe she means "experienced" in the sense that she won't blow herself up?

We... don't really get any background about how dangerous or difficult learning magic is in this series, do we? Except for how dabbling in dark magic too much can be hazardous to your health.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I understand completely, but you must consider your position as the sole survivor of Riana's royal family.

REESE, YOU BUMBLING IMBECILE! ACCEPT HER!

Storywise, that's a reasonable concern.

Gameplaywise, I'm screaming along with you.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, now her portrait name makes sense.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, ma'am! I will take on any trial set for me! To be able to learn from a beautiful woman like you is a dream come true for me!

Seriously, how high is this girl's libido? It's not really what her character is about, but hey, I gotta do my lame jokes so you remember I exist and this LP is mine.

Not knowing what libido meant, I decided to look it up.

I regretted it immediately.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hee hee... (Such a funny girl, just like General Ward said she was...)

Wait, General Ward? You mean the guy who was a complete ass to her? Why would he say that...?

Maybe General Ward meant funny as in "strange" and Tianna either agrees with him or thought that he meant "humorous".

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, so the Pallas Riana has joined us! And Aegina is here, too! I like how the game hands you a free mage, a free thief, a free healer and a few free fighters. In other words, all the essentials. They make sure that you'll be able to make do even without any mercenaries.

As for the Pallas Riana, it has the same bad might as the rest of the wind orbs, but it has 4 whole strikes, which is enough to do a lot of damage to the right enemies. It recovers 8 uses every chapter, which ensures that her utility will last the whole game. Also, if the enemy dies before all four strikes happen, the orb doesn't lose 4 durability, which is great.

Nice weapon. I see that Kaga did regenerating magic first.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

While on the topic of wind magic, there's this thing at the atelier which will be ideal to set up some captures.

How does snow increase injury rate? Does it give people frostbite? Or does it make them slower and thus easier to capture?

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Kaga does Breath of the Wild first!

Although if this game doen't allow you to tame and ride dear and bears, I will be disapointed.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Random, but I just noticed that you gave Arran a moustache, and I approve.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Still have to get used to how this game takes place centuries after the last one.

[Benice]

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

No man. He's LPing FE7. I cannot come close to that game. I am allergic, you see.

I am allergic to FE7 too. That's why my LP's that bad. (Or at least that's my excuse.)

I do wish I'd picked a game I actually liked for my LP...But it's still better than Genealogy.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Unluckily for you, I was on my phone, so when I held down the link it showed me the youtube link.

...then I did it anyway because I like the song.

Victory...?

And Awww, you were gonna donate! That's so sweet!

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jordan? He's called Jorgen in the spanish version.

...also in the english version, but I can understand the blunder.

I think that's the third time I've messed up somebody's name not on purpose this LP already. Urgh...My childhood, I have failed you!

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Anyway, Jorgen's interesting because he's, I'm pretty sure, the only villain in the series that is killed and you can clearly see his corpse. And then he got thrown into space.

Man, the Moon duology was the heaviest Tintin story, wasn't it? You know, the twins's hairy drama notwithstanding. But I'll admit, I like the twins also. Heck, I'm not sure if there's a Tintin character I don't like. Even the villains, I love to hate.

I do believe that he has that distinction.

The moon duology was one of the only ones where people actually died; I'm pretty sure that in all of the others, nobody does.

Herge was a master of both one-offs and recurring characters.

Dumb's the word, that's my motto. The twins are amazing. I thought I would die laughing when Tintin watched them fly an airplane in The Black Island. (Read that one too, Hawkwing!)

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

If you want to do it chronologically, though, don't start with Tintin in the Congo. The book is... weird. Really weird. Disturbing even, at times. Completely unlike the rest of the series, it's very much a product of its time (the 30s), and that is not a compliment. Even Herge himself ended up hating it in later years. Even if you manage to find it (it seems it's rarer than the rest, though I do possess a copy), I wouldn't recommend it, to be honest.

Tintin in America, the next book, is still a bit wonky, but it's where Herge started to improve. The Cigars of the Pharaoh is what I'd call his first truly great Tintin book. So my recommendation would be to start with Cigars and perhaps leave America for a bit later.

I agree with this; Tintin in the land of the soviets is worse, though. If you haven't read it, I mean, it's good for laughs until you realize how racist it is. But my innocent 9-year-old self couldn't tell at that point too much. Oh my god, it was bad.

I've never owned either Tintin in the Congo/America, but I do recall it being rather racist. It's been a long time since I read it last.

Starting with The Crab with Golden Claws might also be a good idea; it introduces Haddock, an awesome character. The twins, Thompson and Thomson are introduced in Cigars of the pharaoh, which is in my opinion their weakest appearance, but certainly not Land of the Soviets bad. They're a bit better in the Blue lotus, and I think they really become great in the Black island.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh yeah, mgic in RD is actually quite pretty. Thani is the bomb.

BTW when you make it to part four, watch out for Wind/Thunder mages. They look almost identical, and I lost Zeiss Jill and Miledy Haar both because of it.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahah... ah, the Penguins of Madagascar. Their show was one of the things that I watched as a child when Code Lyoko wasn't on. It was really weird.

Has anyone else here seen the Return of the Revenge of Doctor blowhole? It's been years and years since I last saw it, but oh my god, it's my second favorite comedy movie/long episode.

...My favorite being the Cat in the hat movie. Yes, the live action one.

No regrets. It's the height of comedy.

...I feel as if I've desecrated the thread. I shall go purify myself by eating mangoes.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Didn't find anything on the name, except for a reddit post saying that Three Houses has a lot of features from Tear Ring and Berwick Saga.

I see. Aethin, context, please.

Rubenio.exe has stopped working. Please destroy all copies of three houses, then try again.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Also also, how do you want me to know if a character would be fun at a party? I've attended like four parties in my life, and each time I got bored because everyone got drunk off their asses and I don't drink! I'm no fun at parties! You should know that well, considering you've done the complete opposite of stanning me since the start!

I've attended two, but since we're all less than nineteen, someone brought blue Gatorade in a Windex bottle. The time after that, the same person brought apple juice in a wine bottle.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah, well, I try to be humble. Mistakes in FE are almost always on the player, and could be avoided 99% of the time. I just find it hilarious that my luck fails to save me most of the time. Others coast through FEs purely thanks to luck. I can't.

At  least your cripple counter isn't at nineteen yet.

• Adel X2
• Izerna X 1
• Leon X 1
• Aegina X 4
• Czene X 7
• Dean X 1
• Christine X 2
• Faye X 1

But I am obviously way worse than you, so they're probably mostly on me. Aegina's third wasn't, though! It left her at eight HP! EIGHT!  AND SHE STILL GOT CRIPPLED!

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's not really uncommon in this game. Whoever starts a melee fight in this game, friend or foe, dashes toward their target. I just haven't taken many screenshots of enemies running.

The spear charging map animations is pathetic. They probably should have tried to make it at least ressemble the full animation. Then again, teleportation is a thing that the Raze empire seems to use a lot, so I guess Spear knights can too.

[Golb89]

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I like how the game hands you a free mage, a free thief, a free healer and a few free fighters. In other words, all the essentials. They make sure that you'll be able to make do even without any mercenaries.

So Kaga did "Arknights" first too (but without the kemonomimis, so it doesn't count)

In which case, i think i might know something about Derrick's tragic past:

Spoiler

 

And his even more tragic future too:

Spoiler

Maybe.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Catch them?

(Until a month ago i would have probably edited Ward's face on it myself before posting it, but eh...)

Edited May 2, 2020 by Golb89

[Saint Rubenio]

Part 18 - The best brigand.

:

Spoiler

On 5/1/2020 at 3:13 PM, BrightBow said:

Well, there isn't really a reveal. That whole "Soren is a branded" thing was already the subject of his PoR support. What that Radiant Dawn convo does is to go into more detail about the circumstances of him first meeting Ike.

Still, kind of a major character thing to hide underneath...

But yeah, you need an A support between Soren and Ike in PoR AND also an A support between the two in Radiant Dawn for that convo.

...the most ridiculous requirements since the Leteena event! What the hell!? Did they notice the Leteena nonsense in Kaga's Notes and decided they wanted to do it too?

Except for Sylvis. She's in her twenties.

You do not need to tell me that, pal. I knew.

It's also one of only two orbs she could use that can attack at 2 range. The other being the Earthblaze. But you gotta craft that first, so it's both limited and takes a bit to get.
That's another unfortunate thing for her: She usually has to get close and personal.

Yeah, I can see how the other two'd have the advantage in this aspect.

 

On 5/1/2020 at 4:48 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Well, to be fair, I never said it was a quote. It's the same as people constantly doing that "Luke I am your father" bit when referencing Star Wars, or "Beam me up Scotty", which was... you know, never actually said word for word in the entirety of the original run of Star Trek... but came from a goddamn bumper sticker of all places. I guess my point is, when a false quote is well known enough it becomes a reference in itself.

Yes, it's quite the common phenomenon.

Is it sad this reminds me of Leona from King of Fighters if she were trying to wear her (adoptive) father's eyepatch?

Why does she have a different hair color in every game?

Hence why I said right up your alley. Though the difference is, Lot didn't have as many people sharing that same defense growth. That said, I think you'd make her work. I mean, you made Wendy and Macellan work... and she's not as gimped as Wendy.

I've made a lot of things work. It's what I like to do when I'm not doing an ironman. It's also what I like to do when I'm ironmanning. By all means my life'd be easier if I didn't always refuse to use all the good units unless I personally like them.

Never going to make me like Oliver, because you know. Reasons stated relating to morality. But that was funny all the same.

Yeah, I get what you're saying. Personally, I find him to be too dumb a character to hate him. He's written as a joke in RD, and as such, I cannot take him seriously.

The fact that he looks like a deflated Obelix does not help. He's like a rapey version of one of my childhood characters. How hilarious is that?

Don't be. It's ten times funnier to me than it should be because Glare-rick is phonetically identical to the nickname I had for the one I know... because he glares all the time. So it's like my old joke just came full circle... and became a creepypasta entity at the same time.

Maybe I should add him to the spoopy meme.

Don't try to understand it. The more one tries to understand Aqua Teen Hunger Force, the less sense it makes. The show was essentially an ongoing non-sequitor where characters would die one episode and be back with no explanation the next, the main characters were essentially a sentient happy meal living in New Jersey, and weird stuff happened. A lot.

Reminds me of the time youtube recommended me Xavier Renegade Angel and I was thoroughly confused.

Well that's better. Also totally should have noticed the lack of sword glow and missing eye.

The sword glow doesn't belong to Sherpa, actually. All swing trails glow red when the hit is fatal in this game. It's just that Sherpa's hitting trail is inmense. You probably know this already, but I will explain nonetheless.

Only when I'm badly punning it. Because punning it normally? I wouldn't dare... ick.

Yeah, that makes s--

...oh you cheeky-- You actually did it, you absolute madman! Not gonna lie, this brought the biggest grin to my face.

I don't know. I find Hilda mildly more entertaining than Serra. If only because of that clean bandage item and the implication she literally fakes being injured to skip training. It's so audacious.  Not much else to the character though.

I just find the amount of fans she has to be kind of annoying. But, of course, being a fan of the likes of Matthis, Arran and Frost (read, characters who are either forgotten or hated by the community), this is all in a day's work for me.

I did of course make the point our princess here isn't a caricature like Serra. So the implication is that she's more of a human being and less someone you'd want to murder if you dealt with them on a daily basis.

I never hated Serra that much, actually. Probably because she was so absurdly obnoxious that it became surreal. Clarine, on the other hand, is a little more subdued, which brings her closer to someone I could meet in real life. And that makes me despise her guts.

If it's what I'm thinking yes. Though if you met Shadow in the tavern, then you should have seen it.

I don't know. I have the faint memories of meeting the Shadow fellow and Edgar, but nothing in-between.

Either traumatizing you with the memory, or the unconscious realization that I'd managed to type "fold" instead of "folk" ruining one rhyme. How the hell did I do that when they aren't even close on the keyboard?

Yeah, how'd you even manage that? Still, don't worry. You cannot match Aethin's The Roger The Paladin. If you're reading this, man, please accept my humblest apologies, but I've seen few typos as epic as this one.

Well... If he were real, I wouldn't be able to stand him. If Serra were real I wouldn't be able to stand her... And no one's ever seen them in the same room.

Hahahahahahahahahahah... okay, you win this round.

The one sane enough not to pretend to be a separate entity?

That implies there is sanity in me. Perhaps I should try to look for it, amongst the horseman PTSD and the RNG PTSD.

Which is why I love it. Because I both like reading and writing bad creepypastas. I have a killer about a haunted/hacked Super Metroid Cartridge... somewhere.

I remember laughing my ass off with a friend of mine reading a lame-ass creepypasta that, to boot, was horrendously translated to spanish. It was a great experience.

I also wrote a thing when I was like, 15, and posted it in the nosleep subreddit. It got no replies and it was swifly swept under the rug of history. And I'm glad, because God was that friggin' embarrasing.

  Reveal hidden contents

Pretty sure it's not the man who is adulterous in that situation.

Uhhh... okay, you guys have managed to confuse me. And I'm usually the dirty-minded one here.

Quite simply... Spider-man's upper limit for an overhead press is established at 10 tonnes. Kingpin, though inhumanly strong by the standards of a mere mortal... is not that strong. Largely, in fights with Spider-man he's used tricks like gas, his cane's beam, and the fact he moves deceptively fast (something that lost a lot of mileage over the years) to take an advantage. Small wonder he gradually became more of a foe for normal human strength characters like Daredevil and the Punisher... in spite of his beginnings.

In short, Kingpin's simply not got the strength to do it. At least to Spider-man. Give him Daredevil, the Punisher, or Captain America, and he's got the advantage (and he has fought all of them so that's no random selection).

I just wanted swole Wrys to win, all right?

Definitely far more level headed and tolerable than the other pink-haired magic user.

Just like Kaga's pink-haired axe woman with a stolen name is ten times better than IntSys's.

Although, there was a particular scene with her in Vestaria that... really disturbed me. It didn't go anywhere, though. Guessing they will elaborate in the sequels. The sequels I'll never see, because they most likely won't be translated. Or maybe they will be. I'm not sure what Dangen Entertainment considers to be "good sales". But I can only hope Vestaria I reached them.

Perhaps, he's a tsundere. Insulting to people he likes.

Oh God, tsundere Ward. That is not a suggestion I was expecting to see.

Well, just so long as no one's riding them.

Come to think about it, I don't think we've ever met enemy riders yet. But we will, oh yes we will...

I hate it when I have more to say on the replies than the update. But what can I do?

To be fair, that was me too. I had more to say on the replies and the sidestory portion!

 

On 5/1/2020 at 7:57 PM, eclipse said:

Flirting with Rosalie in front of Aegina?  Reese is a bolder man that he appears!

Eclipse, my friend, I do not believe Reese knows what the concept of flirting means. Unless food is involved, you will get no emotions out of his stone-cold heart.

 

On 5/1/2020 at 8:50 PM, Hawkwing said:

I read it on TV Tropes, which I take with a grain of salt anyway. That was an example of his strength that came to mind, and I wasn't really in "I'll check this fact" mode since I got distracted doing just that earlier.

I'm butting into the conversation!

I didn't even know it was a Mario Party reference. I just know it's what some people say when they screw up.

I've used it so many times and you never got it until now...

That is an... interesting... description, to say the least.

"Her love for alcohol is also unparalleled"

Now I should make my fanfic character an alcoholic, too.

Won't lie, though; It did get me curious in looking up the M16A1 and M4A1, and I don't regret it. Despite not having a big interest in guns, I love learning about them.

Guns are a fun subject, when they're not being used to kill people of course.

Welcome! Hope you enjoy your time here!

So do I!

YAY! I won't spend all day writing this!

Don't get me wrong, I love longer updates, too. It's just nice to have something that won't take long to complete every now and again.

These early "between sidequests" updates are often going to be short. There's just not much more than a couple scenes to take us to the next battle, and the character stuff usually happens either at the end of a chapter, at the beginning or right after the main mission.

I'm curious what it would take to make a good final boss in Fire Emblem. I think Duma had the right idea, having both magical and physical attacks and his map featuring every mechanic the player has encountered throughout the game, though it could be expanded upon.

I'm not sure, to be honest. The reason final bosses in FE are so lame for the most part is that single units in FE are lame in general. Beating one guy is easy, unless you inflate his stats to the stratosphere.

I won't lie that Adept looks kind of broken. It might not be as much in practice, but I am not surprised that it hasn't returned.

It's not as broken as it looks. It makes stuff like this or my Hicks video possible, but since it's chance-based, you can never plan around it or count on it at all. I had to do a lot of RNG abusing to get the Hicks thing to happen, and I still can't believe it took me as little time as it did.

Also, as cool as the critical hit attacks of the Tellius games are, they seem like they tend to be on the slow side.

Well, kinda. I don't know, I find the Tellius animations to be... adequate. They do their work, they don't make me want to gouge my eyes out like Three Houses, but they're worse than 2D.

I think part of it is the irony of a character that tries to avoid work is also a really good front-line unit. I didn't recruit her, so I can't really comment on her character or unit performance.

I've seen that, yes. I suppose it's funny. I guess.

How did you make this, out of question?

I took his sprites from my screenshots, and spent a bit of time editing them. Then I used good ol' reliable, gifmaker.me

So you love cartography, then?

Uh... yes?

Because it got me thinking if you could, medically, be in a coma for a day.

Well, medically, I have no idea!

I see. I'll keep that in mind.

Steer clear of Land of Soviets, too. I didn't mention it because, unlike Congo, I never owned or read that one, but Benice explained it quite clearly.

Early Tintin suffers from being from the time that it's from; a time of misconceptions. Cigars is where the series really started to shine, like I said. So yeah, start there, or like Benice said, at Crab with Golden Claws, since that's Haddock's glorious first appearance.

I forgot to mention last time that I have seen The Adventures of Tintin movie, and it was pretty dang good.

I've not seen it. It appears it had a mixed reception among Tintin fans, but that was to be expected.

...Hey, come to think about it, as well as the books, there's a pretty awesome cartoon adaptation from the 90s! They adapted the whole series except for Congo, Soviets and the incomplete story Herge was working on when he died (in other words, they adapted all that matters). If you compare these episodes to the books, the work they did is honestly exceptional - they're unbelievably faithful to the source material. You'd think Herge was behind the cartoon as well, except, well, he'd been dead for ten years. The books are still superior in my opinion, of course, but the cartoon did a good job of it.

Somewhat same, in the sense that an RPG has to do something interesting with the combat for me to enjoy it.  With the exception of the Elder Scrolls, I tend to prefer turn-based, though. With real-time, I end up pausing a lot to choose the attacks/spells I want, or doing them later than I would have liked if the game doesn't allow pausing.

I understand. Well, I guess RPG combat just isn't for me personally.

KOTOR 2 and Planescape: Torment were the only RPG's I played almost solely for the story, and there player choice actually did matter, so watching a playthrough wouldn't have been the same. It helped that both games had extremely good gameplay-story integration. Although the interesting conversations were both a blessing and a curse. They were definitely engaging and got me to think, even outside of the game, but holy crap having several insightful conversations in a row is one way to exhaust me quickly.

I see your point. Yeah, there are stories that actually take advantage of the fact that they're in a game, and make things more interactive. More linear stories are not a good selling point in a videogame for me, as I can just watch a playthrough.

Let's save time and assume every update.

Multiple times, every update. I mean, heck - it's a fair guess to say I've mentioned him in at least half of the Berwick updates so far, and he's not even in this game!

Not if it is in FftF, where necroposting and weirdness is allowed. It just can't break any of the forum rules, which I doubt saying Eugen over 444 times would do.

Hmmm... still, it'll confuse everyone who isn't a reader of these LPs.

Not close-counter, counter.

Ah... what is the difference?

Either you have to fight fire with fire and attack archers in a game where they're at their best, or deal damage at close range and hope your unit's damage output isn't greater than their HP.

...now I'm even more confused. Why would you wish that they weren't one-shot?

...oooooooohhhhhhhhh it reflects damage! I'm so used to FE's idea of counterattacks that I didn't even consider that.

I recommend giving it another shot sometime. I beat it again a week or two ago, and exploiting bow archers long range and sending faster units around the back helps.

Well, perhaps one day. Right now, though, I want to see if I can beat a "new" (new for me, anyway) FE. So far, I've dropped Three Houses (finished later, dropped again in the second run), PoR, Echoes and FE3. I can only hope RD breaks the curse, because this is starting to get ridiculous. Heck, there's a couple of fangames I've been keeping an eye on that will be released soon - if I beat them, I'll have beaten more fanhacks than official games! Not even joking! Some FE fan I am!

Now the memes about wanting Guts off a boat make more sense.

Don't they? I didn't make it that far when I read the thing, myself. I made the mistake of reading it in spanish, so I could talk more freely about it with my friend. The result was that the terrible translation made me quit when they translated "I'm flabbergasted" as a guy saying his name. Not even joking, the incompetent buffoons thought the guy randomly introduced himself mid-sentence as Flabbergasted. It wasn't the only issue I'd been having with the manga (in my opinion its quality kinda plummets after the Golden Age arc), but it was the last straw.

Well, I was way off. A lot of the words I kept thinking up ended up having five letters.

Hahah, oh well. Better luck next time.

Also, having ellipses as ellipses... genius. And cruel.

Ahahahahahahahah... I'm so sorry.

This is the first time I've see the meme. As I mentioned earlier, I just know that "d'oh" has been used before, including your Let's Plays.

Well, d'oh is pretty popular, to be fair.

By "swole" I take it you means she's secretly muscular?

No, I meant to say she's whole... some, but I misspelled the first part and then fell asleep before I could finish typing the word.

Of course I meant that. What else could I mean?

I meant to see it was uncommon in the screenshots, but it seems I forgot to put that down.

You did, mate. You very much did.

He has his moments of sarcasm. His voice just popped to mind whenever I read Sherpas lines, which is why I brought it up.

Well, I can sort of understand. The voice kinda fits him. Maybe.

Admittedly, while I always find these sequences to be intriguing, I don't always have something interesting to comment upon. I still like to acknowledge that I didn't skim that part of the LP.

Thanks for the thought.

Google is a wonderful tool. Especially when it decided not to show images.

I guess so...

Maybe she means "experienced" in the sense that she won't blow herself up?

We... don't really get any background about how dangerous or difficult learning magic is in this series, do we? Except for how dabbling in dark magic too much can be hazardous to your health.

Well, in BWS it's been established to be so dangerous that orbs cannot be sold to those who don't practice magic. But then they do it anyway, so what do I know. Maybe Yumil is just a crooked saleswoman. Doesn't give a damn if someone ends up hurt, so long as she gets her moneys. Oh dear, it's another Valery...

Storywise, that's a reasonable concern.

Gameplaywise, I'm screaming along with you.

FE in a nutshell.

Well, now her portrait name makes sense.

Of course. They all make sense, if you think on 'em hard enough.

Not knowing what libido meant, I decided to look it up.

I regretted it immediately.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah... ah, the things you've learned with my LPs. None of 'em good.

Maybe General Ward meant funny as in "strange" and Tianna either agrees with him or thought that he meant "humorous".

Maybe he said "she's funny in the head" and Tianna misheard him. I could see him saying that.

Nice weapon. I see that Kaga did regenerating magic first.

Always, KDiF.

How does snow increase injury rate? Does it give people frostbite? Or does it make them slower and thus easier to capture?

Good guesses both.

Kaga does Breath of the Wild first!

Although if this game doen't allow you to tame and ride dear and bears, I will be disapointed.

Be disappointed. I am sorry, but no.

Random, but I just noticed that you gave Arran a moustache, and I approve.

Hah! I'm glad someone noticed. I wanted to give him some sort of difference without deviating too much from his original look. For reasons.

Still have to get used to how this game takes place centuries after the last one.

Kinda weird that half the fanfic gang is alive, no?

Fun fact: due to the fact that BWS takes place hundreds of years after TRS, the very existence of this thread means that, technically, I've killed myself off for, like, the fourth time. Old age this time, I can only hope.

 

On 5/1/2020 at 9:48 PM, Benice said:

I am allergic to FE7 too. That's why my LP's that bad. (Or at least that's my excuse.)

I do wish I'd picked a game I actually liked for my LP...But it's still better than Genealogy.

Hah... well, I've only picked games I like. Even FE6. As dumb and flawed as FE6 is at times, I have a soft spot for it. FE4 probably needs a remake more, but I'll admit, it'd make me happier to see FE6 on the switch. So I can marry Echidna.

Victory...?

Take it. It's better than outright losing.

And Awww, you were gonna donate! That's so sweet!

To be brutally honest, I never believed it was true. You need to work on your trickery.

I think that's the third time I've messed up somebody's name not on purpose this LP already. Urgh...My childhood, I have failed you!

Ah, well. Don't worry. At least you're not the guy who fails to get all the references. Like Roundabout five fuckin' times.

I do believe that he has that distinction.

Not one that I'd like to have, myself.

The moon duology was one of the only ones where people actually died; I'm pretty sure that in all of the others, nobody does.

A few villains die in other stories. Remember the Broken Ear's brothers? The ones who drowned and were depicted being taken to Hell by demons? Yeah... I'm not sure if there's any other Tintin story where a good guy dies, though. Though in Wolff's case, it was necessary. His fate was precisely what cemented him as a "good guy".

Herge was a master of both one-offs and recurring characters.

Yeah, everyone was so lovable in his stories. Even the villains, at times. Rastapopoulos was absolutely hilarious.

Dumb's the word, that's my motto. The twins are amazing. I thought I would die laughing when Tintin watched them fly an airplane in The Black Island. (Read that one too, Hawkwing!)

Oh yeah, the airplane subplot in Black Island. I'm laughing just remembering that. Didn't they spend, like, a quarter of the book on that airplane?

Cuthbert's also absolutely hilarious. Every time he and Haddock interact I just can't concentrate.

I agree with this; Tintin in the land of the soviets is worse, though. If you haven't read it, I mean, it's good for laughs until you realize how racist it is. But my innocent 9-year-old self couldn't tell at that point too much. Oh my god, it was bad.

I never had that one, unlike Congo. Still, even as a child, something about Congo felt really off. Enough that I rarely ever picked it up.

I've never owned either Tintin in the Congo/America, but I do recall it being rather racist. It's been a long time since I read it last.

America's better, from what I recall. Still, I mantain that Cigars is where it started to be really good.

Starting with The Crab with Golden Claws might also be a good idea; it introduces Haddock, an awesome character. The twins, Thompson and Thomson are introduced in Cigars of the pharaoh, which is in my opinion their weakest appearance, but certainly not Land of the Soviets bad. They're a bit better in the Blue lotus, and I think they really become great in the Black island.

Honestly, starting with Haddock might not be a good idea, because then he'll miss him in every story where he doesn't appear.

I mean, hell, even Herge himself loved Haddock so much, that when he remade Land of Black Gold 20 years after its original release, he found a way to shoehorn Haddock into the story and even made his out-of-nowhere appearance into a running gag in the book.

BTW when you make it to part four, watch out for Wind/Thunder mages. They look almost identical, and I lost Zeiss Jill and Miledy Haar both because of it.

I'll be careful.

Has anyone else here seen the Return of the Revenge of Doctor blowhole? It's been years and years since I last saw it, but oh my god, it's my second favorite comedy movie/long episode.

Nope. Afraid not.

...My favorite being the Cat in the hat movie. Yes, the live action one.

No regrets. It's the height of comedy.

...I've seen the hat, though. In TF2. Huh...

...I feel as if I've desecrated the thread. I shall go purify myself by eating mangoes.

My threads are desecrated the moment they begin existing. I mean, their very nature is desecration of all these games that we love, by virtue of being played by a completely horrible player.

Rubenio.exe has stopped working. Please destroy all copies of three houses, then try again.

Knowing my luck, I can just imagine that, upon playing my own copy one last time, I'd find that it's, after all, not that bad.

I've attended two, but since we're all less than nineteen, someone brought blue Gatorade in a Windex bottle. The time after that, the same person brought apple juice in a wine bottle.

Ahahahahahah... ahh, you speak as if being a minor is any issue. A good 90% of all teens I've known in my life drank themselves to ethylic coma from the ripe age of 15. Half of 'em smoked tobacco and pot at the same age, too.

At  least your cripple counter isn't at nineteen yet.

• Adel X2
• Izerna X 1
• Leon X 1
• Aegina X 4
• Czene X 7
• Dean X 1
• Christine X 2
• Faye X 1

Jesus, how'd you even manage?

But I am obviously way worse than you, so they're probably mostly on me.

How could you say something so horrible to Benice?! I demand that you apologize to Benice at once!

Aegina's third wasn't, though! It left her at eight HP! EIGHT!  AND SHE STILL GOT CRIPPLED!

Ahahahahah... aaahhh, yes. That's always nice, isn't it? I bet imma love it when it happens to me. Expect a ton of CAPSLOCK AND UNDERLINE when it comes to pass.

The spear charging map animations is pathetic. They probably should have tried to make it at least ressemble the full animation. Then again, teleportation is a thing that the Raze empire seems to use a lot, so I guess Spear knights can too.

Part of why they're so bad is that you get to compare them to the full animation. Which is, y'know, one of the best animations in the whole game?

 

On 5/1/2020 at 11:46 PM, Golb89 said:

So Kaga did "Arknights" first too (but without the kemonomimis, so it doesn't count)

Two replies and you're already the master of referencing things I don't know...

In which case, i think i might know something about Derrick's tragic past:

  Reveal hidden contents

 

You had me until he kicked a child. Derrick would never do that. He's a great man.

And his even more tragic future too:

  Reveal hidden contents

Maybe.

Okay, that one got a laugh out of me, not gonna lie. Hahahaha...

(Until a month ago i would have probably edited Ward's face on it myself before posting it, but eh...)

What happened a month ago, if you don't mind me asking?

 

 

:

 

Spoiler

First off, I'd like to show off the Pallas Riana animations. I had to split the gif into three parts, because otherwise it was far too heavy. Please forgive me.

 

 

 

Amazing.

 

Okay, so, the map.

Pretty simple map. We got a bunch of horses. Most of them are out of our reach,  so they'll be captured by the enemy, but we can get them by kiling their carriers. The horses appear back on the map when their carrier dies. Except, guess what: Ruben, being the BWS expert he is, had no idea that the enemies drop the horses they catch. I just saw that there was no D next to the horse in their inventory and figured I'd have to capture the enemies or something.

The result is that I will only get one horse. Wonderful.

Still, a few cheap horses aren't that big of a loss, and there is an incentive to ignore them and rush the boss instead. He's a bounty target, and he'll escape after a few turns. The problem here is that I thought it took him way less turns to escape than it really did. As a result, I threw caution to the wind and just threw all my units in his direction, completely neglecting even trying to kill the horse thieves.

In summary, this is Ruben Knows Nothing: The Chapter.

Our brigand boss of the day is Seamus, because Kaga is just as bad as IntSys when it comes to name duplicates. Perhaps that, too, was in Kaga's Notes and that's why Hilda, Arthur #5 and Tomas exist?

Anyway, generic brigand yada yada. Not much to see here.

After many months of arduous travel, we have finally made it to our glorious destination!

Months? We've only been on the road for three days...

...okay, hold up, perhaps there is something to see here...

See the bigger picture, lad! With the taking of these horses, we will rise from the ashes! Never again will we be reviled, but rather, we will be feared for our awesome might!

Holy shit, this is the most well-spoken brigand I've ever seen.

Don't celebrate just yet. We have come to ruin all of your hopes and dreams.

I wonder how Dad and the others are doing these days...

Czene is only here because being deployed in this map is the first step in her journey to promotion.

The second one is right there.

Okay, so we could technically just skip the whole map by escaping through the green arrow, but seizing is required to get Czene her promotion. Besides, why in the world would you do that? Might as well decline the whole mission if you're just going to leave at the start.

I have enough time to make Czene move forward before we get more text.

Well done, my boy! Though it is a rather small one...

She's just a foal, boss... She'll get bigger.

Huh?

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah! I love this guy. He's amazing.

......

Ahem... Right, then! Bring this captured steed to the shack, and do not allow her to escape. All those who capture horses will be rewarded generously for their deeds!

Okay, so Czene crosses through the forest while the others circle around.

Yoink!

Jeez, be careful girl. You might get hurt.

By the horse, I mean. This dude's useless.

As expected.

Wonderful. Absolutely magnificent.

The thieves are moving toward the horses. I sure wish I hadn't found out about the horse dropping tidbit after the map was over. Urgh...

The folks continue moving forward.

That's better, see? When you hit your mark, you avoid getting hurt. Isn't that so nice?

That is the cherry on top. Thanks, mate.

And with that, down he goes.

Seriously, I'm so angry that I didn't know about the horses. And the worst part is that I knew the last two times I went through the game, I just had a brain fart and completely forgot this time around. I'm so fucking stupid...

Go forth and capture more horses! ...Capture them, I say!

Hahah... chill, man. You're getting way into it.

Ah! Reinforcements!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Okay, he's not capable of reaching anyone...

Hah! You, on the other hand, are a complete non-issue.

So is Sherlock, though...

...ahahahah! He can't hit Kramer! Excellent. That is a relief.

My heart still skipped a beat when Kramer missed. I know for a fact he can't die here, but... who knows, something might happen.

One of the horse thieves escaped.

That is safe.

Still, I think it's best to soften him up with Sherlock first.

...you incompetent-- I missed the screenshot, but he missed the first shot! Baaaahh...!

I'm fairly certain that he might have some hit on Sherlock and Ruby. In other words, please die.

Thanks a lot.

Ohohohohohohoho! More strength! And HP, yes! Buff myrmidon! Buff myrmidon!

As always, I get all the random injuries and cripples on the enemies that I cannot profit off of. This guy has shitty archer gear, too, so it's not worth even attempting to cripple him.

Second axeman goes after Faye. To be honest, he's more dangerous than the crooked axe guy, because this one actually has hit. But what can I say, I panicked when I saw that there was a guy capable of one-shotting everyone.

Anyway, archer's dead.

Another thief is gone.

And with that, I'm... already at the boss.

Ahahahahahahah! Even his battle quote is amazing! I love this guy.

Kapoom-poom!

Ahhhh, and no reinforcements, either! His fate is sealed.

Worth a shot! I could've used another sniper arrow, but, nah...

Excellent. Thanks, Sherlock.

This was a terrible idea. This was a friggin' terrible idea! Why did I do this, you ask? Well, I was so worried that he'd escape that I figured I'd block the escape point with Sherlock. The result?

Sherlock is FUCKING DEAD!!

He's so fucking dead... aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrghhhh! I'm so mad at myself. I couldn't have botched up this map any more if I tried.

These are my options. Ruby can't reach and Czene can't kill. Same hitrate, only Faye needs to nail him twice to succeed? Hah! Hah... Sherlock is so dead.

Well, I lose nothing by trying to save him. It's a coinflip chance of a casualty, folks. I'm just... urgggghhhh...

Bahh... oh, fuck me. This should not have worked. I didn't deserve this good luck. Not this time, goddamnit, I did horrendously.

So long, man. You died too soon for us to see your best scenes. But don't worry, I'll be showing them off nonetheless. They'll be at the end of the update. Don't miss 'em, they're priceless.

Paaaahh! Why does this always happen?

Oh, fuck... blistering barnacles... phew, that was close. And entirely my fault, too.

Anyway, now that the fright is over, notice that Sherlock is dismounted. In my panic, I couldn't screencap it, but Sherlock's horse was killed by the axeman.

You! You are the culprit! Dieeeeeee...!

Where in the world are you folks going...?

Well, considering a couple of you are using literal letter openers to fight, I imagine intelligence isn't your highest stat.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Yeah, right. Why in the world would I want that?! That's just an accident begging to happen!

...well, I don't want that, but Erzheimer does. So we need to kill this guy before we complete the map.

First, though, I must save Sherlock.

This is Ruby's first contribution to the map. I've no idea why she's even here. Like in TRS, you can limit the number of people you deploy if you want to, but deployment slots are limited enough as it is that most of the time you don't want to. Even if she's not doing anything today, this is still 0.5 happiness that she's getting.

Oh my goodness... Sherlock, stop getting hit by these low hitrates!

I had Faye use Sunder to take down the crooked guy. For some reason it's not visually activated in the same way as the other skills.

In any case, it worked. She used a flashbang too, for good measure!

Okay...?

A crit, and she could not kill. Oh, well. 39 HP out of 40 is still a job well done.

...Hah! Ahah! Yeah, fuck that! Fuck that up the ass with a broomstick! I refuse! See that? That's how I lose Czene! I may've done horrendously today, but I am still not insane enough to risk this.

That is better.

Eeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhh... I'll take it, I guess.

I just hope Erzheimer doesn't try using this thing.

Good work, Ruby. I'm glad I brought you.

Okay, Sherlock. More healing.

See? Some of us don't need to do away with the entire vulnerary supply, Sherlock.

Aaand you were useless again.

Ahh, but at least you're getting some skill. I can get behind that.

Oh, goodness...

Foo...! That could've been a crippled Czene very easily.

Instead, it's an injured enemy. Way to go!

Let's work on the archer now.

 

No...!

 

Good, thanks.

Since it's safe, I figured I might as well do this.

Urgh...

Gaaaaaaaaaaaahhh! Stop it, stop it! Why is this guy the greatest enemy ever? He's injured, too! How is he pulling this off?

He crouches down when he uses a skill while dismounted. Cute.

Piece of...! Why do I even bother having you use double-shot?!

You know what? She did next to nothing today, but a point of skill in both weapon types is good enough. I'm happy with this outcome.

Next turn, he's dying. Probably to Sherlock. He's spent the whole map 10 EXP from a level.

...oh, you've got to be...

Fuck this nonsense. I'm leaving. I'm not sure if Czene needs to seize herself, but just in case, I'm having her do it.

This scene is going to be terrible to convey. Please bear with me.

I suppose I can't expect that slobs like those would have a treasure stash...

Oh...!

Such an awful wound... You poor thing...

...okay, so that went well.

If you think that edit is bad, I'll have you know that the game itself does a similar thing once.

She slowly takes two steps forward.

 

She very slowly walks to the horse again.

...then the situation escalates.

Don't move around like that! You'll open your wound more!

 

To be precise, she got hit a couple times between each sentence. That must sting...

 

Once again, I'm sorry. This scene is quite hectic, and it's quite difficult to convey without all the sounds of Czene getting the everloving shit kicked out of her.

(This horse... She looks just like...)

There, there, don't cry... You must be so scared, trapped in a place like this... Shh, it's all right now...

......

Phew... this is quite the unpleasant scene to watch. Obviously the edits are my doing, but the sounds are... chilling, to say the least.

If you're wondering why Czene let herself be tossed around by a horse, well, the game will elaborate next update. We will also see the consequences of Volcens's decision back in the beginning of chapter 3. All in all, there'll be a good bunch of stuff to see, so look forward to it! Same thread, same forum. Fare well for me, please!

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban

* Unavailable

Capture count: 0

Reset count: 0

 

Current perfect streak: 2 maps, just barely

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

 

 

Bonus: Here are all the Seamus scenes I missed because I killed him too fast. First, I think I missed this by a single turn.

Inconceivable! This is our dream, and ours alone! Why would these interlopers-- No, it cannot be...

Bwahahahahahah... I swear, I wish I had been able to spare this guy. He's absolutely hilarious.

No, I will not be defeated here! I shall have vengeance! Alert the others! Show these wretched fools the power of our wrathful retribution!

Couple turns later, this scene happens.

Seems a bit too temperamental for that, if you ask me.

Still, worth a shot, I suppose...

Eyyyy he said the thing!

Augh...! Damn it all...

What happened?

She bit me!

Hah, rookie mistake... Let me show you how it's done.

Guaah...!

Bwahahahaha! So that's how it's done, eh? Ha ha ha...

Heheheheheh... this is gold.

Filthy animal... I'll teach you some manners!

Okay that is not gold.

Hey, hold on! The boss will get mad if you do that...

We're gonna have to break these horses at some point. Wouldn't want this one kicking and biting at the boss, right?

I suppose that's true...

Oh dear

This explains Czene's "that's an awful wound" line when she finds the horse...

Ah, thank you! Best brigand is here to stop this abominable violence! Which... means that, in the actual run, nobody stopped them, because he was already dead...

...Hoo, boy...

B-Boss...! It's not what it looks like!

Were you or were you not just abusing that young foal?!

......

N-No, sir! We weren't!

You... weren't?

We were disciplining this horse so it wouldn't do anything to hurt you! Isn't that right?

Perfect. Smooth Moves McGrooth, they called him. They also called him horse abuser.

O-Oh, right! He's absolutely right!

You were disciplining it?!

......

......

You were... You were worried about me...?

Ahahahahahahahahahahah! Bwahahahahahahahahahahah! Heheh... yes! This man! This man is hilarious. I love this guy. Can we recruit-- oh, right, too late, he died. Oohh, we're the bad guys...

(Phew...)

However, there is a higher task to which I must call you both. It seems that a band of interlopers is here to steal our quarry! You are to go out and deal with them!

Y-Yes, sir...

Even more turns later, this happens. If you're wondering why there's a horse where Czene was standing before, well... that's how I found out that units drop their horses when they die. Because Czene died while I was recording Seamus's scenes. Urgh...

Curse it all! I tire of waiting!

Oh, dear... watch out, alternate-universe units! He's coming for y--

AHAHAHAHAHAH! BWAHAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Aaahhhh... hahah... well, he did "end" it himself, in a way... pffffhwahahahahahahah... oh, that is amazing...

Fun fact: Aethin once told me that this was a slight mistranslation, but everyone found it so hilarious that he left it in. I cannot blame him. This is awesome.

Then these three reinforcements appear... only to escape immediately as well. Marvelous. I'm so glad I went out of my way to record these scenes.

Finally, a second bunch of reinforcements arrives, and these ones don't escape. The other group only existed to complete the joke of Seamus running for dear life. Man. If only I didn't need the money, I would've let this happen... Damn you, Valery! You made me kill the greatest of brigands...!

 

 

[BrightBow]

Honestly, might actually be for the best to miss out on those horses. The thieves have such a headstart that you can't catch up to them. So you have to block the escape point, which is right next to the boss. And then the Crooked Axe guys spawn in... it's all quite risky, to say the least. Considering you killed Seamus, who is a very valuable bounty, I'd say this was a pretty good outcome.

Edited May 3, 2020 by BrightBow

[Pengaius]

54 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Damn you, Valery! You made me kill the greatest of brigands...!

Seamus wasn't even wanted for any crimes, taming horses is completely legal. But you see, Valery has his greasy mitts in the smuggling of wild horses and just wanted to get rid of some of the competition. Lives are just business to him. If your crimes don't make anything for the “Big Man" he'll swap you for somebody who will. 

Edited May 3, 2020 by Pengaius

[The Roger The Paladin]

3 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why does she have a different hair color in every game?

Pretty sure it's almost always blue... though which shade varies a bit. Maybe she dyes it but can't decide on a shade? Because it's either that or it changes due to the Orochi blood (long story I don't fully understand because I actually haven't played KoF '95, '96 and '97, just '94 and '98). I mean, when she's in her full-blown Orochi form it's pink. Other characters who have it change hair-colour in the Orochi form. So maybe when some of the power's flowing it alters her hair? Actually... what if Roger had Orochi Blood to shift between Pink and Green. I've added another rung to my conspiracy ladder.

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He's like a rapey version of one of my childhood characters. How hilarious is that?

As bad as he is, I'm hoping he's not on that level. For the sake of Reyson.

12 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Reminds me of the time youtube recommended me Xavier Renegade Angel and I was thoroughly confused.

My brother quotes that all the time. Literally got someone to believe him when he said "Friday is Taco Tuesday", because the poor bastard didn't realize it was a quote or think on the impossibility of that sentence.

15 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

I never hated Serra that much, actually. Probably because she was so absurdly obnoxious that it became surreal. Clarine, on the other hand, is a little more subdued, which brings her closer to someone I could meet in real life. And that makes me despise her guts.

Which brings me back to when you played Binding Blade and the time I did know a girl like that in real life. And the carry on when I tripped over her (empty) violin case she left in the middle of the flaming hallway. Come to think of it, she was blonde and had a better (more tolerable) older brother too. Go figure.

18 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, how'd you even manage that? Still, don't worry. You cannot match Aethin's The Roger The Paladin. If you're reading this, man, please accept my humblest apologies, but I've seen few typos as epic as this one.

I personally think that's transcended "typo" into flat "improvement". Seriously, if Tear Ring gets a localization at some unknown point in the future through a bizarre twist of fate, and that line is not there, I'm going to be grossly disappointed.

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I remember laughing my ass off with a friend of mine reading a lame-ass creepypasta that, to boot, was horrendously translated to spanish. It was a great experience.

I also wrote a thing when I was like, 15, and posted it in the nosleep subreddit. It got no replies and it was swifly swept under the rug of history. And I'm glad, because God was that friggin' embarrasing.

Years ago, I wrote a creepypasta based off a "Haunted/Hacked" Super Metroid cart. Except I just described the normal incident with Mother Brain's monster and the oversized (ex-baby) Metroid near the end as if I'd completely misinterpreted it and this was something some sick hacker put in. I also flat claimed to have done the one thing no one ever does in those stories... namely turn the console off, when the Metroid latched onto Samus after "killing" the mutated Mother Brain (which I was calling Rethom Niarb because this was allegedly a sick trick and not something that should happen in game). So basically, if one reads it at face value and doesn't know how the game works, it looks legit. If one's played the game, they'll know I claimed to have turned the game off moments before getting recharged to blast that Brain into bits. I really wanted to find that story, but I can't right now.

26 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Pretty sure it's not the man who is adulterous in that situation.

Uhhh... okay, you guys have managed to confuse me. And I'm usually the dirty-minded one here.

Well for those who do not wish to know (this means you Hawking) do not open this.

Spoiler

It's often used as an abbreviation of the word "Cuckhold", which in turn is derived from the Cuckoo. You know, that bird that lays it's eggs in another bird's nest? Basically the insult implicates a man has a significant other who is engaged in infidelity, and possibly has children to another man that he believes are his. This is also where the "bunny ears" gesture in photos originate from, because that gesture was originally used in olden times behind a person's back to implicate he was, in fact a cuckhold. (Albeit it was called cuckhold horns). This is even referenced in one of those latter day Simpsons episodes no one watches. Anyway all that aside, it's also a genre of porn and a "fetish" these days. I'm not explaining further than that. Partially out of good taste, partially because there'd be those that argue I misrepresent that side of things due to my wish to know as little about it as possible.

 

36 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh God, tsundere Ward. That is not a suggestion I was expecting to see.

It's not a joke I expected to make. But look at him. He's cold when dealing with them in person. He speaks higher behind their back.

On 5/2/2020 at 4:50 AM, Hawkwing said:

I read it on TV Tropes, which I take with a grain of salt anyway. That was an example of his strength that came to mind, and I wasn't really in "I'll check this fact" mode since I got distracted doing just that earlier.

Mind, just because it never happened in the main comics doesn't mean it didn't happen in the MAX line (which to be fair isn't in the main continuity but it's own due to being the "Adult oriented line"). Thing is I really avoided the MAX Line because the last thing I needed to see was him getting prison-raped and him responding by having his entire gang reciprocate on the guy's who got him's girlfriend while he watched as revenge when they got out. Thanks for that Jason Aaron. Remember that quote about critics and "adult writing"? Jason Aaron's Punisher stuff is literally that taken up to 11. He does a bunch of shit that people associate with "mature" themes in such a way it just ends up being vulgar for vulgarities sake. The the critics eat it up and act like it's "next level" writing because it's original. He doesn't even try to do it in a black comedy way. Because if uncensored swearing all the time like the rest of the MAX Punisher wasn't enough, he had to crank the bar up so high (or down so low) I'd never trust another comic with his name on it again. If that sounds like an excessive rant, it's me trying to save people from needing eyebleach. Does this make Jason Aaron my version of Horsemen? Probably.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, considering a couple of you are using literal letter openers to fight, I imagine intelligence isn't your highest stat.

"only meant to cut paper". Man, these guys aren't real bandits. They're literally mailmen who've gone postal.

 

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Still, worth a shot, I suppose...

Eyyyy he said the thing!

Is this a first? Your catchphrase on an LP character? Or has Aethin just being reading these too long?

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

This explains Czene's "that's an awful wound" line when she finds the horse...

How'd that get there before they went in though? Damn it Kaga.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...

Fun fact: Aethin once told me that this was a slight mistranslation, but everyone found it so hilarious that he left it in. I cannot blame him. This is awesome.

It's plain art. It's like The Roger The Paladin. If Berwick ever gets an official translation this better stay in. Somehow.

[Golb89]

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Two replies and you're already the master of referencing things I don't know...

So you don't know of "Arknights"...

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, that one got a laugh out of me, not gonna lie. Hahahaha...

... yet you know of "Inspector Derrick"?!

(Though i'm actually baffled noone else made that reference before)

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You had me until he kicked a child. Derrick would never do that. He's a great man.

That's NOW: until you show us his paralogue, anything could have happened in his past!

Maybe.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What happened a month ago, if you don't mind me asking?

Basically this (warning: very slightly NSFW content):

Spoiler

(That was on AN's subreddit, the same thing happened on GFL's subreddit in January)

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Go forth and capture more horses! ...Capture them, I say!

Aww, had i known about this line i would have saved the "Gotta Catch Them All" meme for this update instead.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Inconceivable! This is our dream, and ours alone! Why would these interlopers-- No, it cannot be...

(Potential "Referencing things Ruben didn't know about #3")

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Fun fact: Aethin once told me that this was a slight mistranslation, but everyone found it so hilarious that he left it in. I cannot blame him. This is awesome.

(Potential "Referencing things Ruben didn't know about #4" come on, there is no way you don't know this one!)

Edited May 3, 2020 by Golb89

[Benice]

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah... well, I've only picked games I like. Even FE6. As dumb and flawed as FE6 is at times, I have a soft spot for it. FE4 probably needs a remake more, but I'll admit, it'd make me happier to see FE6 on the switch. So I can marry Echidna.

Wise move. Although I do regret picking FE7, at least it's probably easier than FE6, which I was planning to do next. Wait...WHY DO I ALWAYS TALK ABOUT MYSELF?! I MUST CEASE MY SHAMELESS SELF-ADVERTISING! IGNORE MEEEEEE...

Because that's why I pay The Roger to do it for me.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

To be brutally honest, I never believed it was true. You need to work on your trickery.

Dang.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, well. Don't worry. At least you're not the guy who fails to get all the references. Like Roundabout five fuckin' times.

I don't even know what Roundabout is.

Unless it's the To Be Continued song:

Spoiler

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A few villains die in other stories. Remember the Broken Ear's brothers? The ones who drowned and were depicted being taken to Hell by demons? Yeah... I'm not sure if there's any other Tintin story where a good guy dies, though. Though in Wolff's case, it was necessary. His fate was precisely what cemented him as a "good guy".

And also the guy from Tintin in the Congo.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Steer clear of Land of Soviets, too. I didn't mention it because, unlike Congo, I never owned or read that one, but Benice explained it quite clearly.

If you want to laugh at culture shock, it's funny. Otherwise, no good. Even the art is... I'll just post a panel.

It's a good thing both the art and story got better after this. I'm pretty sure that this book is the equivalent to FE1 for Tintin.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, everyone was so lovable in his stories. Even the villains, at times. Rastapopoulos was absolutely hilarious.

I feel like there was supposed to be another book after Flight 742 to Sidney, (or whatever that one was called) because there was a lot of wack stuff in that one that didn't appear elsewhere.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Honestly, starting with Haddock might not be a good idea, because then he'll miss him in every story where he doesn't appear.

True.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, hell, even Herge himself loved Haddock so much, that when he remade Land of Black Gold 20 years after its original release, he found a way to shoehorn Haddock into the story and even made his out-of-nowhere appearance into a running gag in the book.

Who wouldn't, though?

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

My threads are desecrated the moment they begin existing. I mean, their very nature is desecration of all these games that we love, by virtue of being played by a completely horrible player.

You didn't get Ward killed by Zalius on chapter 2. You're not THAT bad. (Don't judge me! He critted twice!)

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... ahh, you speak as if being a minor is any issue. A good 90% of all teens I've known in my life drank themselves to ethylic coma from the ripe age of 15. Half of 'em smoked tobacco and pot at the same age, too.

Ehh, those kinds of things don't interest me. I mean, I've got a fireplace, so I could just stand in front of it and get the same experience.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jesus, how'd you even manage?

Let's see...

• Adel got crippled in chapter 2 and chapter 4. Chapter two was him tanking a hit to save Leon's life, chapter four was him getting crippled blocking Izerna from getting crippled.
• Izerna got crippled by that random spearman with a portrait in chapter six then got gunned down by Minas while she limped towards the escape point. I then Pulverized Minas with Axel even though I could have captured her with Reese since I had to restart anyways. (Except that for some reason capturing that portrait spearman triggers a cutscene with Daoud? I always try, but he takes down a whole bunch of people with him every time.)
• Leon in one of chapter 7's side missions; the general dude needed to be protected for the last turn and Leon stepped up to the plate.
• Aegina: The first time was ch. 4's main mission in her very first instance of combat, in which she took 14 damage and got crippled on turn 4. No. 2 was I think in ch.5's side mission, although I don't quite remember, three was chapter 6 where she got hit by the portrait spearman then gunned down by Minas. And pulverized Minas again with Axel. I am not fond of her. The last was chapter 7 on the last turn where she got hit by a crossbow, although it didn't matter because she was already next to the escape point
• Czene...Oh boy...She dodged her first attack as a level six thief in chapter 6's main mission. That is all I'll say. She also got crippled on three of my four attempts on that chapter.
• Dean: Chapter 6's main mission where he tanked the spear knight, but got crippled with 2 hp left.
• Christine has also done terribly; Crippled in chapter 3 defending Orbel after missing an 88 with aim shot, then again in chapter six where she missed two attacks at 82 with a swift bow and got crippled in return by a 28% chance to hit.
• Faye, my one true Berwick Love, got gunned by Minas but survived. And then Minas proceeded to kill her on her next turn. Axel then missed his 88 pulverize and got killed by a crit. And then Reese missed 98 with Gram to kill Mr. Lance knight and then Broke Gram because of the miracle charm thing. And then Minas gunned him down.

...I do get to kill Minas when we re-capture her, right?

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I never hated Serra that much, actually. Probably because she was so absurdly obnoxious that it became surreal. Clarine, on the other hand, is a little more subdued, which brings her closer to someone I could meet in real life. And that makes me despise her guts.

Serra's great. Anyone who says Aegina is basically Serra is wrong, though:

Aegina has more than two magic at level five.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

How could you say something so horrible to Benice?! I demand that you apologize to Benice at once!

I apologize, Benice, for being bad at FE.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

:

Oh no...I got to the "Birth-giving hips" scene and I never want to see this portrait again.

But why are the frickin' 90 year olds so much better than the ones from the main mission?! These lads were absolute gods!

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Thanks a lot.

Ohohohohohohoho! More strength! And HP, yes! Buff myrmidon! Buff myrmidon!

What the everliving heck?! My level 17 swordmaster Faye has seven strength! (Well, nine, but I gave her the Performance enhancing drugs.)

[Golb89]

1 hour ago, Benice said:

Why would anyone want to oppose the communist party though?

Also, addendum to my previous post:

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I never hated Serra that much, actually. Probably because she was so absurdly obnoxious that it became surreal. Clarine, on the other hand, is a little more subdued, which brings her closer to someone I could meet in real life. And that makes me despise her guts.

Spoiler

You also need to consider that Serra put on the "rich&spoiled brat™" act to cover up the fact she's just a lowly orphan whose parents will never return (since they are either dead and/or abandoned her, don't remember if that was made clear in her supports), whereas Clarine is the real deal.

(Plus, pretty sure with Serra there was no incest involved)

 

Edited May 3, 2020 by Golb89